Talk:Sickle cell retinopathy

Wiki Education Foundation-supported course assignment
This article was the subject of a Wiki Education Foundation-supported course assignment, between 14 June 2021 and 11 July 2021. Further details are available on the course page. Student editor(s): TeHilla98. Peer reviewers: Mohammad Aldalou.

Above undated message substituted from Template:Dashboard.wikiedu.org assignment by PrimeBOT (talk) 03:33, 18 January 2022 (UTC)

Work-plan: Medical student editor
Greeting everyone. I am a medical student that is participating in the Osmosis Wikipedia editing course and I have selected this article to contribute to. I have identified a few areas that need improvement and will be making my contributions over the next four weeks. Please feel free to offer any useful feedback.

Introduction I intend to expand on the existing definition adding more scientific details in a way that makes it easy to understand.

Classification I will be checking the validity of the listed sources and citing the lines that are without citations.

Signs and Symptoms My edit will separate signs and symptoms into two subcategories.

Causes This section does not clearly highlight the risk factors and the acquired nature of sickle cell disease. I intend to rectify that by briefly explaining the genetics and the subtypes of sickle cell disease and how it affects the retina.

Diagnosis I will expand on each listed method of diagnosis including information on how it is conducted. Additionally I will be double checking the differential diagnosis list and will make the relevant additions. There is also a minor “typo” in the first line that I will be correcting

Prevention Methods to slow/halt progression through the stages of retinopathy should be mentioned in this section.

Treatment The explanations of the three types of interventions are vague. I will be expanding each section providing additional information on the approach to treatment.

General Additions/Improvements Addition of citations where needed.

The article can benefit from the addition of pictures displaying what each stage of the Goldberg classification looks like. Once I can locate pictures with the appropriate licenses, I will include them.

Wikipedia links can be added for terms that will not be readily understood by the general public. These terms include but are not limited to -	Retinopathy -	Ophthalmic Examination (link to eye examination) -	Intravitreal examination -	Neovascularization

The sources I intend to use are as follows

I am open to any feedback on my proposed changes and I look forward to making my contribution. TeHilla98 (talk) 23:11, 18 June 2021 (UTC)

Peer Review - Osmosis Wiki Editing Course:
Hello, I've read your article, please accept my feedback: 1-The Article outlines are perfect and follow the Wiki-Project disease outlines, but miss (Epidemiology and Prognosis)subsections. 2-The lead is excellent when it comes to summarizing the topic, but not all information included is present in the body. 3-Neutral tone, but unbalanced covering of the major points of the article. As there is less focus on signs/symptoms/diagnosis, thus I would expand them. 4-Article needs more citations, preferably post each statement. Mohammad Aldalou (talk) 14:38, 10 July 2021 (UTC)

Hello Mohammed thank you for your feedback. I will make the necessary changes. Please note that I only edited the lead and NPSCR sections thus far. The other sections are the contributions of other wiki editors. 63.143.118.146 (talk) 15:14, 10 July 2021 (UTC)

Good luck and keep the great work up