Talk:2010 Sylvania 300

Some questions while I copyedit
In the second paragraph of the lead, Bowyer "who led the most laps in the race with 176". Knowing nothing about Nascar, it's unclear what this is intended to mean.

Did he...
 * have the most completed laps in the race at the time he took the lead?
 * have the most completed laps in the race at the time he took the lead and also at the end of the race?
 * win the race immediately because of that?
 * win the race later because of that?
 * something else?

Secondly, 3.677 million watched on television. As I assume this is a rating based on surveys etc, I am very uncomfortable with the three digits after the decimal point, implying precision to the extent of reasonable certainty that there were no less than 3,676,500 people and no more than 3,677,500 watching on TV. Although there might be an argument for having it consistent with other articles on similar events if they too imply this sort of precision in viewing figures, I'd be much happier with "3.67 million" unless there are strong objections.

I haven't actually checked MOS for how such numbers are expressed :)

(Or unless it is pay-per-view and the exact number of viewers is recorded, of course.)

--Demiurge1000 (talk) 10:54, 15 December 2010 (UTC)
 * For a response to the first one, it just tells us you led the most laps, such as Bowyer led 176 laps throughout the 300 lap event, or he was in the first position for 176 laps. So its none of your thoughts, which how it reads may be a little misleading.  Nascar  1996   15:03, 15 December 2010 (UTC)
 * For a response to the second one, I'm fine with it like that, the reference has all three digits, so I'm not clearly sure.  Nascar  1996   15:03, 15 December 2010 (UTC)
 * Thanks for explaining these. I am starting to understand more about NASCAR already!


 * I've completed my copyedit (although I may be tempted to do additional tweaks whenever the mood takes me). Note that my native language is British English, and of course since NASCAR occurs mostly only in the USA, the article should be in U.S. English. I can usually manage to correct myself into U.S. English; but it's worth someone quickly reading through the article, and also checking what I've done just to see if any obvious Britishisms stand out.


 * On a style issue, I've removed a fair number of commas, and also have used "took third position" instead of "took the third position" throughout. If the latter really is more natural U.S. English and the former sounds wrong to American ears, then let me know and I will change it back.


 * Some specifics:


