Wikipedia:Reference desk/Archives/Language/2012 September 2

= September 2 =

Cheers??
The problem for us not native speakers are the nuances. Let's say I have had a discussion with another editor, and I might have been a bit more edgy than I should be, but we have continued our discussion and all is well again, and I would like to express my appreciation for the editor in my greetings, when we finish the discussion. "A hug to you" feels too personal, but what could I say instead? Cheers?? Lova Falk    talk   13:50, 2 September 2012 (UTC)
 * Why not! --TammyMoet (talk) 15:38, 2 September 2012 (UTC)
 * I have read a lot of sarcastic cheerses from people. So I'd be more explicit if I really wanted to make sure someone understood I was trying to be friendly. One thing I have noticed is that a lot of people, once you have had any conflict with them, will see all future communication in light of that conflict. Even though you think you are being entirely friendly, and hold no "grudge", what you say may be interpreted in the worst possible way. That's harder to deal with, because you don't want to preface all your communications with: "I know I said your point was bollocks and your judgment flawed when discussing party balloons last Spring, please don't interpret my comment now as a continuation of that exchange..." Not much you can do, since if it were face-to-face you would see they are uncomfortable, and they would see you were friendly.  Just be aware of it as a possible reason for "off" reactions. μηδείς (talk) 16:07, 2 September 2012 (UTC)
 * "Cheers" is indeed often used sarcastically, and should probably be avoided unless you're already on good terms and have been for some time. If you were previously conflicted and things are good now, you don't need to do anything special, just keep staying on good terms. If things have been rough, sometimes you can defuse it by simply treating the other editor neutrally, and you may eventually warm up. And some editors are going to persist in holding a grudge, and will never warm up, so just avoid them and they will eventually go away. ←Baseball Bugs What's up, Doc? carrots→ 16:34, 2 September 2012 (UTC)


 * What I always say in that situation is "Regards". Looie496 (talk) 17:22, 2 September 2012 (UTC)
 * No more Cheers. I'll probably say "friendly regards" even though I think it sounds a bit too formal...  Lova Falk     talk   17:34, 2 September 2012 (UTC)
 * I find "I am glad we agree" or "are able to agree" on some point is simple and natural and puts the focus on the issue at hand, implying the friendly feelings without making them the central point. μηδείς (talk) 17:40, 2 September 2012 (UTC)
 * I'm a strong advocate of being formal in fraught situations. People in a dispute with you often see informality as disrespect.  It may be counter-intuitive, but my experience is that formality works better. Looie496 (talk) 17:56, 2 September 2012 (UTC)
 * I'd probably be more explicit. "I'm so glad to be working with you on this after our unfortunate misunderstanding re: party balloons last spring. Your collegiality is always a pleasure to encounter, and I'm delighted that we straightened things out between us." -- Orange Mike &#x007C;  Talk  18:17, 6 September 2012 (UTC)