Wikipedia:Requests for feedback/2010 June 29

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/PubWatch
Hello, This is my first article. I would appreciate feedback from anyone that has the time. Thank you.

Steved1973 (talk) 00:12, 29 June 2010 (UTC)
 * Please try and add categories to the article. This enables the article to be listed with similar articles, increasing the amount of viewers to the article. You can start your search for appropriate categories here, if you would like to do so. Chevy  monte  carlo  05:34, 29 June 2010 (UTC)

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/User:AriZonaRosa/John_Dougherty_%28Journalist%29
Ready to go live?

AriZonaRosa (talk) 00:14, 29 June 2010 (UTC)
 * Excellent article. I fixed the category links for you and added a link to another article, and I think it's ready to go live. Shall I move it for you, and if so where? Please send me a message on my talk page. Thanks. Chevy  monte  carlo  05:36, 29 June 2010 (UTC)

First Presbyterian Church (Hartford City, Indiana)
New article. What do you think?

TwoScars (talk) 02:10, 29 June 2010 (UTC)
 * Good work. I think it just requires a little bit of tweaking - such as adding additional references to the opening paragraph and other paragraphs, as there are only a few. Chevy  monte  carlo  05:39, 29 June 2010 (UTC)

Guam_Memorial_Hospital
Please review.

202.151.76.28 (talk) 03:18, 29 June 2010 (UTC)
 * Please try and add additional links if you can, and maybe some more pictures. Chevy  monte  carlo  05:47, 29 June 2010 (UTC)

User:Raj6644/Tamil_Nadu_Newsprint_and_Papers_Limited_(TNPL) - Feedback
Dear Wikipedians, This is my First Wikipedia Article. It's my long time desire to write a Quality & standard Article for Wikipedia. I have spend nearly 4 days in learning before posting my article. please have a review my article & provide your 'valuable feedback'. Raj6644 (talk) 11:20, 29 June 2010 (UTC)
 * Is the Article Ready enough to go live?
 * Is the Article is organized Properly?
 * Is the Article's citation is enough to justify the contents
 * You need to change the section names into lower-case (upper-case section titles are not really encouraged on Wikipedia). Also please try and give some more descriptive names to references 1, 2 and 3. Also I think the article is too long (condensing parts into one paragraph would be a good idea) and you need some additional reliable references. Chevy  monte  carlo  15:01, 29 June 2010 (UTC)

Dear Chevymontecarlo, Thank you for your valuable feedback & time you have spared. I have tweaked my article to look better. I my level best to Condense the article into parts. Pls review & provide ur suggestion. 'I feel the article is ready to go live.'
 * Upper case / Lower Case is corrected in all Appropriate places
 * Relevant External references are added to the article.
 * Internal Wikipedoa references are also added to the article.

Raj6644 (talk) 07:46, 30 June 2010 (UTC)

Hi Wikipedians, Struck with a problem in my first article. I tried Chart in my article. Almost everything is working fine, but at the top of the chart i'm getting a kind of error mesg "Template:Chart/celltTemplate:Chart/celltTemplate:Chart/cellbTemplate:Chart/cellbTemplate:Chart/celltTemplate:Chart/cellbTemplate:Chart/celltTemplate:Chart/celltTemplate:Chart/cellbTemplate:Chart/cellb". 'Pls help me..' Raj6644 (talk) 12:38, 30 June 2010 (UTC)

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Cascade_Park,_New_Castle,_Pennsylvania
I just moved this from user to mainspace, figuring it was good to go as a start while I continue to research/expand it with more source info and references (three references so far). Any feedback/suggestions would be most appreciated. :) Thanks, and all the best!

Pianotech (talk) 11:52, 29 June 2010 (UTC)
 * Nice article. Please consider adding a picture and categories, if you can. Chevy  monte  carlo  - alt 12:12, 29 June 2010 (UTC)
 * Thanks for the feedback! :) Are the categories not visible, or did you mean add more of them? Pictures will be coming. I couldn't find any public domain images of the park that I could use, so I am going to snap a few of my own and then just release them to pd after I upload them. Those will be coming soon. Thanks again for the review and helpful suggestions! Pianotech (talk) 12:17, 29 June 2010 (UTC)
 * The categories are not visible - I will fix that for you. Uploading your own photos is a great idea! Good luck :) Chevy  monte  carlo  14:49, 29 June 2010 (UTC)
 * Oh, you seem to have corrected the categories yourself, never mind :) Chevy  monte  carlo  14:54, 29 June 2010 (UTC)
 * Well that's weird, I didn't change anything! :) I wonder if maybe the server served you up a cached version of the page that was stored before the categories were added? Pianotech (talk) 21:57, 29 June 2010 (UTC)
 * It might've been a bot that did it automatically, or you did it correctly the first time without realising...never mind, the category links are alright now. How are the pictures coming along? :) Chevy  monte  carlo  15:06, 30 June 2010 (UTC)
 * Pictures coming next edit! Snapped a bunch today and am looking forward to uploading and adding them to the article later tonight. Pianotech (talk) 16:49, 30 June 2010 (UTC)
 * Pictures added! Pianotech (talk) 22:20, 30 June 2010 (UTC)

