Wikipedia:Requests for feedback/2011 September 19

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/User:Stormwirk
I've created a biography for Scott Bartlett of Saving Abel in my workspace. But you already have a page for Scott Bartlett, who's not the same person.

How do I create a separate entry and submit this page?

Stormwirk (talk) 03:03, 19 September 2011 (UTC)

User:Sonetta4/Alberto Florentino
I am basically proposing to have an article on Alberto Florentino under the general Wikipedia. He has contributed greatly to Philippine theatre, TV and literature and was honoured by a Presidential Merit Award by President Gloria Macapal-Arroyo in 2008. Sonetta4 (talk) 04:15, 19 September 2011 (UTC)

[]
I need help editing my first wiki page I have uploaded the text and all the links etc, but could some on review it and show me how to add the images I'm having a bit of a problem.

DaveHansonboston (talk) 04:43, 19 September 2011 (UTC)

Socialtyze
Please give me some feedback on my new article! Thanks!!

Dheriman (talk) 06:28, 19 September 2011 (UTC)

John Bohan
Please give me some feedback on my first article! Thanks!

Dheriman (talk) 06:29, 19 September 2011 (UTC)

User:Revilos1/Donald Andrew Spencer, Sr.
Looking for help regarding organizational structure, citation format, and opinion regarding notability.

Revilos1 (talk) 06:53, 19 September 2011 (UTC)

CML Microcircuits
CML Microcircuits are the oldest fabless semiconductor manufacturer in the UK. I wanted to write an article showing their notability. Any comments to improve the page would be greatly received.

Mocks1287 (talk) 09:32, 19 September 2011 (UTC)

User:Loudhouse/draft article Booka Michel
I have completed this first draft. Would like to go "live" in the future, but unsure of notability or if I did something wrong. First time writer! I would like to request feedback, any suggestions would be helpful.

User:Loudhouse/draft article Booka Michel Loudhouse (talk) 10:35, 19 September 2011 (UTC)


 * ✅  Ma &reg;&copy; usBr iti sh [talk] 00:14, 21 September 2011 (UTC)
 * I took a quick look at this earlier today, and noticed a few issues, so I'll go through them:
 * Manual of Style
 * You have citations in several headers and sub-headers - can you not cite headings, only normal paragraphs/sentences.
 * Can you put any ref tags after commas and periods, where they are used to cite mid/end of sentences.
 * Only the first letter and any proper nouns or names should have a Capital in headings and sub-headings, eg "Early career".
 * Please replace any "&amp;" signs with the word "and" unless it is actually used in a company/event name.
 * In the "Awards & Honors" section (which needs renaming "Awards and honors") there is no consistency when giving positions, sometimes you've put numerals "Top 20", sometimes full words "Top Ten" - best to use numerals throughout.
 * In the same section, sometimes there's a comma after the "Top" or "No" position, sometimes not. Personally, I'd recommend you put "Top 10: etc etc" as colons separate neater. One reads "Top 5 in ..." where the rest have no "in". Again, a colon would probably look neater.
 * References
 * Whilst most of the music produced appears to be referenced, none of his actual life and background, i.e the entire Life and Career section has only 1 citation. Please review WP:BLP and see if you can give more support to the content, as well as strengthen WP:NOTABILITY as you do so, as none of your references are about "Booka" himself, more his music. See WP:RS for info on reliable sources to use.
 * A few of your references have been dated as Retrieved in 2005 even though the article was started in 2010. Retrieved refers to when you first found, accessed and cited the article, not its publication year.
 * Also, as you've used full dates (eg. March 18, 2009) in the article, retrieved dates should be in full too, rather than mm/dd/yyyy form.
 * Further comments
 * Middle of Early Career, a line reads: "MORE ABOUT Hedwig Gorski AND EAST OF EDEN. WHEN WAS THAT?" - it doesn't make sense to me.
 * MENTOR'S NAME - missing a name.

https://secure.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/en/wiki/User:Alison_Sainsbury/IEA_Implementing_Agreement_on_Efficient_Electrical_End-Use_Equipment_%284E%29
Looking for feedback on this article. It's about an organisation that is a part of the International Energy Agency.

Alison Sainsbury (talk) 12:36, 19 September 2011 (UTC)

https://secure.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/en/wiki/User:Alison_Sainsbury/IEA_Implementing_Agreement_on_Efficient_Electrical_End-Use_Equipment_%284E%29
Looking for feedback on my first article. It's about an organisation which is part of the International Energy Agency. Once this is live we'll be looking to do edits on other pages (such as IEA, energy efficiency etc) to refer to these intergovernmental initiatives. (Sorry I can't seem to edit or delete the double requests!)

Alison Sainsbury (talk) 12:37, 19 September 2011 (UTC)

User:Nbmilnes/NCC Group
I want to know if this meets Wikipedias guidelines and that the sources are deemed reliable enough.

Nbmilnes (talk) 13:55, 19 September 2011 (UTC)

Nilachala_Saraswata_Sangha
Dear Wikipedia Administrators;

This Article has been completed since long time. Please review this. I am hoping a feedback from your side.

Dcmpuri (talk) 14:08, 19 September 2011 (UTC)

[]
This page is a biography. It has been tagged as a new unreviewed article. I am requesting feedback so that the tag will be removed. Thank you!

AngieRecord (talk) 19:01, 19 September 2011 (UTC)

John O'Brian
Hi there,

Just wondering if this article could be reviewed once again as several changes have been made and prior requests for more references and sections have been amended.

Thanks

Bdgallpen (talk) 20:46, 19 September 2011 (UTC)

Paul Chappell
Bio and my first article. Would appreciate some feedback.It has the header "new unreviewed article. Thank you!

Jeremylofgren (talk) 21:11, 19 September 2011 (UTC)
 * The article relies entirely on primary sources, i.e. sources related to the subject, including his personal blog, his ministry website and his college's website. Significant coverage in independent reliable sources is needed to establish notability.  WikiDan61 ChatMe!ReadMe!! 15:33, 23 September 2011 (UTC)

Untitledhttp://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Kimberly_Jessy_Mrs._USA_Petite_California
is a link to youtube considered a reliable source?, do you need to see something with the person in the act of what the article says they don? what is a COI? what can I do to help make this article submittable? I am new to this so any suggestions or help would be great.

Chloebenoit (talk) 23:02, 19 September 2011 (UTC)