Talk:Suicide of Ajax Vase

Untitled
Comments: I recommend you include a brief identification of the vase, including style, date, place of origin, and material. Also, I might avoid general phrases like "well-known" and "unique." Both of those descriptions are probably true, but a more factual, specific description would sound more encyclopedic. I enjoyed the description of the mythology that surrounds the vase's scene and thought that it provided useful context for the description. It might help if you commented on what Greek texts contain the story of Ajax though, because there are often different versions of the same myth. I also recommend that you include more description of the vase itself. Think about Professor Paga's analysis of the different gazes in class. That level of depth would expand the reach of your article and help connect it more with our theme. I corrected a few punctuation and spelling mistakes, but I do not know how to fix your picture so sorry I cannot help more on that. Good work. --Njpetersen (talk) 18:42, 5 November 2017 (UTC)Noah Petersen

Hi there! Make sure to give your article a clear and concise title (think about how someone would search for your article on Wikipedia in the future). Jpaga (talk) 14:04, 6 November 2017 (UTC)

Wiki Education Foundation-supported course assignment
This article is or was the subject of a Wiki Education Foundation-supported course assignment. Further details are available on the course page. Student editor(s): Esharrett. Peer reviewers: Njpetersen.

Above undated message substituted from Template:Dashboard.wikiedu.org assignment by PrimeBOT (talk) 03:54, 18 January 2022 (UTC)

Sunni's Comment
Hi Emma, so far it looks like you have a good start to your article. I would like to see defined sections and maybe some more pictures if you are able to find any that are within Copyright regulations. You've done well describing Exekias' style, but I think you could go more in depth with what is depicted. I do enjoy that you've included the myth, but as Noah also commented maybe include some other literary sources talking about this scene. You could also talk about the technique of black figure and how that adds in to the overall composition of the vase. Overall, keep working, you're doing a good job! Sunniobrien (talk) 19:27, 14 November 2017 (UTC)Sunni O'Brien

Comments from Prof. Paga
Hi Emma - this is a great start to your article! You've got some good comments from your peer-reviewer and your TF, Sunni. Here are a few of my own suggestions: Jpaga (talk) 15:44, 27 November 2017 (UTC)
 * Make sure to divide your article into different sections and include a "lead paragraph" that briefly describes the object
 * You say that Exekias depicts Ajax more than any other artist -- this claim needs a citation / source!
 * What is a bronze "matrix" ? If possible, it might be helpful to include links or images of these other objects, for comparison.