Wikipedia:Peer review/W. S. Gilbert/archive1

W. S. Gilbert
Advice on structuring the article (it is rather unweildy with chronological organisation) and advice as to use of quotes and other structural elements would be very useful. Vanished user talk 05:01, 15 September 2006 (UTC)

Note: Noticed afterwards that it also qualifies for the more specific Biography Peer Review and have thus requested one. It may be better to reply there. Vanished user talk 05:13, 15 September 2006 (UTC)


 * Lead-in is very short in comparison to overall size of the article, and reworking the in-line citations will also help tremendously to make it FAC (assuming that this is your eventual target). - Mailer Diablo 04:18, 17 September 2006 (UTC)


 * Going to try and fix the lead-in today Vanished user talk 15:52, 17 September 2006 (UTC)


 * Fixed! In-line citations are still a WIP, though. Vanished user talk 11:13, 22 September 2006 (UTC)

In-line citations imporoving.... Vanished user talk 19:30, 26 September 2006 (UTC)

The following suggestions were generated by a semi-automatic javascript program, and might not be applicable for the article in question. You may wish to browse through User:AndyZ/Suggestions for further ideas. Thanks, Ruhrfisch 14:25, 13 October 2006 (UTC)
 * Per WP:CONTEXT and WP:MOSDATE, months and days of the week generally should not be linked. Years, decades, and centuries can be linked if they provide context for the article.
 * Per WP:MOS, avoid using words/phrases that indicate time periods relative to the current day.
 * There may be an applicable infobox for this article. For example, see Template:Infobox Biography, Template:Infobox School, or Template:Infobox City. (Note that there might not be an applicable infobox; remember that these suggestions are not generated manually)
 * If this article is about a person, please add  along with the required parameters to the article - see Persondata for more information.
 * Per WP:MOSNUM, there should be a non-breaking space -  between a number and the unit of measurement. For example, instead of 18mm, use 18 mm, which when you are editing the page, should look like: 18&amp;nbsp;mm.
 * Per WP:MOS, headings generally do not start with the word "The". For example,  ==The Biography==  would be changed to  ==Biography== .
 * Watch for redundancies that make the article too wordy instead of being crisp and concise. (You may wish to try Tony1's redundancy exercises.)
 * Vague terms of size often are unnecessary and redundant - “some”, “a variety/number/majority of”, “several”, “a few”, “many”, “any”, and “all”. For example, “ All pigs are pink, so we thought of a number of ways to turn them green.”
 * Please ensure that the article has gone through a thorough copyediting so that the it exemplifies some of Wikipedia's best work. See also User:Tony1/How to satisfy Criterion 2a.
 * P.S. The footnotes can be found here for now. Ruhrfisch 14:57, 13 October 2006 (UTC)


 * Quite nice, but (i) I don't see the need for a list of "selected" works when there is already a separate List of W. S. Gilbert dramatic works, (ii) it is rather odd that the whole of his life is in the first section! I would promote some of the 2nd level headings to 1st level, (iii) it seems rather short - surely there is more to say, given the number of good references you have used? -- ALoan (Talk) 14:33, 13 October 2006 (UTC)
 * I've fixed point i - the list of selected works was, in fact, everything he wrote (!), due to renaming the section but not actually replacing the contents. Point ii... I don't follow, to be honest - it only covers his life up to when he was 31 or so, which is around when he started his career as a playwright. The rest of it continues his history, with the last section covering his later life. Point iii is valid, and it could use an expansion drive - but it's a somewhat slow process as there's only three people really active in the project at moment (that I know of - it may be that there's other people in aspects I'm not as involved with - so we do what we can. Hoping that a push towards FA will pull in more editors. Vanished user talk 16:27, 13 October 2006 (UTC)


 * Thanks. On (ii), what I meant was that pretty much the entire article is under ==Life and career== (from ===Beginnings=== to ===Later years===).  On (i), the "selected" bullet-point list is, to my eyes, worse than the original full one - ones worth mentioning surely are already?  But, anyway, good luck!  -- ALoan (Talk) 16:44, 13 October 2006 (UTC)