User talk:Bdhillon94
| This user is a student editor in University_of_Central_Florida_College_of_Medicine/WikiProject_Medicine_Fall_2020_UCF_COM_(Block_6) . |
Welcome![edit]
Hello, Bdhillon94, and welcome to Wikipedia! My name is Ian and I work with Wiki Education; I help support students who are editing as part of a class assignment.
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If you have any questions, please don't hesitate to contact me on my talk page. Ian (Wiki Ed) (talk) 18:04, 23 October 2020 (UTC)
"Strabismus surgery" Peer Review[edit]
Overall: Great article, I definitely learned some new things! I thought it was pretty well-balanced and organized, nice and succinct. I felt like for the most part, the audience was geared to the common layman, although there were some sentences that could use more definitions to make it easier to understand (see below). I felt the tone was neutral throughout and I didn't feel like there was an emphasis on any particular technique; any "controversial" findings were qualified with "further investigation is needed." The sources were all great academic sources; my only concern is that you used some primary sources, like the one for mitomycin and amniotic membrane to reduce fibrosis, which although made the article very interesting for me as a med student, might be better to leave out for the Wiki article. I like the surgical images, but one useful image would be a diagram of the rectus and obliques since they are the main topics of strabismus surgery, if you could find that.
Lead: Nice and succinct
History: Very interesting, I like this section
Indications: Currently you have PD defined in "Techniques," but since you mention PD here first I would define it here. Otherwise good summary.
Techniques: The image of the rectus and oblique muscles would be useful here. Otherwise, excellent summaries of the different procedures. It's not bogged down with too many details.
Outcomes: I feel like there can be some more definitions included here, like vertical deviation, cylodeviation, and A and V patterns just to make it more understandable for the average reader.
Complications: This section can be expanded a little more with sources, it feels short compared to the other sections. Especially how it ends with "life-threatening complications" without further explanation, maybe explain the complications from the ouclocardiac reflex and if you can find a source for how often that actually happens? I know finding sources for complications are hard though!