Wikipedia:Peer review/Vaneeza Ahmad/archive1

Vaneeza Ahmad
I've added this article for peer review due to uncertainty over whether the discography section recently added is appropriate and correctly used, with it listing primarily television programmes and seemingly no work by the subject of the article; for the sake of the article plus my own future reference, I am wondering whether a different type of section would be more accurate and appropriate in this case, and welcome more experienced opinion. Further, I have found no sources describing the subject as a singer, and therefore a recent edit categorising them as "Singer" is suspect; while they may have sung here and there, Ahmad's established career is reportedly that of a model and actress.

Thanks, Moggie2002 (talk) 13:43, 14 March 2020 (UTC)

Expect a review soon. --Paparazzzi (talk) 03:16, 12 May 2020 (UTC)
 * Regarding your comment about the "Discography" section: the whole section is a mess. Let's begin with the fact that all the films and TV shows she has appeared in should be included in a section called "Filmography" instead of Discography. You can order the Filmography section using this as an example. Regarding the "Discography" section, it seems that Ahmad has only recorded a few song, so you can include them in a chart using this as an example.Paparazzzi (talk) 00:41, 2 June 2020 (UTC)

I have further comments:
 * nicknamed Vinny → the article never specifies where is she referred to as "Vinny", is she known by this name in modelling or acting?
 * only to be become the face of some of the leading brands in Pakistan → which brands?
 * She returned to Pakistan at the age of 18 to study further medicine, but her plans were thwarted by a lack of high school physic → I don't understand this sentence, it seems like it was translated with Google Translate
 * The whole section about her marriage is unnecessary, mostly because of the weird and informal prose ("they were made for each other", " was heartbroken when he left", "The couple is known to be enthralled with each other.")
 * Titles of movies and TV shows are written in italics, while titles of songs have quotation marks (for example, Criminal Minds: Beyond Borders and "Na Re Na")
 * The whole information about the movies, TV shows and songs needs references
 * I would really suggest you to read Translation in order to familiarize yourself with the English Wikipedia.
 * This is my review. I hope it's useful. Paparazzzi (talk) 00:56, 2 June 2020 (UTC)

Thanks for the well considered comments. The discography section is what prompted the review request, and for much the same reasons you give. I had deleted the section early on as it was a nonsense, however it was put back by the anonymous primary contributor so I thought a review might be in order. I cannot take credit for much of the page contents save for adjustments here and there, however I am now inclined to knock it further into shape following your corroboration of issues. Moggie2002 (talk) 19:39, 5 June 2020 (UTC)