Wikipedia:Peer review/Vanilla Ninja/archive1

Vanilla Ninja
I've nominated this article as I am very keen on, and I believe i'm on the way to getting it to the quality necessary for featured article status. The biggest downfall I can see is the fact that theres not a great deal to write about them, but whats worth writing I think I have. I want to see how to improve the article to a great status in order to make it worth putting onto FAC. I realise most of the version (written by myself) was made yesterday, but I don't think the time it takes to write a solid article revision is relevant. Hedley 23:23, 1 Jun 2005 (UTC)


 * This looks like a comprehensive account of their career so far to me. For the moment, I think this can stand as the finished article, though obviously it will need updating whenever the girls do something new. Jess Cully 23:59, 1 Jun 2005 (UTC)


 * The artilce is well formatted and written. You will need to provide refernces, see Cite sources, so that people know where you got the information. You may also want to include a section on their video clips. --nixie 04:31, 2 Jun 2005 (UTC)


 * Not a bad article but I noticed a few things that could use improvement:


 * Intro Paragraph is a bit cluttered and slightly too long for a comfortable quick summary of the article


 * Several grammatical issues including tense issues
 * (example: Formation and Eurovision Subsection line 1
 * Original: "The original line-up should consist of..."
 * Suggested: "The original Line-up consisted of..."


 * Expansion into Europe section first paragraph could use a rewrite because it's a little bit hard to read through because of the way it's laid out.


 * the Tough Enough subsection first paragraph about sex inequality comes on a little akwardly.

Jtkiefer 23:00, Jun 2, 2005 (UTC)
 * I've now implemented the above suggestions. Hedley 00:32, 3 Jun 2005 (UTC)