Wikipedia:Requests for feedback/2011 June 7

Michael Hosking
Hello, this is a new article. I'm hoping someone can help review please. Also, how do i add a photo to this as I can't seem to do it. Many thanks!

Hgem (talk) 02:41, 7 June 2011 (UTC)
 * Format-wise you did well, but you should add some more reliable, third-party sources to better establish notability. Also, your references should not be bare URLs. Try using the web citations template. Crisco 1492 (talk) 07:15, 7 June 2011 (UTC)

User:Idaho50/Kristen_Lawrence
After feedback, how does one finally get article posted?

Idaho50 (talk) 03:16, 7 June 2011 (UTC)
 * I have moved the article to main space for you. Crisco 1492 (talk) 07:18, 7 June 2011 (UTC)
 * You should fix the format of your citations (for stuff from the web, try using Template:Cite web). Other than that, it looks very good. Feel free to nominate it at T:TDYK or contact me and I'll nominate it for you (after you've fixed it up). Crisco 1492 (talk) 07:20, 7 June 2011 (UTC)

User:Grouchyhead/Nicholas Lore
This is my first new article. I think everything is in order. But, please take a look and let me know if I've forgotten or need to change anything.

Grouchyhead (talk) 03:33, 7 June 2011 (UTC)
 * You have quite a ways to go. Although your sourcing is pretty good, format-wise there are a few things that need changing.
 * You should add some categories to help people find your article.
 * You should wikify the article, link it to other articles.
 * Cut back on external links that aren't necessary. Link only the most important web sites.
 * You use too many quotes and your tone may not be encyclopedic. Take a look at some other biographies, such as Michael Jackson, and try to emulate that neutral tone.
 * I hope this helps. Crisco 1492 (talk) 07:35, 7 June 2011 (UTC)

Marcelo Martinez-Ferro
I just added "notability" sources for you to check. In most of the links provided, the name of Marcelo Martinez-Ferro will be found among many others, so in order to verify, just search for "Martinez" in the pages referenced

Thanks!

Jprealini (talk) 05:17, 7 June 2011 (UTC)
 * I have tagged some issues for you to address. The most important is for you to check the quality of your sources. Sites like blogspot are not considered reliable sources and should generally be avoided. You should also add some more references. Also, I am not sure if his complete list of works is necessary. The other issues are tagged on the page. Crisco 1492 (talk) 07:46, 7 June 2011 (UTC)

Cameron Sanders
Camsand (talk) 07:00, 7 June 2011 (UTC)
 * I have tagged the article with some things to be addressed. Foremost is your use of references. The footnotes, which right now are above the reflist, should go in-text to make it more accessible. Try taking a look at Michael Jackson or another featured article to see how it is done. I have also tagged some more, somewhat minor issues, for you to deal with. Not bad for a first try! Crisco 1492 (talk) 07:43, 7 June 2011 (UTC)
 * Also, I am worried that you may have a conflict of interest based on your username. You may want to read the suggestions at our guidelines on autobiographies. Crisco 1492 (talk) 07:51, 7 June 2011 (UTC)

Makshoof music
The article is about an online music talent discovery platform based in the middle east, its beginnings and associations.

I would like some feedback on its suitability as a Wikipedia article.

Thanks!

Rashaomer (talk) 07:18, 7 June 2011 (UTC)
 * You should add some more reliable, third-party sources to prove that it is notable. Youtube is often not considered reliable and in fact there are copyright concerns regarding it. Also, you should format your web citations using the template we have available to avoid linkrot; bare URLs are discouraged. Other than that:
 * External links in the main article are discouraged. They should be in their own section at the bottom.
 * You should wikify some more to allow interested readers to read about other subjects too.
 * You should categorize your article to allow other users to find it more easily.
 * I hope that helps. Crisco 1492 (talk) 08:06, 7 June 2011 (UTC)

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/User:Baisakhi_author/Manas_Sarkar:_a_Scientist,_Author,_Editor_and_Reviewer
Please give feedback on my article

Dr. Manas Sarkar is a biomedical scientist from India. [1] He is a reputed researcher working on different aspects of tropical diseases, like Malaria, Dengue etc. He is the author of many scientific research articles, published in many international journals (see, references). He is also the editorial board member of many international journals of repute. His biography had been included in "Who's Who in the World" (28th Edition 2011). Dr. Manas Sarkar is also the member of many national (Indian) and international society and bodies. He has reported many breakthrough scientific findings related to molecular mechanisms of insecticide resistance in disease vectors (see, reference). [2

Baisakhi author (talk) 10:18, 7 June 2011 (UTC)

Londonyouthgames/London Youth Games
Hi, could someone please have a look at my London Youth Games article and suggest improvements, for example, how I can upload/add photos?

Please note that despite my username, I am not a LYG employee - I volunteer for them at events. So I don't have a conflict of interest in writing this article

Your help is much appreciated,

London Youth Games 10:41, 7 June 2011 (UTC)

Marcelo_Martinez-Ferro
Hi...

I just solved the hanging wikilinks problema, and the link rot errors.

