Wikipedia:Peer review/Victor Child/archive1

Victor Child
This peer review discussion has been closed. I've listed this article for peer review because it's my first. Thanks, Torontonian1 (talk) 20:17, 8 August 2009 (UTC)
 * Nice work, and welcome to Wikipedia!
 * You may wish to break your article into sections.
 * You may wish to add an infobox. Template:Infobox artist is a good one for painters.
 * You may wish to visit WikiProject Visual arts and ask for input from the painting specialists there.
 * I hope these brief suggestions help!— S Marshall  Talk / Cont  23:53, 9 August 2009 (UTC)

Finetooth comments: This is interesting and nicely written. I second S Marshall's suggestions above, and here are a few more thoughts.


 * I repaired citation 6 by making the title clickable. You can look at the article in edit mode to see how I did that. I wondered, also, if citation 5 was missing a title or if it might be the same as citation 2. If they are the same, there's a handy trick you can use to combine them. The "ref = name" device allows you to cite something multiple times; instead of adding a separate line of text in the Reference section for each instance, it adds a superscript to the initial line. To see how this works in actual articles, you might take a peek at Charles L. McNary, where the first citation has been invoked nine times, and the second citation 23 times.


 * Not everyone uses them, but I find the "cite" family of templates helpful when I do my citations. They remind me what information might be needed, and they format things correctly. They live at WP:CIT. If you use them, don't mix them with the "Citation" family of templates that lives in the same place.


 * It would be good to add one or more images to the article if you can find any that are in the public domain. A portrait or mug shot of the artist and an example of his work are two ideas that spring to mind.


 * "Perhaps the most significant moment in Canadian art history to include Child's paintings occurred... " - "that involved" rather than "to include"? Or maybe recast as something like "A significant moment in Canadian art history occurred when... " The problem I had with the sentence as I read it was that I had to stop to think whether this was a significant moment in Canadian art history or a significant moment in Child's history as an artist or both.


 * I added a peer review template to the article's talk page per the PR instructions.

I hope these few suggestions prove helpful. Finetooth (talk) 21:31, 13 August 2009 (UTC)

Torontonian1 responds: Your comments are very kind and helpful. I wrote this when I Googled Victor Child and realized that Wikipedia could have the only reference to this (minor) artist on the Internet. I will gratefully explore the useful suggestions you offer, having started with the verb in the sentence quoted. Thank you again.