 * In the infobox, "wind out of the NW at 3 mph" sounds slightly wrong to me. Is "out of..." the normal usage for this in the USA?
 * Yes, that means that the wind is coming out of the North West at 3 MPH. Nascar  1996   22:43, 16 December 2010 (UTC)
 * OK, so long as you're happy it sounds natural. --Demiurge1000 (talk) 23:49, 16 December 2010 (UTC)
 * I've changed 3.677 million to 3.68 million, throughout.
 * Okat thanks. Nascar  1996   22:43, 16 December 2010 (UTC)
 * I am worried that I may have made a sentence in the second paragraph of "Background", incorrect or nonsensical, due to an incomplete understanding of how the Chase for the Sprint Cup works. Your original had "Matt Kenseth and Clint Bowyer was also tied with 5,000 because of the Chase for the Sprint Cup reset." My replacement has "In the parallel Chase for the Sprint Cup, Matt Kenseth and Clint Bowyer both started with their points total reset to 5,000." The source does indeed list both these people as having 5000 points at that time, but it's really not clear to me whether they might have had more points in the overall championship and had them reduced (doesn't this unfairly disadvantage them?) or whether the 5000 points start only affects their Chase points, or what. The important thing is; does my replacement sentence both make sense for the reader, and describe the situation accurately.
 * Makes sense to me. It is also an advantage. By number of wins they are listed, then every win is worth ten points. Both had the same amount of wins so the same points.  Nascar  1996   22:43, 16 December 2010 (UTC)
 * In the fourth paragraph of the section "Race", it is stated that one driver "drove to the garage" and another "went to the garage". To British ears, this sounds slightly strange. Is it a NASCAR term that has an accepted meaning? Does it mean that they retired from the race, or that they had some sort of pit-stop related to mechanical defects rather than routine changes; or something else. The reason I ask is that I would be tempted to change one of those phrases for something slightly different, once I know what exactly is being referred to.
 * When someone drove to the garage they may be retired or they are fixing a problem so they can continue to race. Nascar  1996   22:49, 16 December 2010 (UTC)
 * OK thanks, I might tweak that slightly. --Demiurge1000 (talk) 23:49, 16 December 2010 (UTC)
 * In the ninth paragraph of the section "Race", it is mentioned that "the eighth and final caution came out". Is this 100% standard phrasing for NASCAR reporting? Without a background in it, I am guessing that what actually came out was the safety car, and what happened/occured/was announced, was the caution. If you agree, I'll rephrase it a bit.
 * You can rephrase a bit. It could just be named the eighth caution or final caution.  Nascar  1996   22:49, 16 December 2010 (UTC)
 * OK thanks, I will tweak that. --Demiurge1000 (talk) 23:49, 16 December 2010 (UTC)
 * In the first paragraph of the section "Post-race", Bowyer is quoted as saying, "I was really going to push him across." Quoting him is indeed essential, but what on earth is he talking about? Our readers deserve to be told who the "him" is, and not be left confused.
 * I believe he was talking about Tony Stewart.  Nascar  1996   22:49, 16 December 2010 (UTC)
 * I need more info here... I really don't understand what he is talking about. --Demiurge1000 (talk) 23:49, 16 December 2010 (UTC)
 * I've boldly replaced various occurences of things like "next, X said", "afterwards, Y commented on the race" in the section "post-race", with some rather weakly editorialising mumbling that characterises what they said. Please be sure to read over this and see if you're happy that it doesn't say too much that isn't either adequately backed by the cited sources, or totally reasonable commentary based on the quote itself.
 * I did, you did fine with it.  Nascar  1996   22:49, 16 December 2010 (UTC)
 * In the fifth paragraph of the section "Post-race", Tony Stewart reacted to the announcement by saying, "It's possible for sure." I am guessing that he was referring to the possibility of winning a race, several races, a championship, the chase sprint, or something else. But our readers should not be left wondering what he is talking about. What is he talking about - and is it something that ends at the end of 2010, or earlier, or later, or something else?
 * He was talking about the penalty.  Nascar  1996   22:49, 16 December 2010 (UTC)
 * I'm really interested in exactly what is "a possible". Unless you're sure that he was saying the penalty was possibly fair, then he's talking about something else. There is some context here that I'm missing. We could just miss out his first quoted sentence "it's a possible for sure", but I think it's better to understand it and explain it if we can. Any ideas what he means? --Demiurge1000 (talk) 23:49, 16 December 2010 (UTC)

Let me know what you think of each of these points (some are just for information, and can be ignored if they look fine to people who know the subject area better), and then we can do some final tweaks.
 * You may want to review that reference.  Nascar  1996   00:53, 17 December 2010 (UTC)

Don't view this as a good reason to think that to copyedit a NASCAR article you need someone who knows about NASCAR, or at least someone whose native language is U.S. English. By not knowing the intricacies of the subject matter, it has been so much easier for me to see what is not obvious to the ordinary reader, and what might need expanding a little. --Demiurge1000 (talk) 22:21, 16 December 2010 (UTC)
 * I have re-worded some parts of the post-race section to introduce a bit more context so that the quotes are clearer. The last remaining one that I can't really do much with is "I was really going to push him across." I think you're right that Bowyer is referring to Tony Stewart, but it's not clear from the context in this article, and very hard to make it clear unless the article is restructured to follow the sense of the USA Today article that's the reference. (And that would end up being too close paraphrasing, I feel.) So, you may want to choose a different Bowyer quote or just phrase this part differently. I've tweaked a few other phrases as well, and apart from that one quote, it all looks good to me. --Demiurge1000 (talk) 22:58, 18 December 2010 (UTC)

Qualifying figures
The article states "The two drivers that failed to qualify for the race were Jeff Green and Johnny Sauter."

However the qualifying list shows that Sauter was faster than both Tony Raines and Andy Lally, the 41st and 42nd qualifiers.

Incidentally, that should be ...two drivers who failed ... not ...two drivers that failed.... Moriori (talk) 01:36, 11 October 2014 (UTC)


 * --Bentvfan54321 (talk) 01:48, 11 October 2014 (UTC)

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