Talk:The Boat Race 1858/GA1

GA Review[edit]

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Reviewer: Ritchie333 (talk · contribs) 12:29, 25 December 2014 (UTC)[reply]

While the turkey is cooling and the sprouts are on the boil, I'll quickly review this

Lead[edit]

"The race" - might be better to say "The 1858 race", "this race" or something that clearly states the sentence is talking about this one, as the previous sentence is a general description of the race over all years
I think I found the bit you're concerned over, but please correct me (or the article) if I'm wrong! The Rambling Man (talk) 21:12, 25 December 2014 (UTC)[reply]

No, I meant the start of the third sentence of the lead. I've tweaked it to what I meant. Your fix in the body is okay as well. Ritchie333 ^(talk) ^(cont) 11:05, 26 December 2014 (UTC)[reply]

Race[edit]

"Commencing at 1pm ... " - I've never really been a fan of sentences that start with the present participle myself, wouldn't "The race started at 1pm" (with relevant grammar changes) be better?
Ok, me neither. Adjusted. The Rambling Man (talk) 21:12, 25 December 2014 (UTC)[reply]
I'm wondering if it would be worth adding a brief phrase explaining what "caught a crab" is. I realise there is a wikilink, but it's to part of an article, rather than an article itself, and on a mobile device a reader might just see the link, assume it goes to the creature, and think "huh"?
Now then, this is a tricky one, I could add a footnote I suppose, but otherwise I'd need to be explaining this term in multiple articles which is supposed to be being served by the glossary of terms. What would you suggest? The Rambling Man (talk) 21:12, 25 December 2014 (UTC)[reply]
I did add a reference to an article describing the origins of the term, if that helps? The Rambling Man (talk) 08:01, 26 December 2014 (UTC)[reply]
Yes, I think that's the best we can do under the circumstances. I had a quick look around for sources, but there's not enough online to obviously make catch a crab an article on its own, so a redirect is the strongest compromise between everything. Ritchie333 ^(talk) ^(cont) 11:05, 26 December 2014 (UTC)[reply]
"and shot Hammersmith Bridge with a length-and-a-half lead" - not sure if "shot" is the right word, it makes it sound a bit too much like Radio 4's Test Match Special commentary rather than an encyclopaedia
Oddly, to "shoot a bridge" is common parlance with rowing. I could "blanderate" it to become "pass under" if you prefer, but shooting bridges is what we did/they do.... The Rambling Man (talk) 21:12, 25 December 2014 (UTC)[reply]
I'm sure it is common parlance, but it never hurts to writing for the opponent (eg: Randy in Boise AfDing the article with a rationale of "non notible [sic] race between 2 skools"). Let's go with "pass under" Ritchie333 ^(talk) ^(cont) 11:05, 26 December 2014 (UTC)[reply]
Mortlake can be wikilinked
So linked. The Rambling Man (talk) 21:12, 25 December 2014 (UTC)[reply]

Summary[edit]

Just minor things, as expected. I'll put the review on hold now as the sprouts are nearly done and I need to make the gravy. Ritchie333 ^(talk) ^(cont) 12:29, 25 December 2014 (UTC)[reply]
Thanks Ritchie, hope the sprouts were awesome, the turkey more so. Glad tidings. The Rambling Man (talk) 21:12, 25 December 2014 (UTC)[reply]
I have had a bad case of overdosing on Terry's Chocolate Orange, anyway all issues are resolved so I can now pass this. Time for a Boxing Day walk, I think. Ritchie333 ^(talk) ^(cont) 11:05, 26 December 2014 (UTC)[reply]