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Doug_Biro
I've created a short article for a producer/director with reliable sources (newspapers, magazines, links to other notable people he's connected professionally). I would love some feedback on it. I would also like to know why at the top of it, it says "This is not a wikipedia article...". How do I get this published properly so that it does not have this note at the top? Thanks in advance for your help, Annunziata

webmistress 12:13, 29 June 2010 (UTC)
 * You might want to separate the article into sections, and maybe add an infobox. I recommend maybe Template:Infobox director or something like that. Chevy  monte  carlo  14:55, 29 June 2010 (UTC)

Thanks for your reply. Sorry it took me a minute to get back to you but I was out of the country with only iphone connections. Originally, since this was my first article and I am a programmer, I was very diligent in making it much more rich (with pictures and categories and charts) but then I revised my tack when I read in the tutorials that I should start with less and then build from there. Here is a link to the first version (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/User:Annunziatag/Doug_biro2), which is more in line with what you are thinking, but it is still missing some of the information (birth date, ex-spouse name, etc), so I went with what I had verified and planned to add from there. I am thinking that this "abridged" version makes it appear more like a stub, thus the note that it is "not a wikipedia article" which I think looks bad (for me and for the subject of the article). Please let me know your thoughts on this.

Daniel_Isenberg
I added reliable sources and I believe that the article is validly important. Please contribute any feedback. Thanks.

Elmopuck (talk) 17:11, 29 June 2010 (UTC)

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/User:James_Murday/James
Please review this article and let me know this can be accepted for Wikipedia. Thanks James

James Murday 17:41, 29 June 2010 (UTC)
 * I made some minor improvements. I think you should try adding more categories (the one you have at the moment doesn't lead anywhere - it's a red link) and more reliable references, if you can. Also I don't think the full list of products is really necessary, as it makes the article sound more like an advertisement. I think you should cancel the full list down into a few brief sentences instead. Chevy  monte  carlo  15:10, 30 June 2010 (UTC)

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Joel_Lion
Please check if this Article is suitable for Wikipedia. Thanks.

68.161.240.31 (talk) 18:21, 29 June 2010 (UTC)


 * With the "Publications" and "In the news" sections you really need to incorporate those as referenced content in the article. They'd make much better use as sources for further expansion of the article rather than just an indiscriminate listing of links, which actually goes against our policy as Wikipedia is not a collection of links. Other than that, looks suitable. -- &oelig; &trade; 05:59, 30 June 2010 (UTC)

Would you mind providing feedback for the page again, I have made various changes and added more references. Thanks!

Preston Bailey (Event Designer). I want to know why this is still considered a draft and not yet published?
Why is this page still considered a draft, and not yet officially published? Preston.bailey.intern (talk) 19:43, 29 June 2010 (UTC)
 * Given your user name, it was blatant advertising. Wait until someone with no COI writes about the guy. &mdash; RHaworth 20:58, 29 June 2010 (UTC)

Information
I am currently starting to write about semi professional and professional soccer players. I have begun starting with a local talent Matt Rosenlund who has played all throughout the ranks in the native of my country and has a very promising future.

This article will bring him more exposure and see him get more opportunities then ever before. Currently playing in the Premier Development League of North America. He is playing at one of the highest levels in North America and should be shown exposure for that.

Mraju01 (talk) 20:45, 29 June 2010 (UTC)

Information
Wondering if this article is ready to go live?

I am currently starting to write about semi professional and professional soccer players. I have begun starting with a local talent Matt Rosenlund who has played all throughout the ranks in the native of my country and has a very promising future.

This article will bring him more exposure and see him get more opportunities then ever before. Currently playing in the Premier Development League of North America. He is playing at one of the highest levels of soccer in North America.

Mraju01 (talk) 20:47, 29 June 2010 (UTC)

Want to make sure it is up to par before going public... http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/User:Ariel_sofo/F_Score_Test
There are sources, but I have more coming. So I know this is just shy of being ready, but would appreciate any feed back.

Ariel sofo (talk) 21:05, 29 June 2010 (UTC)

Would appreciate feedback http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/User:Teichoscopia/Borderlands_Books
I intend to add some pictures once I get permission / take them myself. In the meantime, I'd love some feedback on other information to include in the article. I think I may have erred on the side of "less-is-more".

Teichoscopia (talk) 21:52, 29 June 2010 (UTC)