Wikipedia:Peer review/Winchester/archive1

Winchester
This peer review discussion has been closed. I've listed this article for peer review because I am interested in building up Winchester towards GA. I know that there are already a couple of problems with the article such as the Media and culture section, but I will get back to that later. For now I just really need a second opinion on the article first. Thank you very much!

Thanks, Jaguar (talk) 10:23, 28 May 2011 (UTC)

Comments by Rodw

An interesting article. I've only visited Winchester a few times so don't know that much about the city, but I am familiar with WP:UKCITIES so will comment from that perspective.


 * Per Manual of Style (headings), headings generally do not start with articles ('the', 'a(n)'). So "The Cathedral" could be changed to "Cathedral". There are also at least 3 sub heads with the word "Winchester" in them.
 * Done. Jaguar (talk) 16:07, 31 May 2011 (UTC)

History Governance Landmarks
 * The Lead could be expanded to fully summarise the article. There are some subsections in the article which aren't mentioned in the lead at all.
 * The whole of "Anglo-Saxon times" & the first & third paragraphs of "Medieval and later times" are unreferenced
 * I'm not sure what the one sentence paragraph "Further learning" is for - if it's more sources of information it should come after references. If it is an important landmark or part of the culture then it should come at appropriate points.
 * Watch out for phrases such as "famous novelist" it is unreferenced so could could as personal opinion
 * Some mention of Winchester in the civil war (eg, ) might be of interest
 * Anything significant in the 20th century?
 * When was Martin Tod defeated - this doesn't seem to be chronological so I'm a bit confused
 * A link to City of Winchester and some comment about non-unitary districts & their relationship with the county council might be worth a mention
 * Is EU constituency worth mentioning?
 * WP:UKCITIES suggests sections on Geography, Demography, Economy etc before landmarks
 * Do you have a reference for "longest cathedral..."?
 * Several of the paragraphs in this section are completely unreferenced. This is particularly important where claims are made such as the Pilgrims Hall having the "earliest hammer-beamed building still standing in England"
 * Do we need to say that The Da Vinci Code starred Tom Hanks in this context?
 * Good point - I have removed him from the sentence. Jaguar (talk) 16:28, 31 May 2011 (UTC)

Education Sport Transport In fiction References I hope these comments are useful and if you need clarification please let me know.&mdash; Rod talk 15:01, 30 May 2011 (UTC)
 * In the University paragraph, do we need to be told that Winchester is in Hampshire England again? - this looks like a copy & paste from the University of Winchester article. Could this paragraph be moved to the "Education" section?
 * Unreferenced
 * There is an external link in the information about the Womens FC team
 * Lots of short one sentence paragraphs in this section which could be combined
 * Several unreferenced claims.
 * Watch out for ambiguous terms such as "recently" restored it is better to give a year or decade if possible
 * I'm not a fan of these sections but if it is to be included it needed to be supported with suitable references.
 * References 3 (Channel 4) & 13 (History of the Guildhall) are showing as deadlinks
 * Refs 4,5,7,13 & 14 need details of the publisher, accessdate etc & 14 needs a title