Wikipedia:Peer review/Plymouth, Massachusetts/archive1

Plymouth, Massachusetts
I've been working on this article for a while now. The article achieved GA status on July 31, 2007, but has since been greatly expanded and given more references, images, and information. I am hoping to get it to FA-Status. Any comments and suggestions would be great, and I will do my best to respond to each one immediately. Thanks, Raime 05:30, 11 August 2007 (UTC)

Malinaccier's Review

Really, there aren't too many problems with the article. Just keep editing! •Malinaccier• T / C  20:30, 13 August 2007 (UTC)
 * Red links: The article has a few, well a lot of red links (they look like this: redlink, they are links to empty pages). You should spend sometime working on this.  You can use Popups (if you don't already) to make this easier.
 * ✅ - No more redlinks in article. Raime 03:11, 14 August 2007 (UTC)
 * Pictures: You have a ton of pictures on this page. I usually like articles that have a lot of pictures, but this one is just a little too cluttered for me.  They make the page load slower for users with dial up, and take up reader's bandwidth.  The text has also been squeezed into the middle of the page, which doesn't look very good.  This may just be my personal dislike, but I would ask around.
 * ✅ - Removed through images that crowded scetions. Do you see any other image problems? Raime 03:11, 14 August 2007 (UTC)
 * Thank you for review. Do you think this is anywhere close to being a FAC? Any more suggestions? Raime 03:11, 14 August 2007 (UTC)

Some comments:
 * Images - two seem oddly placed: the church in the "Climate" section and the monument in "Demographics". How do those illustrate the topic?
 * Well, the church fits somehwat in climate, as it was a rainy/cloudy day. It seemed like the only image that could possible fit in that section. There was no suitable image for "Demographics", so I followed along the lines of the "Media" section of the Boston, Massachusetts FA and added and important image that didn't fit in anywhere else. Is this really a major issue? It seems that several city/town articles put important images into sections that don't fit with the images, but do not have a suitable image that fit in with the topic. Raime 02:28, 18 August 2007 (UTC)
 * References - some are stretching for reliability, especially in the Modern History section (don't use a real estate company as a reference on population statistics). 'Unlikely to be re-chartered as a city'..why not?
 * ✅ - Removed inappropriate references. Raime 16:47, 24 August 2007 (UTC)
 * In "History" I can see a problem with balance. One paragraph explaining an entire century, followed by one paragraph on 30 years of unprecedented growth, followed by two paragraphs on incomplete developments? I'd recommend moving the developments into a paragraph on urban geography in the "Geography" section (or an "Economy" section), and expanding on the population boom.
 * ✅ - I placed the development information in a new "Economy" section. Raime 02:28, 18 August 2007 (UTC)
 * In "Demographics", avoid repeating lists of census data, like 'x% White, x% African American, x% Native American, x% Asian, x% Pacific Islander, x% from other races, and x% from two or more races.' This kind of number heavy prose is better presented in tables or graphs. It is interesting to compare the city's key (or salient) demographics with that of the state or country.
 * The "Demographics" section was bot-generated, and needs a lot of work. That is a great idea about state compariosn, I'll get working on that as soon as possible. Raime 02:28, 18 August 2007 (UTC)
 * There are a number of unnecessary or hyped words used. For example, "It is a popular camping...", "...boasts a natural beach...", "Plymouth is a major tourist destination...", "Plymouth operates a large school system...", "Students wishing to receive a...", "Plymouth has played a very important role in American..." The adjectives are unnecessary extra words.
 * ✅ - removed hyped words, except for "large" school district. This actually isn't hyped, the Plymouth School District is one of the largest in the state, and well above the Massachusetts average for numbe rof schools operated in a single system. I've added this information to the article. Raime 02:28, 18 August 2007 (UTC)
 * Potential topics you may wish to consider: map illustrating roads and other features, crime statistics, municipal infrastructure.
 * Great ideas. This will probably take awhile, but I'll get working on it as sson as possible. Raime 02:28, 18 August 2007 (UTC)
 * The use of stubby paragraphs (like the last one in "History", "Ferry", "Government") could result in an FAC objection based on prose. They seem like mere mentionings rather than part of a developed topic. --maclean 07:10, 17 August 2007 (UTC)
 * ✅ - Combined stubby paragraphs with larger ones. Raime 02:28, 18 August 2007 (UTC)
 * Thank you for your very detailed review. Raime 02:28, 18 August 2007 (UTC)