Talk:Roy Sakuma

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{{No Point of View|28=November 2023}}[edit]

Despite there being a tag on this article, not POV has been posted 2600:8807:88C6:800:35CF:35A4:5E54:74AC (talk) 18:32, 28 November 2023 (UTC)[reply]

Hi. I added the tag. Passages like:

"Sakuma would dream of showcasing the ukulele's versatility and virtuosity with a free concert in the park with the noble goal of ensuring the world would come to love the ukulele. This was at a time when the ukulele was thought of as a toy and everyone wanted to play the guitar. Under the guidance of mentor and friend, Moroni Medeiros at City Hall, Roy presented the world's first and original ukulele festival with the support of sponsors, local musicians, volunteers and friends"

"In the 1960's, as America latched onto the larger, louder, more swaggering guitar, Hawaii's little instrument was relegated to the attic. The ukulele was in near oblivion. Very few people were interested in the ukulele. But Roy Sakuma knew the instrument's true worth and refused to forsake the ukulele"

are clearly not neutral. The article will require quite a deep rewrite. AntiDionysius (talk) 18:35, 28 November 2023 (UTC)[reply]
Hi,
Do you think adding the citations for the passages will suffice? TIA! 2600:8807:88C6:800:ADA4:3184:3BDB:8EE7 (talk) 00:17, 29 November 2023 (UTC)[reply]
More citations is always good; but the problem is about the writing and use of language, which isn't fixed merely by the addition of citations. AntiDionysius (talk) 10:57, 29 November 2023 (UTC)[reply]

Thank you for your response. What would need to happen to position the article for a tag removal? And would you be willing to assist with that? After reading through some of the policies I now understand that those affiliated with the company are not allowed to directly edit, but may make suggestions through the "talk page". — Preceding unsigned comment added by RoySakumaUkulele (talkcontribs) 14:59, 29 November 2023 (UTC)[reply]

