Talk:Bombus sylvestris

Wiki Education Foundation-supported course assignment
This article is or was the subject of a Wiki Education Foundation-supported course assignment. Further details are available on the course page. Student editor(s): AddyShak. Peer reviewers: Marcus.kwon, Kew8888.

Above undated message substituted from Template:Dashboard.wikiedu.org assignment by PrimeBOT (talk) 18:14, 17 January 2022 (UTC)

Section/Subsection Reorganization + Reference/Citation Fixes
Hello, I am an undergraduate student at Washington University in St. Louis editing this page for a class assignment. I restructured your page to organize it in a way with which things flow together better. Specifically, I created all the current subsections under larger sections (especially under 'Behavior'). I think this is easier to follow than having each specific behavior have its own main section. I also eliminated your 'Overview' section and combined that with your introductory hook, as I saw that having them separate was redundant. I also took the liberty of fixing your reference/citation problems, so everything is correctly cited to the linked reference in the end section. Hope this helps! Marcus.kwon (talk) 18:31, 30 September 2015 (UTC)

Thank you! I appreciate your help and will ensure I combine sections after producing my work to promote cohesiveness. Thank you again also for fixing my citations!AddyShak (talk) 20:20, 20 October 2015 (UTC)

Wikipedia Peer Review
Hi, I am an undergraduate student at Washington University in St. Louis peer reviewing this page for the same class assignment as the student above. First of all, I added a course banner to the talk page. This article was thorough and well-written in the "Behavior" section. I removed "Britain Distribution," as I did not think it was necessary, and put all the information concerning the species distribution under "Distribution." In addition, I would expand the section "Habitat" with information concerning the specific types of niches B. sylvestris might occupy in the environments they are in. I also edited for grammatical errors, particularly under "Colony Cycle". Finally, it would be good to mention in the talk section the information that has been added to this article if large chunks of information are added. Eliseoh (talk) 20:57, 1 October 2015 (UTC)

Thank you! I understand the reason for putting all of the information under the "Distribution" section so thanks for taking the liberty to do that. AddyShak (talk) 20:24, 20 October 2015 (UTC)

Edits for Behavioral Ecology WIki Project
1)The last sentence of the overview was worded a little strangely for the portion “while still keeping the survival of their young intact.” I would suggest changing this sentence to something along the lines of “while still supporting their survival” in order for clarification. 2) In the Description and Identification section, I deleted the “1” after (abdominal segment) because it seemed to be accidentally placed there. Further, only details of the male is discussed in this section. Perhaps adding more about the female bee and providing a picture would be useful. 3) For the Distribution section, a map should be included so that there is visual understanding of where the bee is located. Mention of its prevalence would also help in expanding the section further. 4) The Habitat section can be expanded by stating more information of how the bee finds the site to use, how the bee builds its nest, or if it does neither and just inhabits a current nest that should be stated in a sentence as well. As of now it just states different areas that the bee can be found, but no mention of its nesting process. 5) I think that a taxonomy and phylogeny section should be added. Although the Scientific classification box states the information, having a separate section that links to the family and genus of the species is usually given for the different species of bee websites. In this section, it can be also stated which species are closely related to the bee. 6) The Diet section for the bee is very short and should be expanded upon. For example, what exactly does the bee forage from the different specimens? Is it pollen or some other resource? It is mentioned in the pollen collection section a bit, so perhaps combining the section would be helpful. 7) The section Interventionism of Parasitic Relationship is a bit confusing in its title and information. I would change the title to just “Human Intervention” and expand on the information a bit more. This can be done by addressing questions such as: How exactly have the bees evolved alongside their target species? How is human intervention not needed and condoned, yet it is good to ensure rich environments and habitats for the bees? Etc. Otherwise, the article is easy to read and well written! Good job.

Kew8888 (talk) 14:34, 28 November 2015 (UTC)

Thank you, I´ll be sure to look back at these when I continue editing my page! AddyShak (talk) 20:54, 1 December 2015 (UTC)

Edits and comments
In general, I think the article needs more information in order to become a good article. I would add more information in the general overview in order to give a better summary of the bee species and in some of the sections that are only one or few sentences long. I think some parts of the article were a bit repetitive including parts about host-parasite relationship. I think if it were organized better, the article would be easier to read. For example, the “Colony cycle” section talks about host-parasite relationship, which I don’t think fit under the section about colony cycle. Also, I don’t think you need a separate section for “Ecological summary.” I have added some links including Bombus pratorum, corbicula, and Bombus jonellus in order to help the readers understand the article better. Also, I have fixed some grammar that I found were awkward or incorrect. I moved the “Cuckoo Bee vs. Queen/Worker Bumblebees” subsection from the “Behavior” section to “Description and Identification” section because it was more about its physical appearance than its behavior.KimCourtney (talk) 20:52, 4 December 2015 (UTC)

Thank you! I appreciate it! AddyShak (talk) 23:26, 4 December 2015 (UTC)

Suggestions
Hey! Great article, I only made a few edits adding some hyperlinks and putting an image of the bee foraging in the foraging sections. I think the article would benefit most from having more information about some of these sections. It was clear that there wasn't that much information on the bee because some of the sections only had one sentence or so. Otherwise, I thought the article was very clear and concise!Matthewkim93 (talk) 00:20, 5 December 2015 (UTC)

Peer review
Hi!

Your article is very well-written and concise! However I do have a few suggestions for you, which mostly involve the organization of the article. Firstly, I noticed you didn't have a "Taxonomy and phylogeny" section, so I made one and added whatever little information I could gather to it. I also noticed that a majority of the "Ecological Summary" section was italicized (probably accidentally), so I fixed that for you. Additionally, I think the section "Cuckoo Bee vs. Queen/Worker Bumblebees" should really be it's own heading (i.e. not under "Description and Identification"), because it compares behavior more than it does physical characteristics. This is just a suggestion, so I didn't change anything about it. The sections "Distribution" and "Habitat" were short so I just combined the two. It would also be great to include a distribution map if you could. Besides that, I think expanding on general topics like "Diet" and "Behavior" would improve the article.

Overall you did a great job with this!

Roohi.byakod (talk) 02:57, 5 December 2015 (UTC)

Peer review
First off, section headings should only have the first word capitalized (Taxonomy and phylogeny not Taxonomy and Phylogeny). The Taxonomy and phylogeny section is lacking. Where does the name come from? Does it mean anything? These questions could be answered. Also, if you call the bee by its name/nickname, it isn't necessary to add any modifiers afterward (i.e. B. sylvestris cuckcoo bumblebees or forest cuckcoo bee (Bombus sylvestris)). I fixed these redundancies as I found them. The Worker rearing section should probably be taken out. It doesn't state any new information, and is simply repetitious. On a minor note, you don't need the modifier "the" before B. sylvestris (i.e. the Bombus sylvestris does not construct its own nest...). I omitted the "thes" in the article. It would be interesting to know why the males and females feed on different nectar (in the Ecological summary section). If you can find the information, you should add the conservation status of the bees. Is it endangered? I liked the pictures, and I thought that the Colony cycle section tied in well with the Behavior section.Floyd Burney (talk) 05:53, 5 December 2015 (UTC)