User talk:Metal Linx/sandbox

Feedback on Project Proposal[edit]

This is a really important topic and it looks like the article could use a lot of work, so I'm glad you decided to go with it. Your bibliography looks good so far, but obviously there are many more sources you could turn to if you find there are areas you want to flesh out further. Are you particularly interested in the issue of the unborn in Japanese mythology/religion? I only ask because the Sasson and Law book seems a bit narrowly-focused for this project, but if it has useful background information (or if you can justify adding content about this specific topic), there's nothing wrong with it as a source.

Some things that stand out to me as lacking in the existing Wikipedia article:

Authorship - who wrote the Kojiki and why? We do have some answers to these questions, but they're not reflected in the article.
More on the writing system used?
Its relationship to the Nihon Shoki?
More on Motoori Norinaga's study of the text (actually a very important topic in the scholarship on Japanese history)
Because of the nature of this class, perhaps a section on the Kojiki in pop culture?

Ctextor at uofu (talk) 21:08, 26 February 2018 (UTC)[reply]

Roxanne's Peer Review[edit]

It looks like you fleshed this article out a lot more, which is great! The Kojiki is such a huge and important text that it's pretty weird the article has been so lacking. I like that you added sections on the Creation of the Kojiki and the Imperial use of it, and the list of contents is really great; it must have taken ages to write it all out and link everything. I do have a few suggestions, so here they are:

There could possibly be a couple more links to important things in the body text, like the Jinshin Rebellion in the section on Imperial use of the Kojiki, for example.
"Imperial Purpose of the Kojiki" sounds a little odd to me, so possibly consider changing it to something like "Imperial Use of the Kojiki".
Possibly re-format the contents of the Kojiki so that the main chapters/sections within each of the volumes stand out a bit more. You could bold them perhaps, or change them to sub-headers.

I also noticed a couple of typos, so be sure to copyedit carefully! EX: "whether or true or not" in section Imperial Purpose of the Kojiki

Other than that, it looks great!! Nice work!!

Roxanne Fitzwilliam (talk) 04:44, 7 April 2018 (UTC)[reply]

Thanks for the feedback Roxanne!

I agree that a link to the Jinshin Rebellion would be nice, but the original reason it wasn't there was that no page exists for it! I have added a red link though as it is definitely something there should be at least a stub page on.
I have changed the title from "Imperial" to "Political" as suggested by yourself and Ctextor
I bolded the sections you suggested--making them subheadings increased the size and made the emperor names look even more extremely long!

Metal Linx (talk) 02:45, 13 April 2018 (UTC)[reply]

CT Feedback[edit]

This looks excellent. I agree with Roxanne that maybe there is a better title for the "Imperial Purpose of the Kojiki" section, perhaps something like "Political Purpose of the Kojiki"? Ctextor at uofu (talk) 14:41, 10 April 2018 (UTC)[reply]

Peer Review - Isenhour[edit]

This is fantastic! Your additions to the article are interesting and well fleshed out.

I agree with Roxanne that the "Contents of the Text" section could use a little format change to make the separation of main chapters and their sections clearer.

You have done an amazing amount of work to improve this article, and it really shows! Great Job!