Wikipedia:WikiProject Video games/Peer review/Kohan

Kohan
CORRECTION: The article is now moved to here. --VPeric 19:48, 22 January 2007 (UTC)

Firstly, I've mostly focused on the "Kohan: Immortal Sovereigns" section, and this is what I'd like a review on. I plan on creating a separate page for the game (rather than having it on the page for the series) once the article is written well enough, and probably going for GA with that article. I've tried to write about everything important, though my prose probably isn't good enough (not being a native speaker of English). I've reviewed other RTS articles (mostly Starcraft) for ideas on which sections to add, but haven't been able to figure out much: I recognize the lack of a plot section, but the plot itself isn't particulary notable (and I'd rather not replay the game just so I could write the plot section); a development section is probably impossible, because it was TimeGate's first game and I've been unable to find any resources on-line about it. Also, I was thinking of adding another screenshot, showing a battle most likely... would this be a good move to make? Any help is much appreciated! :) --VPeric 17:33, 16 January 2007 (UTC)
 * First off, the article layout is a tad... bizarre. If this is about several different games, then they should all be different articles. Since you're talking mostly about Immortal Sovreigns, I suggest simply moving Immortal Sovereigns to its own page, keeping the Kohan stuff here. For instance, Age of Empires II has a separate page for the expansion The Conquerors. Doing the same will make the article less confusing.
 * Yeah, well, that's the plan. The article was about the whole series (and short), so I picked a part to work on. I'll make a page for KIS soon. --VPeric 23:14, 20 January 2007 (UTC)


 * KIS was widely regarded as being a very innovative game, especially for a fledgling game design company. Source this, or remove.
 * I believe this is already sourced with the reviews in the "Reception" section, though I'll reword -- as I understand, the lead section should contain stuff that's already mentioned (and cited) elsewhere in the article, so the citations don't need to directly be there? --VPeric 23:14, 20 January 2007 (UTC)
 * Not necessarily, no. Technically its ok for there to not be refs in the lead, but it should be expanded. Dåvid ƒuchs  (talk &bull; contribs) 23:19, 20 January 2007 (UTC)


 * The lead in general: if you move this to its own section, you'll especially want to expand on the lead. See WP:LEAD for more info and tips.
 * The references are 'outdated' for lack of a better word: yoyu're encouraged to use the format now (you have all the info required, but that'll make it nicer in any case.)
 * I used this to make the references - didn't know it was outdated. VPeric 23:14, 20 January 2007 (UTC)


 * As per convention on most game articles, move the gameplay above the plot (the purpose is to introduce game mechanics, etc. before going into detail about the story.
 * minor copyediting.
 * Source it! I don't care if its the game manual or in-game dialogue, but source whatever is POV or important. Ex: KIS has a distinctive economy, featuring six resources. Gold is the most important resource, and is the only resource which can be stockpiled., et al
 * Would it be alright to have just a single citation, say in the headline or such, for the manual, and consider that it "counts" for the whole section? Because, obviously, the source for gameplay is the manual... don't know how else to do it, short of sourcing every sentance. --VPeric 23:14, 20 January 2007 (UTC)
 * Sources at the end of paragraphs is fine. Dåvid ƒuchs  (talk &bull; contribs) 23:19, 20 January 2007 (UTC)


 * overall a good start. Keep it up! Dåvid ƒuchs  (talk &bull; contribs) 23:05, 20 January 2007 (UTC)
 * Thanks a lot for the review! Much appreciated! --VPeric 23:14, 20 January 2007 (UTC)
 * No prob. I'll look forward to seeing this at WP:GAC soon enough. Dåvid ƒuchs  (talk &bull; contribs) 23:19, 20 January 2007 (UTC)