Wikipedia:Reference desk/Archives/Miscellaneous/2019 January 19

= January 19 =

Trans problems
There's a certain person I see in my local store who looks a bit like a woman but who then started sporting a beard whilst elsewhere looking sort of female. How should I address this person: sir, madam, miss, hey you?80.2.22.165 (talk) 23:56, 19 January 2019 (UTC)
 * There are many ways to initiate or end conversations without using gendered terms. "You finding everything okay?" "Thank you, have a wonderful day." And its possible the person has a medical condition like Polycystic ovary syndrome  Eve rgr een Fir  (talk) 00:14, 20 January 2019 (UTC)


 * "Hello" is good. You can usually work a conversation without needing to imply their gender.  If you present yourself as firstly being open and friendly, rather than judgemental, that's a good start.
 * If you talk to them (about anything else but) then they might in turn tell you more about who they are and how they like to be addressed. There's a fashion at present in the trans and genderqueer communities to be very upfront about "pronouns", with email .sig files and button badges, saying "My pronouns are 'She / They / He'" and similar. Most people with complex and unexpected pronouns are also pretty accepting about their misuse, so long as it's innocent and early. The problem of other people being boorish about them comes in if they've been told once, then ignored that deliberately. Andy Dingley (talk) 11:09, 20 January 2019 (UTC)
 * Probably not like this [//www.youtube.com/watch?v=z946ZwaeKmA] Nil Einne (talk) 15:09, 20 January 2019 (UTC)
 * Here is some online guidance on how to interact with transgender people:, , . -- Jayron 32 16:00, 23 January 2019 (UTC)