Talk:Going Under/GA1

The following discussion is closed. Please do not modify it. Subsequent comments should be made on the appropriate discussion page. No further edits should be made to this discussion.

GA Review[edit]

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Reviewer: Aoba47 (talk · contribs) 17:31, 17 January 2018 (UTC)[reply]

Grabbing this for review. Will get to it later in the week. Most likely either tomorrow (i.e. Thursday) or Friday if that is okay with you. Aoba47 (talk) 17:31, 17 January 2018 (UTC)[reply]

~~Count me in as someone who will help upon request.~~ dannymusiceditor ^{Speak up!} 18:59, 17 January 2018 (UTC)[reply]

Thank you! Aoba47 (talk) 22:01, 17 January 2018 (UTC)[reply]

Actually, I'll just do it myself. Noticed the nominator hasn't been here in weeks. dannymusiceditor ^{Speak up!} 02:03, 18 January 2018 (UTC)[reply]

Thank you picking it up! Aoba47 (talk) 02:08, 18 January 2018 (UTC)[reply]

Lead and infobox

I would include that the song is nu metal in the prose of the lead. Currently, it is only present in the infobox.
For this part (Lyrically, "Going Under" talks about an), I would use a different verb other than “talks”. I have been given this note in the past that it is not an appropriate verb in the context of song lyrics since songs cannot really “talk” persay.
For this sentence (The singer designed both of the dresses she wears in the video herself.), I do not think that the final “herself” is necessary.

Background and composition

Pleae include the year in which Fallen was released on the first mention.
For this sentence ("Going Under" was initially supposed to be released as the first single from Fallen but its release got scrapped in favor of "Bring Me to Life".), I would say “it was scrapped in favor of” to avoid using the word “release” multiple times in the same sentence.

Critical reception

I think that this subsection could use more structure. Right now, it appears more like a random assortment of critics and their quotes and opinions on the song. This subsection would benefit from having a more cohesive narrative. I would use this resource (Wikipedia:Copyediting reception sections) to see what I mean about this. I will look over this subsection again when you have revised it further.

Commercial performance

In this sentence (Elsewhere, the single managed to enter the top thirty in various countries across Europe.), I do not think that the “Elsewhere,” part is necessary so I would remove it.

Music video

The image requires ALT text
Since the image caption (and by extension the image’s rationale) is related to the corset, I would choose an image that better shows the corset for the reader. In the current image, you really cannot see any of it. If you cannot find a better image of the corset, then I would suggest replacing it with a different part of the music video.
For this part (in Los Angeles, California which was the), I would add a comma after “California”.
For this part (according to her it was something "someone who died would wear”.), add a comma after “her”.

Live performances and usage in media

Great work here.

External links

I do not think that the link to the band’s official website is needed for this article.

Final thoughts

Great work with this article. I will pass this after my comments are addressed. I very much enjoyed reading this article as this is one of my favorite songs by this band. Aoba47 (talk) 00:32, 18 January 2018 (UTC)[reply]

How do you like it, Aoba47? dannymusiceditor ^{Speak up!} 02:52, 18 January 2018 (UTC)[reply]

Music video screenshot

@DannyMusicEditor: Everything almost looks good to go. Thank you for addressing my comments so quickly. I agree with a majority of the edits, but I will have to put my foot down though about the image. I saw your edit summary on it, and I understand your point of view, though, you must remember that things regarding non-free media (i.e. a music video screenshot) get a lot of scrutiny and need to be air tight in terms of its use and contributions to the overall article. I think that the idea for the image is appropriate as it is used to illustrate the corset that is discussed in outside sources. However, the corset in question is not visible at all. Yes, you can see the top of it (very little of it though), but not enough to illustrate the price tag attached to it.
I would suggest that you do one of the following three options: 1) exchange the image for one that actually shows the corset as suggested above, 2) exchange the image for an image of the white dress as that also received attention in outside source, or 3) just remove the image altogether. It is really up to you on this, but something about it will need to be done. If you choose to keep a music video screenshot in the article, then I would suggest filling out all of the data associated with it to make its use in the article clear. I hate to be strict about this, but use of non-free media is rather strict policy. Aoba47 (talk) 03:00, 18 January 2018 (UTC)[reply]

Done dannymusiceditor ^{Speak up!} 03:54, 18 January 2018 (UTC)[reply]

Verdict

Thank you for addressing everything. I will ✓ Pass this. Aoba47 (talk) 04:41, 18 January 2018 (UTC)[reply]

The discussion above is closed. Please do not modify it. Subsequent comments should be made on the appropriate discussion page. No further edits should be made to this discussion.