Wikipedia:Peer review/Turtles All the Way Down/archive1

Turtles All the Way Down
This peer review discussion has been closed. I've listed this article for peer review because I'd like to see it reach FA status.

Thanks,  TBrandley   &bull;&#32;  talk   &bull;&#32;contributions 16:57, 2 June 2012 (UTC)

Comments The Rambling Man (talk) 18:55, 7 June 2012 (UTC)
 * Don't think you need to link the word "drama".
 * Worth saying where "Global" is relevant to (I've never heard of it).
 * "Episode" is mentioned four times in four sentences. I know it's about an episode, but this is dull prose.
 * "a 0.9 rating " I (and probably many other readers) have no clue what a 0.9 rating is. Sounds either nearly perfect or rubbish...
 * Where is the production code referenced?
 * Infobox mentions Youth Lagoon yet this is not referenced nor expanded upon in the article.
 * Where is running time referenced?
 * I watched the episode online, which told me it was 45 minutes. It is referenced to NBC, it could be referenced to the episode.
 * "a temporary jail cell" what's that? a cell that later becomes a restaurant or a cinema?  Not sure.
 * "for killing Detective" really? or "accused of killing"?
 * ❌. That's what happened. He killed him, he was so mad that he killed his family.
 * "He - his "red reality" self - lays down " en-dash, not hyphen.
 * "e United States.[5][1]" normally expect to see refs in numerical order.
 * Don't overlink Kyle Killen, and after his first mention, just refer to him as Killen.
 * " in Awake' regular " missing something?
 * "5.0 out of 5" not what the source says exactly.
 * Don't SHOUT in the ref titles.
 * Ref 11, use en-dash for year range per WP:DASH.
 * ❌. That's what happened. He killed him, he was so mad that he killed his family.
 * "He - his "red reality" self - lays down " en-dash, not hyphen.
 * "e United States.[5][1]" normally expect to see refs in numerical order.
 * Don't overlink Kyle Killen, and after his first mention, just refer to him as Killen.
 * " in Awake' regular " missing something?
 * "5.0 out of 5" not what the source says exactly.
 * Don't SHOUT in the ref titles.
 * Ref 11, use en-dash for year range per WP:DASH.
 * "5.0 out of 5" not what the source says exactly.
 * Don't SHOUT in the ref titles.
 * Ref 11, use en-dash for year range per WP:DASH.
 * Don't SHOUT in the ref titles.
 * Ref 11, use en-dash for year range per WP:DASH.
 * Ref 11, use en-dash for year range per WP:DASH.


 * Global is a Canadian network that airs this show. Thank you very much for this peer review.  TBrandley   &bull;&#32;  talk   &bull;&#32;contributions 21:57, 7 June 2012 (UTC)