Concerning the requested references.. We have tons of them (just Google "Marcelo Martinez-Ferro" and you'll see). The only doubt we have is we need to know is which parts of the article need more external refs, since the most important ones (membership in most renouned Pediatric Surgery Associations) has been already provided.

The only blogspot reference we added belongs to the Pediatric Surgery Hospital which Marcelo runs (which is a non-profit organization), because it still does not it's own website.

If you point exactly what sections or mentions need more referencing, I will be eager to find and add them

Thanks!!

Jprealini (talk) 13:00, 7 June 2011 (UTC)

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/User:Haystackid/Information_discovery#External_links
Hi There,

Here is an article I wrote on a term called Information Discovery which I am starting to hear more frequently in the industry and I think could use a good definition. The term refers to the steps involved in looking at and distilling a corporation’s data corpus down to the most pertinent evidence pertaining to a court-related matter or compliance directive. In short I.D. encompasses the lifecycle of legal processing; eDiscovery, legal document review, computer forensics, hosting, etc.

I'd love some general feedback from an outsider on the article, maybe someone who is not so tied to the industry like I am to make sure it is written properly, non-bias and makes sense. I'm also a little concerned about the brevity of the article looking at some of the other written articles on here it seems a little short. Thank you so much.

Jason

Haystackid (talk) 13:42, 7 June 2011 (UTC)

jaqueline west (author)
I need help with disambiguation between the writer (new article submitted) and costume designer by same name. Can someone help with this?

Axiom71 (talk) 14:08, 7 June 2011 (UTC)

[]
Please review this page

Mallasseril (talk) 15:18, 7 June 2011 (UTC)

http://en.wikipedia.org/w/index.php?title=User:Reva27/Kent_Bottles,_M.D.&oldid=429631772
Can someone please help explain what exactly needs to be improved in this article in order to make it ready to go live?

Thanks!!

Reva27 (talk) 15:37, 7 June 2011 (UTC)

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Silent_Overture_(film)
This article provides a synopsis of a movie currently waiting release. As the distributing agent, I am not third-party neutral, though I believe I've kept a neutral voice throughout. Al helpful comments or criticisms are welcome.

CapitolHillProd (talk) 15:56, 7 June 2011 (UTC)

User:Univremonster/Cybaris
Univremonster (talk) 15:57, 7 June 2011 (UTC)

User:TradeCurrents/TradeCurrents
This is my first wiki article ever. Please review and make sure the titles, references, etc look fine.

http&#58;//www.tradecurrents.com (talk) 16:11, 7 June 2011 (UTC)

User:ProfessorJ9/Nuspire
Newbie here and would greatly appreciate any assistance in reviewing this article. I'm trying to show notability without advertising, which is tricky. I do not work for this company, but I will freely admit I am involved with the network security industry as an observer and occasional blogger. I don't believe this is a conflict of interest because Nuspire is notable and I've just noticed they're the only large player in the industry without a Wiki article.

174.252.242.215 (talk) 17:20, 7 June 2011 (UTC)

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/LeechHAT_premium_downloads_tooll
Good day friends, i wrote new article about leechhat project its useful to know that. I'm hoping someone can help review. thank you

CAPO13 (talk) 17:21, 7 June 2011 (UTC)

Don Chow Tacos
A profile on the fusion food truck Don Chow Tacos. This was my first article, I'd greatly appreciate any feedback!

Makenachiemi (talk) 17:35, 7 June 2011 (UTC)

League_Assets_Corp.
Hi there, I was hoping to get some feedback on the League Assets Corp. page I created last month: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/League_Assets_Corp.

GoldenR2011 (talk) 18:01, 7 June 2011 (UTC)

PittsburghBot/Pittsburgh Botanic Garden
New name for group: There is an article called Botanic Garden of Western Pennsylvania. The name has changed to Pittsburgh Botanic Garden. Typing either should direct you to article under Botanic Garden of Western Pennsylvania.

PittsburghBot (talk) 18:56, 7 June 2011 (UTC)

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/User:Cfj2222/Microsoft_Broadband_Networking
I haven't added a lot of detail yet, but I thought if I put this in front of a lot of other more experienced readers, it would help me flesh it out.

Cfj2222 (talk) 19:01, 7 June 2011 (UTC)

Philip S Portoghese
Dear All,

I have written a stub on Prof. Philip S Portoghese who is a legend in the field of opioid drug design. I request your comments on the article. Many thanks!!

Ajampam (talk) 19:36, 7 June 2011 (UTC)

Behzad Mirkhani
Behzad Mirkhani is an Iranian composer who inspired musicians and artists in Iran since 1990. Please help me write an article about him. Lolasummer (talk) 21:21, 7 June 2011 (UTC)

http://en.wikipedia.org/w/index.php?title=User:Metzfolife/Chris_Webby&action=submit
Brettbass (talk) 21:47, 7 June 2011 (UTC)

John Day (carpenter)
Again hoping to have "new unreviewed article" template removed. Have I handled the ambiguity about Day's date of death as well as possible? I would also have liked to credit The Book of Days more clearly to Robert Chambers, but wasn't sure how best to do so in the context of the weblink.

Gildir (talk) 22:15, 7 June 2011 (UTC)