Wikipedia:Peer review/Xtort/archive1

Xtort
This peer review discussion has been closed. I've listed this article for peer review because I've put a lot of work into it over the last two month, bringing it from a mere stub of an article all the way up to GA status a couple weeks ago. I've since done a bit more cleaning up, and I've added even more details. I think I'm getting it somewhat close to being a potential FA candidate, but I'm not sure if there may be more types of content, or aspects of the album, that I need to develop to get it there. So, I'm hoping to get reviews from people who are familiar with developing album articles, but any general tips would also be greatly appreciated!

Thanks, Torchiest (talk | contribs) 05:00, 24 April 2010 (UTC)

Thank you for your efforts on this article. I will review it with the fact that you wish to bridge the gap between GA and FA in mind.

Lead
 * This sentence is a run-on:
 * "It was recorded in Chicago, Illinois, shortly after the death of Wax Trax! co-founder and band friend Jim Nash, from the end of 1995 through early 1996, and featured a variety of guest artists from other industrial bands, but had limited participation from core member En Esch."
 * Consider breaking into at least two or even three different sentences.


 * The lead should be a summary of the entire article. See WP:LEAD for info on this.  Make sure it brings up every subject found in the article.

Background
 * It's recommended to put in-line citations at the end of sentences rather than in the middle of sentences. This helps with readability.
 * It would be good to explain how Nash's death impacted the creation of the album. The connection isn't really clear and leaves me wondering why it's in the article at all.
 * The writing in this section is pretty good and the information is comprehensive. Sorry more to come later.  H1nkles (talk) citius altius fortius 22:44, 30 April 2010 (UTC)