Wikipedia:Featured article candidates/His Band and the Street Choir/archive2

The following is an archived discussion of a featured article nomination. Please do not modify it. Subsequent comments should be made on the article's talk page or in Wikipedia talk:Featured article candidates. No further edits should be made to this page.

The article was not promoted by SandyGeorgia 23:24, 22 June 2010 [1].

His Band and the Street Choir[edit]

Nominator(s): Kitchen Roll (Exchange words) 18:09, 7 June 2010 (UTC)[reply]

I am nominating this for featured article because I nominated it before but the general consensus was it needed a copyedit. Now the article's been copyedited I'd like to renominate it. Thanks Kitchen Roll (Exchange words) 18:09, 7 June 2010 (UTC)[reply]

Comment—no dab links, no dead external links. Ucucha 18:12, 7 June 2010 (UTC)[reply]

Sources issues

~~What makes http://www.oocities.com/sfloman/vanmorrison.html#3 a reliable source?~~

~~There are several formatting problems in your references list.~~
- ~~The Dave Marsh site is a subscription service and should be marked (subscription required)~~

Otherwise sources look OK. Brianboulton (talk) 10:53, 8 June 2010 (UTC)[reply]

Scott Floman, writer of the oocities review, is a music critic for Goldmine (magazine): http://sfloman.com/faq.html; http://www.disclaimerband.com/musiclinks.html. I've fixed the sourcing issues appart from the Alfred Music Publishing date which isn't listed on the publication. Kitchen Roll (Exchange words) 12:14, 9 June 2010 (UTC)[reply]

I have fixed the formats of the first two references; the Unterberger entry looks in need of attention. According to Abebooks the publication year for the Alfred Music Publishing version of the anthology is 1999. Brianboulton (talk) 10:50, 10 June 2010 (UTC)[reply]

I've added the date and changed the Unterberger ref title. Cheers Kitchen Roll (Exchange words) 10:56, 10 June 2010 (UTC)[reply]

Comment—Some of the sources used do not check out for the material that is referenced. References cited in books by Heylin & Hinton in particular. I don't have all of the books so don't know if other book sourced material is accurate or not. The information is embellished or changed in context from that cited on the book's page number . See my comment on article talk page. Agadant (talk) 12:28, 8 June 2010 (UTC)[reply]

I see what the problem is. As the article has progressed the infomation and sources have been moved around so the right infommation is referenced by the wrong source. I think I've fixed the problem. Kitchen Roll (Exchange words) 12:14, 9 June 2010 (UTC)[reply]

Comments –

"As of 2010, It remains Morrison's most successful single of his solo career." Why is "It" capitalized? Oh, and while I'm here, I think a less wordy version would be "As of 2010, it remains the most successful single of Morrison's solo career."
Recording: "The backing vocal trio of Emily Houston, Judy Clay and Jackie Verdell also returned in order sing on 'If I Ever Needed Someone'." Missing "to". Also, I don't think "in order" is needed here; you can just go with "returned to sing on...".
Composition: Around reference 25, there is a space between an apostrophe and a quotation mark. Is this intentional?
I'm a little uncomfortable with the first part of the "catchy gospel-style composition" bit. The word "catchy" sounds like someone's opinion. Would it be possible to offer some attribution for this?
"Writer Brian Hinton described the lyrics of the song are 'perversely bitter'." "are" → "as".
Packaging: No hyphen after ly- (such as "incorrectly-ordered") unless there is a compounding element.
Chart performance: De-capitalize The in "The Netherlands". Giants2008 (27 and counting) 00:32, 22 June 2010 (UTC)[reply]

Thanks for your comments. I've fixed all the issues raised. Kitchen Roll (Exchange words) 08:12, 22 June 2010 (UTC)[reply]

The above discussion is preserved as an archive. Please do not modify it. No further edits should be made to this page.