Talk:Kaiserin-Friedrich-Gymnasium

Discussion of a changes, following request by editor for feedback
Here are a few small changes. The article is actually readable, already, so these are small things.

1) The abbreviation KFG is not needed, because it is not used later in the article, and it's unlikely an English reader would have heard of "KFG".

2) Moved the "s" inside the link to "Gymnasiums", so that it's easier to read.

3) No need to be so precise about numbers. Two alternatives for this sentence: "The school has approximate 115 teachers and 1,535 students."

a) "The school has 115 teachers and 1,500 students." b) "As of the 2004/2005 school year, there were 115 teachers and 1,535 students."

The issue here is that these figures are not really open to dispute (is that right?) and readers will expect that it's possible students have been added or left. You don't want to "slow down" your readers by giving them too much detail.

In the sentence "The Gymnasium has a library with 10,000 books", the word "about" is removed for the same reasons.

4) "Latin". This word is always capitalized in English.

5) "Educational Stage 5" is the "proper name" that this thing is known by (it doesn't refer to anything else, just itself). Proper names are always capitalized in English.

6) The links you added to "Gymnasium" and "Abitur" are appropriate, because these words, used in this way, are not familiar to many Americans. However, linking "multi-storey car park" and "library" is unnecessary, because almost all English speakers will already understand what these mean. If you are interested in information about linking style, see WP:CONTEXT.

7) This sentence is missing something: "It is one of the oldest schools in the German-speaking part."  Readers will not know what "part" you are talking about. Is it a German-speaking part of a town? A district? A country?

I hope this is helps! Please feel free to ask me other questions.

Alpha Ralpha Boulevard (talk) 20:46, 24 July 2008 (UTC)

External links modified
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 * Added archive https://web.archive.org/web/20110719051534/http://www.kaiserin-friedrich.de/files/Inspektionsbericht_KFG_5195_CB.pdf to http://www.kaiserin-friedrich.de/files/Inspektionsbericht_KFG_5195_CB.pdf

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