Aloha, I'd like to submit an edit to the current first paragraph.
Currently it reads as:
Roy Sakuma (born Jan 22, 1947) is a Hawaiian ukulele teacher and has been credited with making the ukulele renaissance possible.[according to whom?] Roy Sakuma is the founder of the Ukulele Festival, the world's first and original ukulele festival, which celebrated its 50th anniversary in 2020.
Here is my proposed change with sources for info at the bottom.
Roy Sakuma (born Jan 22, 1947) is regarded as one of the most influential ukulele teachers ever, credited for sparking new generations of ukulele players and virtuosos like Jake Shimabukuro who got his start as a young student at Roy Sakuma Studios. [1][2]  Sakuma launched what is considered to be the first major ukulele festival in 1971, an annual event in Honolulu that continued for 52 years. [3]
He is well known in Hawaii for creating the Roy Sakuma Method, an alphabet-based ukulele instructional course that simplified how students read—and play—music. [4]
References:
1.     "For Five Decades Roy and Kathy Sakuma Have Championed Hawaiian Ukulele." www.ukulelemag.com. 28 April 2021. Retrieved 12-07-2023.
2.     Tranquada, Jim (2012). The Ukulele: a History. University of Hawaii Press. ISBN 978-0-8248-3544-6.
3.    "Ukulele Festival Hawaii announces its final year in 2022". KITV 4 Island Television. Retrieved 28 March 2023.
4.    Lopes, Shawn. “No Sweat, No Fret.” Honolulu Star-Bulletin. July 22, 2004. Retrieved 01-09-2024 via Newspapers.com RoySakumaUkulele (talk) 14:08, 4 March 2024 (UTC)[reply]
I would also like to submit edits on March 25, 2004 which will affect the following:
1. 2nd neutrality issue [fact or opinion?] found in 'Beginnings' section
2. Change 'Beginnings' header to 'Biography'
3. Add additional cited information to the section
4. Merge what used to be under 'Personal' into the Biography section
I will leave the article unedited for two weeks, to allow for feedback to my proposal. I will submit the edits on the article on Mar 25, 2024, if there are no conflicts.
Currently it reads as:
== Beginnings ==
In the 1960's, as America latched onto the larger, louder, more swaggering[fact or opinion?] guitar, Hawaii's little instrument was relegated to the attic. The ukulele was in near oblivion. Very few people were interested in the ukulele. But Roy Sakuma knew the instrument's true worth and refused to forsake the ukulele. After all, it had turned his young life around. Roy grew up in a home with mental illness. His mother suffered from paranoid schizophrenia, his brother suffered from the same illness and committed suicide. By the age of 14, confused by his home life and the teasing by his peers about his congenital ear deformity, Roy dropped out of school. Then he heard the hit song, “Sushi”, on the radio by ukulele virtuoso Herb “Ohta-San” Ohta, the most prolific ukulele recording artist of his time. "Sushi" was the #1 song for two weeks in Hawaii and also featured on Dick Clark's American Bandstand. Sakuma sought him out and became an avid student. Under the guidance and mentorship of Ohta-San, a whole new world direction and discipline opened up to him. Roy quickly proved himself a stellar student, practicing eight to ten hours a day and set out to become the best ukulele player in the world. Then Ohta-San asked him to teach his classes while he went on a concert tour in Japan.
Sakuma discovered that his true calling was not in performing but in teaching and sharing the joy of the ukulele.
== Personal life ==
On October 24, 1976, Roy married Kathy Kawano. Together they have dedicated their lives to spreading the joy of the ukulele, preserving interest in the ukulele, and sharing their message of laughter, love, and hope.
They see a need for students to not only know the music of the ukulele, but to be healed and whole as they face struggles in their lives. Roy Sakuma volunteers his time speaking to school children, sharing candidly about his life experiences regarding mental illness, bullying, suicide, overcoming insecurity.
He teaches his song, "I Am What I Am", composed when he was a confused and broken teenager. He shares the meaning of the song about accepting and being ourselves and that our weaknesses are there to help us find inner strength.
Here is my proposed changes with sources info at bottom:
== Biography ==
Born in Hawaii, Sakuma grew up in a family challenged by mental illness. His mother had paranoid schizophrenia, as did his brother who died when he was 27 of an apparent suicide.[5][6] Roy Sakuma was kicked out of high school, but found a mentor in ukulele master Herb Ohta, known professionally as Ohta-san and Sakuma became a stellar student.[7] After nearly two years, he became a substitute teacher for Ohta-san’s ukulele classes and then became an instructor.[8]
In the early 1970s, Sakuma began work for the City and County of Honolulu as a groundskeeper at Kapiolani Park where he got the idea to launch the first annual Ukulele Festival in 1971.[9] Sakuma, under the guidance of his mentor Moroni Medeiros, culture and arts coordinator with Honolulu Department of Parks and Recreation, lined up the Hawaii International Ukulele Club and the City & County of Honolulu to sponsor that first free concert.[9] He also volunteered at the nearby Jefferson Elementary School, teaching ukulele classes to students with learning—and physical—disabilities.
Sakuma taught for Ohta-san and Kamaka Ukulele until 1974 when he launched Roy Sakuma Ukulele Studios in Kaimuki. Since then, three additional studio locations opened throughout Oahu. Sakuma’s former students are hired help teach classes.[10]
Sakuma married Kathy Kawano Oct. 24, 1976. They have worked together ever since, focusing on on teaching ukulele lessons and preserving interest in the ukulele with a mission of sharing the message of laughter, love, and hope through the instrument.
Roy Sakuma is invited to speak to students about mental health, bullying, and overcoming insecurities. He often closes his talks by teaching the song he wrote, "I Am What I Am,” about self-acceptance.[11]
1.    Wilcox, Leslie."Long Story Short: PBS Interviews Roy Sakuma." Pbshawaii.org.
2.    “Patient, 27, Dies in Fall from Hotel.” Honolulu Star-Bulletin. September 13, 1966. Retrieved 2024-01-09 – via Newspapers.com
3.    Ohta, Herb Jr. “Appreciation of History: Roy Sakuma.” herbohtajr.com/history/roysakuma.html
4.    Dingeman, Robbie. “Roy Sakuma Always Attuned to Teaching.” Honolulu Advertiser. May 9, 2010. Retrieved 01-09-2024 – via Newspapers.com
5.    Berger, John. “Strumming the Final Chords.” Honolulu Advertiser. July 10, 2022. Retrieved 01-10-24 – via Newspapers.com
6.    Arcayna, Nancy.”Hope & Song.” Honolulu Star-Bulletin. June 9, 2008. 01-10-2024 – via Newspapers.com
7.    "50th Anniversary of Ukulele Festival Hawaii". Hawaii News Now. Retrieved 28 March 2023. RoySakumaUkulele (talk) 16:30, 11 March 2024 (UTC)[reply]
My apologies...
I noticed that the footnotes do not match what is in the article. Here are the footnotes with the correct corresponding numbers.
5. Wilcox, Leslie."Long Story Short: PBS Interviews Roy Sakuma." Pbshawaii.org.
6. “Patient, 27, Dies in Fall from Hotel.” Honolulu Star-Bulletin. September 13, 1966. Retrieved 2024-01-09 – via Newspapers.com
7. Ohta, Herb Jr. “Appreciation of History: Roy Sakuma.” herbohtajr.com/history/roysakuma.html
8. Dingeman, Robbie. “Roy Sakuma Always Attuned to Teaching.” Honolulu Advertiser. May 9, 2010. Retrieved 01-09-2024 – via Newspapers.com
9. Berger, John. “Strumming the Final Chords.” Honolulu Advertiser. July 10, 2022. Retrieved 01-10-24 – via Newspapers.com'
10. Arcayna, Nancy.”Hope & Song.” Honolulu Star-Bulletin. June 9, 2008. 01-10-2024 – via Newspapers.com'
11. "50th Anniversary of Ukulele Festival Hawaii". Hawaii News Now. Retrieved 28 March 2023.' RoySakumaUkulele (talk) 14:21, 22 March 2024 (UTC)[reply]

Will edit as proposed above. Will continue to edit to remove NPOV and removed unquoted flowery content. Awards and Honors to be included. Currently the fact or opinion issue and according to who issue have been addressed. Thank you. — Preceding unsigned comment added by RoySakumaUkulele (talkcontribs) 13:53, 26 March 2024 (UTC)[reply]

{{Removal of NPOV tag|28=November 2023}}[edit]

Removing NPOV tag 2600:8807:88C6:800:35CF:35A4:5E54:74AC (talk) 18:32, 28 November 2023 (UTC)[reply]

Submission request to remove NPOV tag, due to fact or opinion issue and according to who issue resolved. As well as flowery content removed. References have been updated to more reliable sources as well. — Preceding unsigned comment added by RoySakumaUkulele (talkcontribs) 14:46, 26 March 2024 (UTC)[reply]