Wikipedia:Peer review/Tripoli/archive1

Tripoli
This peer review discussion has been closed. I've listed this article for peer review because I would like to improve it to GA status. Thanks for any comments!! :)

 Theking 17825  02:46, 26 May 2011 (UTC)


 * Comments by Dana boomer

Although a decent enough article, there is quite a bit of work that needs to be done to get this article up to GA status. Probably the biggest issue is referencing. Some specifics:
 * The overall lack of references is a huge issue. Statistics, opinions and controversial facts all need references. For example (and these are just examples - references are lacking throughout the article), the Contemporary era section gives statistics without references, the History section in general has huge swaths of information without references, Law and government section gives in theory/in reality information without references, Geography has statistics and "more appropriately" (says who?) without references, etc.
 * The Economy section has a cleanup banner and multiple in-line cleanup tags - these would be grounds for a quick-fail at GAN.
 * Ref #16 (Libyan Airlines) is dead.
 * Referencing Commons or other language Wikipedias, such as is done in refs #18 and 19, is not acceptable.
 * Words like "allege" (sentence: Among the alleged fatalities of the 15 April retaliatory attack by the United States was Gaddafi's adopted daughter, Hannah.) should be used very carefully, and referenced to extremely good sources. For this particular sentence, there are no references.
 * The information given by some references needs to be expanded. Books need authors, dates, publishers, isbns, etc; websites need titles, publishers and access dates at the minimum.

Another major issue is comprehensiveness/broadness:
 * Colleges and universities - The title of this section should probably be changed to "Education" and information on the primary and secondary schools in the city added.
 * Sports - Is football really the only sport played in the city?
 * Transport section - Are an airport and an under-construction railway (2007 info, needs to be updated) really the only ways of getting around in Tripoli? No roads? No intra-city buses/trains/subways? Do many people walk, ride bikes, etc?
 * No information on demographics?

Some other issues:
 * External link #3 (Tripoli at goruma) is dead.
 * There is a mix of American and British spelling, which should be standardized. For instance, harbor and program are American, while metre and defense are British.
 * Text shouldn't be sandwiched between images.
 * Prose needs a serious going-over. There are many ungrammatical spots, poor punctuation, sentence fragments, etc.
 * During the 2011 Civil War section - "peacock term" tag that needs to be dealt with
 * The lead needs some work. For this article, per WP:SIZE, three to four paragraphs is appropriate. These should give a summary of the information within the body, without including new information.

As I said above, the article is a good start, but needs some significant work before it is of GA status. I will be watching this page, so please let me know if you have any questions about the above. Dana boomer (talk) 20:29, 26 May 2011 (UTC)