Wikipedia:Peer review/Qaumi Tarana/archive1

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Qaumi Tarana[edit]

I've listed this article for peer review because it has reached what I feel is the best it could be given the dearth of reliable information on the topic. In particular, I'd like the article to be checked for neutrality and grammar, and whether it is heading in the right direction for good article status.

Thanks,

Green Giant (talk) 18:18, 11 December 2007 (UTC)[reply]

Comments by Ilse@[edit]

Some comments about the article:

  • I think the article is not really about the flag of Pakistan or Muhammad Ali Jinnah. I'd suggest you remove these images and move up the other images of the lyrics and the sheet music. If available, you could use portraits of the authors of the national anthem.
  • I think you don't need the "See also" section for this article. I would suggest you'd remove it entirely.
  • You could wikilink some dates that give context, see Wikipedia:Context and Wikipedia:Manual of Style (dates) for more info.
  • I think you should, generally, wikilink more words in the article that are relevant to its topic, such as the words "music" and "lyrics" in the lead.
  • I am not sure the lead section is a good stand alone summary of the article. I'd suggest you make sure all information in the lead section is also in the article, then delete the lead and write a new section that summarizes the complete article. See for more info Wikipedia:Lead section.
  • I noticed that not all facts in the article have references.

Success with the article! – Ilse@ 22:23, 11 December 2007 (UTC)[reply]

  • A script has been used to generate a semi-automated review of the article for issues relating to grammar and house style. If you would find such a review helpful, please click here. Thanks, APR t 15:38, 12 December 2007 (UTC)[reply]