Wikipedia:WikiProject Military history/Peer review/152 mm howitzer M1943 (D-1)

152 mm howitzer M1943 (D-1)[edit]

A common effort of a group of editors. We'd like to get some comments and suggestions concerning further improvement of the article. Bukvoed 08:29, 27 May 2007 (UTC)[reply]

Kirill Lokshin[edit]

Not bad, overall, but some points that still need work:

The lead could stand to be longer; two or three paragraphs is pretty much the norm now.
The "Production" section is really too short to stand on its own; it may be better off to absorb it into the previous one (as "Development and production").
The "Summary" section is out of place; parts of it should be in the lead, while some of the more technical details would be better off in the description of the gun itself.
An explicit "Trivia" section is unacceptable. While some of these points are interesting, they should be worked into the text itself (as footnotes, if needed).
The "Surviving pieces" section should be converted into prose (a sentence or two, at most) and ideally absorbed into one of the larger sections ("Organization and employment", perhaps).

Kirill Lokshin 11:32, 31 May 2007 (UTC)[reply]

Thanks. We reworked the article, taking these remarks into account. Bukvoed 07:53, 3 June 2007 (UTC)[reply]