Wikipedia:Peer review/Numa Numa/archive1

Numa Numa
Considering this is probably the biggest internet phenomenon there has ever been this is a pretty shocking article. I think we can get it to Ga standard at least. Buc 17:34, 6 April 2007 (UTC)
 * Please see automated peer review suggestions here. Thanks, Ruhrfisch 02:54, 4 May 2007 (UTC)

Review By Karanacs
Numa Numa (or "the Numa Numa Dance") is an Internet phenomenon in which amateurs create their own music videos singing the song "Dragostea din tei" by Moldovan pop band O-Zone. The phrase "Numa Numa" comes from the chorus of the song, "nu mă, nu mă iei," meaning, roughly, "don't want don't want to take me."
 * You definitely have some citation issues here:
 * need to verify the article so that you can ensure that all of the citations are being used properly (and then remove the cleanup tag).
 * Citations should be listed at the end of sentences containing direct quotations, so that you know where the quote was taken from.
 * Need citations in the parodies sections
 * Make your citation format consistent -- preferably with all footnotes -- instead of the dual methods that are being used now.
 * Please use the proper citation format, including the name of the author, publisher name, and publication date.
 * Remove any red internal links
 * The lead is not very informative; I had to read the article to actually understand what you meant.  How about something more like:

The original, and most famous, version was created and posted by Gary Brolsma. His video was ranked 28th in the 100 Greatest Funny Moments, broadcast by Channel 4 in the UK.
 * when you say "brought the Numa Numa phenomenon to the US" do you mean that it was already a phenomenon somewhere else? If so, where and what is the history?  If not, change the wording.
 * I would start the main article with a little bit of background about the song. When and where was it originally recorded?  Where has it been released or used?  How would people have heard of it before this phenomena?  What is the song primarily about and is there anything interesting about the lyrics? How long is it, and in what language was it sung?
 * What about Brolsma's video was so exciting? Can you find and cite a description of what he did in the video?
 * "viral video" is jargon -- can you explain what it is or link to a page which explains the term?
 * Explain more about the New Numa Contest. Who is hosting/sponsoring the contest?  How are the winners chosen?  Have many people entered?  If so, how do their entries differ from Brolsma's?
 * Since you have an external links section, do not include external links in the main body of the article.
 * The parodies section reads more like a compressed list. Provide details (and sources) for a few of the most notable parodies, and trim the total list.  How do these parodies differ from the entries in the New Numa contest (or is there a difference at all)?

In general, the article needs to be rewritten using the assumption that people reading it have never heard of it before. If you can provide more explanation and details, the article won't seem quite as rushed, and will read a lot better. Good luck! Karanacs 15:06, 2 May 2007 (UTC)