Wikipedia:Peer review/Thomas Beecham/archive1

Thomas Beecham
This peer review discussion has been closed. I have listed this article for peer review because this article is currently a GA and would be glad of other editors' comments to get this to FAC level. Thomas Beecham was not only a major musical influence in Britain, but he also founded several famous orchestras there and conducted international orchestras. I believe he deserves one of the the best articles possible.

Thank you, Darth Sjones23 (talk - contributions) 02:19, 6 February 2011 (UTC)

Comments from Arctic Night
 * Lead
 * "staging... his own hand-picked orchestra and a wide range of repertoire." - not sure if this is grammatically correct.
 * "He was known for his wit, and many "Beecham stories" are still told nearly fifty years after his death." - I'm not a fan of one-sentence paragraphs in leads - plus, this article has too many lead paragraphs for my liking.
 * Lead has been rewritten. Darth Sjones23 (talk - contributions) 04:03, 9 February 2011 (UTC)


 * Biography
 * "He did not find university life to his taste..." - a little colloquial, don't you think?
 * "...a youthful team... They included names..." - I don't think 'they' is correct here.
 * The first paragraph of the 'Bedford Estate' section needs to be sourced. The FAC reviewers will slap you if it's not.
 * I'm not a fan of splitting the 'London Philharmonic' section into sections like that.
 * The London Philharmonic's subsections have been merged back into one section. Darth Sjones23 (talk - contributions) 04:03, 9 February 2011 (UTC)
 * "he married Utica Celestina Welles, daughter of Dr Charles S. Welles, of New York, and his wife Ella Celeste, née Miles" - this is a little confusing, who was Ella Celeste the wife of?

I'll keep going with my peer review later on :)  Arctic   Night  10:27, 7 February 2011 (UTC)