Wikipedia:Peer review/Queen (band)/archive3

Queen (band)
This peer review discussion has been closed. I've listed this article for peer review because I'd like to finally push this article through as a featured one. Me and the other frequent editors have been doing a lot of work on this article in the recent weeks and would like to know your thoughts on what could be improved before we enter it as a FA nominee.
 * Previous peer review

Thanks,  The Stig  16:39, 20 January 2010 (UTC)

A couple of mainly technical things I noticed:


 * Refs 2-5, 26, 81, 82 need extra information on them, currently they're just links. Author, date etc.
 * Refs 16 and 101 have been marked as dead, these need fixing
 * dablinks brings up Amandla, Band Aid and Dave Stewart pointing to disambig pages, point these in the right direction.
 * Alt text needed for all images though all the licensing looks great.

I'll try and do a thorough read through later, bit strapped for time but I hope that helps.  Cr im so nF ox  talk 20:54, 22 January 2010 (UTC)


 * Thanks, we'll work on this. You advice is much appreciated. :)  The Stig  22:09, 22 January 2010 (UTC)

If the article is heading for an FAC, the lead will probably need some expansion. Three somewhat beefed-up paragraphs seems reasonable for a major band like Queen. Also, a lead should not contain citations of its own since it's supposed to be a summary of the article. Placing one right after the the first verb seems taking it a bit too far and is quite distracting. If there are frequent disputes about changing "are" to "were", then I recommend adding a caveat as a hidden comment instead.

By just a quick scan of parts of the text, I suspect the prose might need some work. For example, there's a lot of stubby paragraphs that could probably be merged with others paragraphs or expanded. Cutting down on the list of bands and artists under "Influence" might be a good idea as well. It looks a bit like a collapsed bullet list at the moment. And you could probably lighten up the read a bit by sorting the remaining examples into (specifically stated) genres.

Peter Isotalo 00:06, 26 January 2010 (UTC)