Wikipedia:Peer review/Wario/archive2

Wario
This peer review discussion has been closed. I've listed this article for peer review because it's on the bounty board and it was a FA. What can it take to make it back as one.
 * Previous peer review

Thanks, Jhenderson  7 7 7  18:11, 30 March 2011 (UTC)
 * I think the lead could use a rewrite and expansion. The last sentence in "Other media" is unsourced, trivial, speculation. Mainly just make sure that all that can/should be covered, is covered. One of the points of FA is being comprehensive. I am sure that there are more sources covering him. Blake (Talk·Edits) 18:25, 30 March 2011 (UTC)


 * Ok summarizing the lead, remove last sentence, and source checking will be on my to do list. Thanks for the advice. Any more advice is encouraged if need be. Jhenderson  7 7 7  20:14, 30 March 2011 (UTC)
 * You know I said to expand the lead, not summarize it, right? It needs to be rewritten to effectively summarize the whole article. Try using some Good article/FA video game characters as a guide. Blake (Talk·Edits) 15:16, 31 March 2011 (UTC)


 * Yes I know but to do that I need to sum up everything that's in the article per WP:Lead and as you said yourself. So basically "summing up the article" is what I meant. Sorry if I wasn't clear. :b Jhenderson  7 7 7  15:25, 31 March 2011 (UTC)

Ruhrfisch comments: I see this did not get many comments, so here are some more suggestions for improvement.
 * This was demoted in an FAR in 2006 and looking at that may be useful for ideas for improvement - see Featured article review/Wario. FA standards have only gotten more stringent since then.
 * A model article is useful for ideas and examples to follow. There are quite a few FAs on fictional characters at Category:FA-Class fictional character articles - the two best models as video games character articles seems to be Master Chief (Halo) and Arbiter (Halo).
 * Watch WP:OVERLINKing - Mario is linked twice just in the lead. Most people link at most once in the lead and once in the body of the article, both at first occurrence. Infobox and refs and captions can have more links.
 * The lead should be an accessible and inviting overview of the whole article. As such, nothing important should be in the lead only - since it is a summary, it should all be repeated in the body of the article itself. However, the many characters voiced by Martinet seem to be only in the lead.
 * If you are looking to make sure the lead is a good summary, my rule of thumb is to include every header in the lead in some way.
 * There is nothing in the article on Chikao Ōtsuka except the infobox mention - I would explain that
 * Needs more background / explanation - The creation of Wario allowed them a character of their own to "symbolize their situation".[1] See WP:PCR
 * Google Books is not the true publisher of two of the references (current numbers 35 and 36) - give the book's author, publisher, place and year of publication, page numbers, ISBN or OCLC, etc.
 * When I search in this book it says "Wario" is not found in the text...
 * Seems odd that neither of the images is from an actual game (screen image)
 * Please make sure that the existing text includes no copyright violations, plagiarism, or close paraphrasing. For more information on this please see Wikipedia_Signpost/2009-04-13/Dispatches. (This is a general warning given in all peer reviews, in view of previous problems that have risen over copyvios.)

Hope this helps. If my comments are useful, please consider peer reviewing an article, especially one at Peer review/backlog (which is how I found this article). I do not watch peer reviews, so if you have questions or comments, please contact me on my talk page. Yours, Ruhrfisch &gt;&lt;&gt; &deg; &deg; 16:25, 15 April 2011 (UTC)