Wikipedia:Requests for feedback/2010 July 26

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Centre_for_Quantum_Technologies_(CQT)
Any feedback would be appreciated. Thanks very much!

Vikiinc (talk) 00:40, 26 July 2010 (UTC)

As far as I can see this is an accurate and sufficient description of the CQT. I work there 3 months per year, so I'm fairly familiar with the Centre.

Oxonian2010 (talk) 00:40, 26 July 2010 (UTC)

Congratulations on publishing your first Wikipedia article, I know it was a lot of work. That being said, there are some issues with the article that need to be addressed:
 * The references are problematic. They are not outside, third-party sources.  Eight are from the organization's own website, two are from the National University of SIngapore.  The last links to an outside source but does not provide a link directly to that source from the article.
 * Because of the reference issues, in my opinion Notabilty has not been clearly established. For a Wikipedia Good Article about a similar technical entity refer to Massachusetts Institute of Technology. Astrobotic Technology  and Jet Propulsion Laboratory are also other useful examples of well-sourced technical-research organizations' articles.

For pointers on how to proceed, Your first article and Avoiding common mistakes are great resources when starting out on Wikipedia. If you have some more Wikiepda editing questions, please come ask them in the Wikipedia IRC help-channel.
 * Shearonink (talk) 12:44, 26 July 2010 (UTC)


 * Went ahead and fixed that ChannelNewsAsia news article/Reference Link. Shearonink (talk) 13:12, 26 July 2010 (UTC)

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/User:Jonathanlevey/Harris_levey
questions answered by wiki advisors. Thanks OE and PianoTech!

Jonathan Levey (talk) 01:09, 26 July 2010 (UTC)
 * There seems to be a problem with the fourth reference; they need to be formatted like this:

Example sentence. Hope this helps. Also I think you need to add some more links to the article; for example Apple creates a link to the Apple article. As well as this consider adding an infobox such as Template:Infobox person or something like that, as well as maybe breaking the article up into sections. So, a lot of suggestions, but I hope they are useful. Please send me a message here if you have any questions - thanks. Chevy monte  carlo  - alt 19:11, 26 July 2010 (UTC)

Thanks for your elpful input and suggestions ChevyMonteCarlo. I have worked some more on this draft article, "Harris Levey" and seem to be making small progress regarding being able to make the proper footnote insertions, but in the reference section below, the title names that I tried to give the links (ie. "Arts Studens League of New York" and "Lando"), do not appear as the text I tried to write out, instead they appear as fottnotes. Please advise. Many thanks! Jonathan Levey 19:33, 26 July 2010 (UTC)
 * They've appeared like that because you've used tags. If you just want to add links, it's best just to create a separate 'External links' section and then add the links there, like this:

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/User:Eallen.tgs/thinkglobalschool
Hi all, and thanks for your help.

I'm looking for general feedback as to the written content in this article. I appreciate your time.

Thanks again - Eallen.tgs (talk) 02:47, 26 July 2010 (UTC)

Notability seems to be an issue, as the draft doesn't have any real inline citations and references. A good tutorial about referencing asserted facts on Wikipedia is available here and a good overview about writing your first Wikipedia article is available here.

Please study up on the four articles I've mentioned above, they'll all be an immense help. If you need to talk to some experienced Wikipedia editors about editing your Wikipedia article, come talk to some helper-editors *live*.
 * Hope that helps! Shearonink (talk) 15:26, 26 July 2010 (UTC)

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/User:Luminouzity/Canadian_International_School_of_Beijing
Hi guys, this is my first article. Please give me some feedback. Thanks!

Luminouzity (talk) 03:04, 26 July 2010 (UTC)

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Donald_Ashworth
Are my online sources not sufficient? I dont think there are many off-line sources for this article. But I still think a musician who played for the Tonight Show Band for 30+ years and numerous Broadway and studio performances is worthy of mention. I thought I was finished with this article over a month ago, but it's still not listed as a regular Wiki piece. One volunteer, ChevyMonteCarlo, was very helpful, but I can't even find his last response. Can you help? Many thanks. Jamodisett (talk) 03:53, 26 July 2010 (UTC)

You need sources for the lead paragraph/bio section.
 * Shearonink (talk) 12:59, 26 July 2010 (UTC)

Also the personal details(children, son-in-law) do not belong in the 'Education/Honors' section. I'm not quite sure what you mean by the article not listed as a regular WIki piece? (since the article comes up in a Wikipedia search). Do you mean that it still has the unreviewed tag? If you haven't placed the article here (in the 'Request for Feedback') area, that might be why. If you are trying to 'find' Chevymontecarlo, leave him a message at his -->>talk page.

