Wikipedia:WikiProject Rugby league/Peer review/Joel Clinton

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Joel Clinton[edit]

Done heaps of work on Joel's page, I reckon it deserves a B-class Joelclintonfan 13:13, 1 June 2007 (UTC)[reply]

Review by SpecialWindler[edit]

Some pointers to get it to B-class.

  • The first sentence should read
    • Joel Clinton (born ?? in Hornsby...) is a rugby league player...
  • The lead should be longer to suit the size of the article.
  • The "Playing Career" section is messed up. It should be in order of what he did (for example the 2008 move to the broncos is not before the 2006 or 2007 season.
  • Your citations are wrong
  • Does the sections "That Tackle" and "That Try" really have to be there. They should be summarised into one sentence (each) and put in their respective years.
  • The article is a little biased to the 2006 and 2007 seasons, what did he do 2003-2005 and his junior career.
  • How did Joel Clinton help the Panthers get from last place in 2001 to premiers in 2003.
  • You don't need the See Also section.
  • The "Personal Life" section shouldn't have sub sections. It can all be just information in 2 or 3 paragraphs.
  • Although the table in the "2007 season" section is great, it makes it biased to other seasons and by the end of the NRL Season, there will be a long table with basically information on it. You would be better to make a Season Stats table with only the tables season.
  • You need a source/citation for the some of the claims (eg. the contreversy over him not being picked for NSW in 2004)
  • The graph of Clinton's Metres gained and tackles isn't really necassary.
  • The quote in the section "That Try", state who said it (not in italics).
  • Categories have to be in alphebetical order, (numbers then letters)
  • For the infobox
    • Use the template {{birth date and age}} for his Date of Birth Section
    • Can the city of birth and Australia be wikilinked.
    • You don't need the New South Wales bit for the place of birth
    • Can you source his nickname, height, weight

Thats a quick review to get some simple mistakes out. I can re-review it again for you, if you have changed the page dramatically. Contact me if you want this. I will alert you on your talk page, I have reviewed it.

SpecialWindler 01:23, 2 June 2007 (UTC)[reply]

New Note: I have done the infobox section for you. I have stricked it out. SpecialWindler 09:35, 2 June 2007 (UTC)[reply]

Second Review by SpecialWindler[edit]

A more notes due to me being bored.

  • You have a lot of biased statements. Below are all I can find
    • Standing at 197 cm and 108 kg, Clinton is a big piece of the Penrith Panthers' forward pack.
    • he helped the Panthers come from last place in 2001 to become Minor Premiers and eventual premiers in 2003.
    • so it came as a shock to many when Joel was overlooked for selection for NSW in all three games of the 2004 State of Origin series."
    • ability to brush off the hit left Woolford claiming the high tackle wasn't that serious.
    • conceding tries while Clinton was off the field.
    • Joel Clinton made international headlines
    • Considered one of the fastest men in the NRL over one hundred metres, Williams was running for a game-changing four points. Instead, Clinton single-handedly reversed the momentum of the match. This allowed Panthers winger Michael Gordon to score in the final minute, giving the Panthers an unlikely win.
    • Clinton's level of fitness is also at an all time high,
  • Panthers rhetoric had suggested What does that mean?
  • There, he is expected to fill the big shoes of retired Shane Webcke. Elaborate more, Shane Webcke retired in 06 and I know what you mean (going for the Broncos' myself) but how does he. What expectation is on him.
  • Manly five-eighth Travis Burns branded Joel Clinton as "childish" and a "bad sport" for allegedly squirting him with a water bottle while lining up a match-winning penalty goal in Round 20 (23 July, 2006). Put the date first.
  • Joel Clinton made international headlines Prove they made international headlines.
  • Link problem NRL season 2004|2004]]
  • Instead, Clinton single-handedly reversed the momentum of the match. How?
  • In the 2007 section, you don't have to elaborate of every game he played and it often gets repetitive with the "In round 1 .. In round 7" at the start of paragraphs
  • Clinton also broke his season long try scoring drought. The season only has been going for 9 rounds and prop forwards don't score to many tries so, why does this statement need to be there.
  • Solely chasing a mediocre kick, the bounce of the ball confused Cowboys winger Brenton Bowen, allowing Joel to gather and score in the corner. Prove Brenton Bowen was confused
  • You have a few quotes in the article. Who said them, some person down the street, you or a coach/player/commentator. I do hope it the third one and may I suggest you use {{Quote box}} to show some of your quotes. Like used on Karmichael Hunt.

SpecialWindler 09:43, 15 June 2007 (UTC)[reply]

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