User:ZachsMind

Biographical Data
My full name is Robert Shawn "Zach" Garland. Zach is a nickname that I've carried with me since 1985 when I was apocryphally involved with the Church of the SubGenius. Back then it was geekly fashionable to have pseudonyms, and mine was Doktor Zachary Carleton. I later discovered to my dismay that I was a trendy "Bobbie" and was deservedly shunned, but the "Zach" stuck and I still wear it with pride. Today, only solicitors, bill collectors, and some blood relatives call me "Robert." The "Mind" is added to "Zach" in almost all my online activity, because there's almost as many Zachs out there as there are Bobs or Roberts, but I've yet to encounter another "ZachsMind."

Update: There's another ZachsMind out there! He's like in Blogspot or something. Yes I'm unhappy.

Update to update: Wow. This page is still here? I haven't been here in ages. I no longer update Wiki pages cuz other ppl just remove anything I contribute. So i have moved on. I kibitz occasionally in Talk pages and then forget to go back and check progress. I guess I don't care.

Update to update to update: Wow. It's 2015 when I type this paragraph. The previous paragraph was years before that and the rest of this mess was years before that. I'm very old now. Next time I update this I may not have any teeth left.

Update to update to update to update: It's now August of 2018 and last October I lost a tooth so now my smile is akin to that of Alfred E. Neuman. Sorry for this 2018 interruption to the 2015 me.

Update to update to update continued: Hopefully next time I update this we'll finally have flying cars. (we don't. signed, 2018 me) We now return you to your previously scheduled rambling by a much younger me. end of update to update to update. (also end to update to update and update)

It helps to be unique in one's mediocrity. I was born a Texan, and still reside in Dallas, Texas, though I spent my most formidable years of childhood in southeast Michigan which means I only have a thick southern twang after having consumed nominal amounts of alcohol. Otherwise I sound like a midwesterner failing to fake an accent. I can most easily be reached at my address [mailto:zachsmind@yahoo.com ZachsMind@yahoo.com], and my online journal or 'blog' is located at www.zachsmind.com.

Update: I am no longer master of my own domain. Check me in Twitter or Wordpress. Or Google me. (This is still relatively accurate as of 2018, as is most of this page.)

My first recorded contribution to Wikipedia was on April 26, 2003, where I introduced reference to the term Vigilante as it applies to comic books and dime novels. Others have since expanded upon the idea. I may have made contributions prior to that, but was not registered and therefore haven't proof. Other pages to which I have made minor contributions include Sarah Vowell, Sam Seder, and Al Franken. I am perhaps uneccessarily cautious in contributing, because I believe others are generally better informed.

Update: I don't think I did any of the 'mission goals' listed below. I'm very Slackful.

2018 Update: I still don't believe anyone has ever read this page. (glances at archive) well in years anyway.

Mission Goals

 * List of halloween songs
 * Figure out how to add fancy stuff to this page so I don't look like such a n00b.
 * Learn the coding and markup of WikiPedia so I feel more comfortable with contributing.
 * Expand upon Wikipedia pages of interest to me (where appropriate), like links adjacent to:
 * Air America Radio
 * Church of the SubGenius
 * Music of Texas
 * Crisis on Infinite Earths and other comic book related articles.
 * Movies
 * Everything2
 * Kingdom of Loathing
 * Mystery Science Theater 3000

Contributions
The following links are pages to which I've contributed. In most cases, not by much.
 * Wikipedia
 * Steady, As She Goes by The Raconteurs (covers section, Adele reference)
 * Air America Radio
 * Al Franken
 * Firefly (television series)
 * Helen Thomas
 * Janeane Garofalo
 * Sam Seder
 * Sarah Vowell
 * The Majority Report
 * Vigilante


 * Wikiquote
 * Janeane Garofalo
 * George Carlin
 * Jerry Springer
 * Firefly
 * Buffy the Vampire Slayer
 * Carl Sagan
 * Mystery Science Theater 3000
 * Helen Thomas
 * George W. Bush
 * Al Franken
 * Joss Whedeon
 * David Lynch
 * Advertising slogans
 * Independence Day
 * The Princess Bride
 * List of films
 * Anonymous
 * Back To The Future
 * Finding Nemo
 * Frank Zappa
 * Parenting