Wikipedia:Peer review/Centrum Arena (Prestwick)/archive1

Centrum Arena (Prestwick)[edit]

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This peer review discussion has been closed.
I've listed this article for peer review because… I expanded the article from a stub. I've put alot of work into it and feel that it could be worthy of GA status. I would also like some feedback on the article so I can possibly make some improvements.

Many Thanks, Il cacciatore (talk) 20:19, 19 November 2011 (UTC)[reply]

Comments from Jappalang

The lede (opening/very first section of the article) is a summary of the key points in the main article text (WP:LEDE). The current single-sentence lede is too short and does not summarize what is key.

It seems the article is divided into too many sections (as supported by the presence of several sections as being only of a one- or two-sentence paragraph). Judging from the available content so far, they can be merged into three sections: History, Operation, and Closure.

The language is flawed. The single sentence in The Site is awkward in construction, there is a period between "Chinese State Circus" and "and roller hockey", and errors such as "policy TOUR3" seem obvious.

Several statements in this article are uncited.

The Demolition section is over-detailed; when compared to the rest of the article, it becomes of undue weight.

The current section headers violate the Manual of Style. Section headers should not be in title case, but in sentence case; i.e. only the first letter of the header is capitalized.

There is no reason for Ayr Bruins and Ayr Raiders to be in See also. They are not related to the stadium in any way. Ayr Scottish Eagles and Ice Hockey Superleague should also not be there; they are already noted and linked in the main article text. In short, See also is not needed.

Wikipedia articles should not be used as sources, as what was done with Ayr Scottish Eagles in this article. If an information from another article is to be used, cite the actual source from which that information came from.

What makes http://www.hotfrog.co.uk/Companies/Tholos-Bar a reliable source, especially when anyone can "add your business" and key in any sort of information?

The citing is also somewhat haphazard; it is before a punctuation, after a punctuation, between two periods, or has a space before it. Please be proper and consistent.

File:Centrum last game.jpg is a copyright violation.

File:Centrum Arena.png: What sources did Martin Le Roy use to reconstruct the structure? Without indicating those sources, how can one verify that his computer generation is accurate in detail?

The main issue is that actual meaty information about the subject is quite sparse here and is not presented in the best manner. Consolidate them (like in the suggested three sections above) and think how to present the stadium in a encyclopaedic manner (How did it come about? What happened in it? How did it fail? When did it close? What happened after it closed?). Jappalang (talk) 05:43, 25 November 2011 (UTC)[reply]

Thank you very much for the peer review. I have amended the article in light of your comments and suggestions. Many thanks (Il cacciatore (talk) 23:43, 26 November 2011 (UTC))[reply]