Wikipedia:Reference desk/Archives/Miscellaneous/2024 April 5

= April 5 =

...
Struggling with self worth and excessive negative thoughts about myself.

Anyone knows a way for me to accept myself ?

I often think of myself as worthless and stupid, but I am often scared of sharing these feelings to other people.

I usually get anxious and paranoid when in social situations, and this has only worsened how I feel about myself.

When I experience strong feelings, usually negative, I bottle them up and hide them from other people in fear of being judged.

I am sharing these feelings here because this is where I feel more safe to talk about these kinds of things since I am more anonymous here. Usersnipedname (nag me/stalk me ) 17:16, 5 April 2024 (UTC)
 * As you get older, you will get more used to yourself, and will also become more brave. ←Baseball Bugs What's up, Doc? carrots→ 17:56, 5 April 2024 (UTC)
 * The problem isn't being brave or getting used to myself, it's largely how I value myself. Usersnipedname (nag me/stalk me ) 10:43, 6 April 2024 (UTC)
 * Almost everyone who is not a grandiose narcissist has occasional tinges of doubt about their qualities and thereby about themselves. It is not normal if such thoughts and feelings become so strong that they begin to interfere with one's ability to lead a fulfilling life. The environment can play a huge role (for example, parents who continually disparage everything a child does), but the issue can also be endogenic, such as being caused by a chemical imbalance in the brain involving the neurotransmitter serotonin. I cannot determine whether your specific situation requires medical diagnosis (in which case we are not supposed to answer it) or not, but in any case I think you may want to talk to your family physician (assuming you have one) or else a psychiatrist. If you are confident the issue is not a medical one, there are many self-help books on gaining confidence in oneself. Something very simple that has been reported to help some people is to use quiet moments to talk to yourself, repeating encouraging things over and over again, such as, "I am a beautiful person. I am compassionate and honest. People should be happy if they can call me their friend. Like everyone else, I can stumble, but I won't be defeated; I get up and go on." --Lambiam 09:18, 6 April 2024 (UTC)
 * Thank you. Usersnipedname (nag me/stalk me ) 10:25, 6 April 2024 (UTC)
 * Once, I used to be like you. I was miserable and sad.
 * One day, I sent a message to, at that time, my only friend:
 * "Man, I've been feeling really unhappy lately. Can you help me?"


 * He replied back. He said this:
 * "Just do something, man. That's all you gotta do."


 * I was originally kind of confused, but I soon got his point. I wasn't doing anything. All I would do was stay in bed and think about how "worthless" I was. But all the happy people I knew were great do-ers. They were great at doing things.
 * So, naturally, I went out for a walk early in the morning the next day. I bought some wheat-free bread, uncut salami, whole-fat butter and a litre of water. I went back home, put the food in my fridge, and went out to my local park. I sat on a bench and I listened to the birds chirping while watching the beautiful sun shine above me.
 * I talked to someone and shook hands with them before I went to a nearby KFC and got myself some 8-piece chicken strips. I savoured every moment I had of eating them.
 * I went to the gym and had a great workout. When I went home, I made myself some guacamole and ate them with salted tortillas while watching TV. I slept great that night.
 * The next day, I went out for a jog and I took about 2000 steps according to my phone. I then went to the park, then ate something, then took another jog, ate, and so on.
 * Then, I realised why I used to be so miserable: I wasn't exercising, I wouldn't take care of my body, I wouldn't eat much – hell, I wouldn't even shower! I would literally do nothing but stare into the screen.
 * So my advice to you?
 * Just do something. Anything.
 * 79.119.97.43 (talk) 10:23, 6 April 2024 (UTC)
 * Thank you. Very very much. Usersnipedname (nag me/stalk me ) 10:43, 6 April 2024 (UTC)
 * That means "anything except sit staring at a screen". Physical movement of the whole body - not just the fingers - is the key. -- Jack of Oz   [pleasantries]  17:40, 6 April 2024 (UTC)
 * Thank you. Very very much. Usersnipedname (nag me/stalk me ) 10:43, 6 April 2024 (UTC)
 * That means "anything except sit staring at a screen". Physical movement of the whole body - not just the fingers - is the key. -- Jack of Oz   [pleasantries]  17:40, 6 April 2024 (UTC)


 * , if you have access to it, there is a feature article in the current (6 April) issue of New Scientist very relevant to your circumstances. {The poster formerly known as 87.81.230.195} 151.227.130.213 (talk) 12:25, 9 April 2024 (UTC)