Wikipedia:Requests for feedback/2010 June 4

Siddharth Kara (author and expert on modern slavery)
User:Martinjonson/Siddharth_Kara

Dear volunteer editors,

I have just created my first Wikipedia article about Siddharth Kara, author and expert on modern slavery. Please could I trouble you to review the article, and give me your advice and assistance on how to improve it before I move it to the article space, so that it has the best chances of being accepted?

Thanks in advance for your time and insights!

Martinjonson (talk) 02:04, 4 June 2010 (UTC)
 * {| id="EnWpMpBook2" style=";border-top: 1px solid #aaa; border-bottom: 1px solid #aaa; border-right: 1px solid #aaa; border-left: 1px solid #aaa; background-repeat: no-repeat; background-position: 0% 20%; background-color: #ffcc99; width: 80%;"

Good job, but I would recommend the following improvements... 
 * style="width: 80%; align=center"|
 * Adding Reliable Sources - Sources show where you got your info from and that it is reliable\accurate.
 * Adding Pictures - You can always use a good photo!
 * Adding An Infobox - Info-boxes are always good for an article - they help people see the most important info.
 * }
 * {| id="EnWpMpBook2" style=";border-top: 1px solid #aaa; border-bottom: 1px solid #aaa; border-right: 1px solid #aaa; border-left: 1px solid #aaa; background-repeat: no-repeat; background-position: 0% 20%; background-color: #ccffff; width: 80%;"

 Great job though! If you have any questions or need help improving, or publishing it to Wikiepdia, feel free to contact me here or visit my page here. 
 * style="width: 80%; align=center"|
 * ~Qwerp  Qwertus   · _Talk_ · _Contribs_ · The Wiki Puzzle Piece Award


 * }

Hugh Stuckey become an outright wikipedia page
I have created this page for Hugh Stuckey who is a well known Australian TV writer, he appears several times on Wikipedia but doesn't have a page for himself. However I can't get it approved. Can someone help me out.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/User:Timmaurice/Hugh_Stuckey —Preceding unsigned comment added by 121.214.35.215 (talk) 11:36, 4 June 2010 (UTC)
 * Immediate problems that I saw - it sounds too much like a promotion or advertisement for him. Please look to try and rewrite the article to make it more neutral in tone. Things like 'most experienced and respected' and 'from almost he could walk' should be removed or rewritten as these sorts of phrases make the article sound like an advertisement. I also think you should try adding more reliable references to the article, preferably from notable third-party sources. Wikipedia articles cannot be used as references, and please do not rely on IMDB as a reference, as it cannot always be reliable. Chevy  monte  carlo  17:11, 4 June 2010 (UTC)

I've deleted these entries as they appear to be repeats - if I'm wrong, feel free to replace them. ~Qwerp  Qwertus   · _Talk_ · _Contribs_ · The Wiki Puzzle Piece Award

Sophie Chandauka
User:Nondaba/Sophie Chandauka

Article Name: Sophie Chandauka

My apologies, this is my third attempt! I am utterly hopeless with technology.

Again, thank you for having a look at this BLP.

The subject is Sophie Chandauka, a Zimbabwean corporate lawyer who has accomplished a great deal against the odds and is a business woman and social advocate to watch.

I look forward to receiving your thoughts.

With kind regards,

Nondaba

5 June 2006Nondaba (talk) 23:54, 4 June 2010 (UTC)


 * {| id="EnWpMpBook2" style=";border-top: 1px solid #aaa; border-bottom: 1px solid #aaa; border-right: 1px solid #aaa; border-left: 1px solid #aaa; background-repeat: no-repeat; background-position: 0% 20%; background-color: #ffcc99; width: 80%;"

Good job, but I would recommend the following improvements... 
 * style="width: 80%; align=center"|
 * Just A Couple More Reliable References - References prove the notability, or importance of the subject, why it should be included in an enclycopedia. You should add more from places that show this, such as a newspaper or bod website that is not theirs.
 * Adding Reliable Sources - Sources show where you got your info from and that it is reliable\accurate.
 * Wikipedia:A Few External links - External Links allow the reader to study more about the subject.
 * Dividing The Summary Into More Sections - Maybe divide the text into a few sections (ex: Childhood, Career, Death)
 * }
 * {| id="EnWpMpBook2" style=";border-top: 1px solid #aaa; border-bottom: 1px solid #aaa; border-right: 1px solid #aaa; border-left: 1px solid #aaa; background-repeat: no-repeat; background-position: 0% 20%; background-color: #ccffff; width: 80%;"

 Good job though! If you have any questions or need help improving, or publishing it to Wikiepdia, feel free to contact me here or visit my page here. I would also recommend possibly reading this. 
 * style="width: 80%; align=center"|
 * ~Qwerp  Qwertus   · _Talk_ · _Contribs_ · The Wiki Puzzle Piece Award


 * }