Regarding your article: I can tell you've put a lot of work into it, but as I always say...now the hard part begins, editing and crafting your work accroding to Wikipedia standards.
 * A couple of points...


 * If you cannot find more than a few sources, Notability could be a concern.
 * Wikipedia is mainly *one* thing, it is an encyclopedia, but there are many things that Wikipedia is not.
 * Sometimes it can be hard to understand that WIkipedia articles must go for a neutral point of view with research that is verifiable.
 * This article seems to be a BLP or biography of a living person and special care must be taken with this particular type of article.
 * Hope that helps, Shearonink (talk) 18:25, 26 July 2010 (UTC)

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Neterra
I just rewrote some paragraphs in the article to make it sound more neutral. Do you think I have to change anything else? Could you please give me some concrete directions?

Mihaela Stoilkova (talk) 10:43, 26 July 2010 (UTC)

I'm sure the tone has been improved but, one big issue with the article right now is that it is completely unsourced. Please read and study your first article for lots of helpful hints and tips on how to improve what you've already created. If you need some specific help with editing, talk to us at the Wikipedia IRC Help-Channel.


 * Shearonink (talk) 18:34, 26 July 2010 (UTC)

The Great British Songbook
I seek help and guidance. Should you be able to give me any advice on this page, it would be deeply appreciated. Thanks in advance.

Stephenjamesx (talk) 12:36, 26 July 2010 (UTC)

The images used in the article have 'copyright Dan Wooller' clearly-marked on the images themselves. Even though they have been placed 'on' Commons, the use without clear copyright status is problematic (as is also the use of the unknown-copyright promotional poster).


 * Shearonink (talk) 12:53, 26 July 2010 (UTC)

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/User:B_javkhlantsogt/Usukhbayar
B javkhlantsogt (talk) 13:21, 26 July 2010 (UTC)

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Content_farms
Hi -- This is my first article. I'd appreciate any suggestions for how to improve it. Thanks in advance!

Danachandler (talk) 14:06, 26 July 2010 (UTC)
 * Please try and find more reliable references to the article, as well as consider dividing the article up into sections. Chevy  monte  carlo  - alt 19:16, 26 July 2010 (UTC)

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/User:Theatricalpegasus/World_Database_on_Protected_Areas
Any comments you have would be appreciated. Thanks!

Theatricalpegasus (talk) 16:01, 26 July 2010 (UTC)

User:PPA94/Pic_Micro_Pascal
Hi, this is a small article to explain what is this compiler, actually I cannot insert references other than the support site. Fell free to comment...

Edited and moved to main now, please review.

PPA94 (talk) 17:34, 26 July 2010 (UTC)
 * You definitely need to add at least some references to the article. If you don't, as soon as you move it it's likely to just get deleted. Chevy  monte  carlo  - alt 19:18, 26 July 2010 (UTC)

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/User:W.MGMT/Todd_Wolfe#Wolfe
How is it looking?

W.MGMT (talk) 17:45, 26 July 2010 (UTC)
 * Nice article, but try and add some names to the references. Here is an example:

Example sentence. The pictures and infobox are nice additions, but I think I would say continue to work on adding references to the article if you can. Well done on what you've got so far though; it's really nice. Chevy monte  carlo  - alt 19:23, 26 July 2010 (UTC)

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Society_of_Aviation_and_Flight_Educators
The article about this aviation organization has been posted (modeled after an article for a similar organization -- National Association of Flight Instructors), but has not yet been reviewed by anyone other than its creator. Any help/feedback is appreciated, and perhaps an independent review will allow the "this article has not yet been reviewed" template to be removed from the article.

Thanks!

Rstowell (talk) 18:24, 26 July 2010 (UTC)

Philadelphia transit strike of 1944
This is my first long article on a general interest topic in quite a while, so any feedback would be appreciated, on things like structure, style, English, etc. Thanks, Nsk92 (talk) 20:13, 26 July 2010 (UTC)