Wikipedia:Peer review/Stuttering/archive1

Stuttering
Like a lot of contributors, I came across a topic that I knew well, was underimpressed with the quality, and felt something of a duty to improve it. I put a lot of time into this, but I still do feel kind of uncertain of its quality. Just in general, I'd like somebody to go over it and tell me what I did wrong. I have the feeling that it maybe should cover certain topics more and others less, or that I didn't place enough importance on specific things. I was thinking about trying to add some audio clips of stuttering, although I'm not sure if that's appropriate. Any ideas or criticisms will be noted and appreciated. --Clngre 02:46, Mar 21, 2005 (UTC)
 * As far as I can tell, the article looks fine, but I'd like to see evidence to support Moses as a stutterer. Mgm|(talk) 12:08, Mar 21, 2005 (UTC)
 * The majority of those names on the list were added by other people, but I did check out some of them. As far as I can tell it is just a jump to conclusions. Apparently the Bible says something about Moses being very uneloquent in speech and that he was "of a slow tongue", or something to that effect. People jump to conclusions and say he stutterered, but for obvious reasons its hard to prove or disprove it. Should it be removed? I think it should but I want to hear what another person has to say about it. On another note I've noticed how almost none of the articles on the people in that list actually mention their stutter, so I'll go to each and add a line or two. --Clngre 13:22, Mar 21, 2005 (UTC)
 * FYI, the passage this idea is based on is Book of Exodus 4:10:
 * Moses said to the LORD, "O Lord, I have never been eloquent, neither in the past nor since you have spoken to your servant. I am slow of speech and tongue."
 * I removed Moses from the listing since it's clear that neither this particular text nor its context provides conclusive evidence for Moses being a stutterer.  &mdash; mark &#9998; 00:22, 22 Mar 2005 (UTC)

I like the article a lot. I changed some minor things, and I found a few points that could be improved:
 * It says: "Some stutterers have even changed their own given name because it contains a difficult to pronounce sound. A cruel irony is that, once the name has been legally changed, some stutterers develop severe blocks on their new name while only now being able to fluently speak their former name." Now this last part really sounds too much like irrelevant trivia to me. Every reader can easily imagine a great lot of 'cruel ironic' scenarios for stutterers; to mention one such scenario doesn't add anything of value to an encyclopedic article.
 * I'm not sure about the 'Practical advice' section. I think Wikibooks would be a better place for this, as it is not Wikipedia's job to give advice to the reader.
 * References. A good article cites its sources. See also Verifiability.
 * It would be great to have some example sound files.  &mdash; mark &#9998; 00:22, 22 Mar 2005 (UTC)
 * I fully agree with everything you've brought up and I'll make the changes as soon as possible. I'll try and remember the names of the books I used and include them as sources too, I know thats very important. Thanks a lot --Clngre 02:18, Mar 22, 2005 (UTC)


 * Ok if somebody could please check it out now, I'd greatly appreciate. I made a major addition/reorganization and added some video clips. I'm also sick to death of the article so this is the last time I'll ask for advice, I promise.--Clngre 00:56, Mar 24, 2005 (UTC)