User talk:Jahvon Blair

Welcome!
Hello, Jahvon Blair, and welcome to Wikipedia! My name is Shalor and I work with Wiki Education; I help support students who are editing as part of a class assignment.

I hope you enjoy editing here. If you haven't already done so, please check out the student training library, which introduces you to editing and Wikipedia's core principles. You may also want to check out the Teahouse, a community of Wikipedia editors dedicated to helping new users. Below are some resources to help you get started editing. If you have any questions, please don't hesitate to contact me on my talk page. Shalor (Wiki Ed) (talk) 20:04, 12 February 2020 (UTC)

Hunger Games
Hi! I saw that you assigned yourself the Hunger Games article. I'm not sure if you are still interested in this specific page or not, but I wanted to caution you about this page. It's a Featured Article, which means that it's one of the highest quality articles on Wikipedia. As such it will be extremely difficult to find something to add to the article that hasn't already been added or discussed and determined that it shouldn't be in the article. If you do decide to proceed with this article, you must discuss any changes on the article's talk page and reach consensus before moving anything live. The reason for this is that Featured Articles are heavily cultivated and as such, there may be more pushback than there would be with another, less developed article. Shalor (Wiki Ed) (talk) 14:55, 24 April 2020 (UTC)

May 2020
Hello, and welcome to Wikipedia. This is a message letting you know that one or more of your recent edits to The Hunger Games has been undone by an automated computer program called ClueBot NG.

Thank you. ClueBot NG (talk) 15:38, 18 May 2020 (UTC)
 * ClueBot NG makes very few mistakes, but it does happen. If you believe the change you made was constructive, please read about it, [ report it here], remove this message from your talk page, and then make the edit again.
 * For help, take a look at the introduction.
 * The following is the log entry regarding this message: The Hunger Games was changed by Jahvon Blair (u) (t) ANN scored at 0.903356 on 2020-05-18T15:38:03+00:00

Please do not add original research or novel syntheses of published material to articles as you apparently did to The Hunger Games. Please cite a reliable source for all of your contributions. Thank you. Hillelfrei  talk   16:04, 18 May 2020 (UTC)

Response
Hi, on my talk page you posted this:
 * Dear, Shalor I'm trying to edit the hunger games page and it's not letting me make any edits can you please help me on how to fix this problem? Jahvon Blair (talk) 15:55, 18 May 2020 (UTC)

Reviewing the material, it looks like there were several issues.

The main issues look to center around sourcing and tone. You didn't add in-line citations when you added content, which poses an issue of verification. The writing was also fairly casual in tone, which also posed an issue. The material also doesn't really fit in the given article and section. The source discusses the differences between the first novel and the movie based on it, however the article you're working on discusses the series as a whole. Content added here should discuss the series as a whole for the most part.

The sourcing also poses an issue as well. The Retriever is listed in ProQuest, but it's also a student run newspaper. Typically college newspapers aren't seen as overwhelmingly noteworthy unless the paper has distinguished itself by receiving major awards and the like. This is something that you'd likely not have been aware of, so no worries about not knowing this. It's just something to be careful of in the future. The reason for this is that student run papers are more likely to contain errors or other issues that would make them less reliable than a newspaper that was professionally released, even if the paper has faculty at the highest level. It's why the awards are important, since they help show that the paper's staff is seen as reliable when it comes to editorial oversight and verification of data.

Right now, since the material has been challenged the best thing to do would be to continue to discuss the changes on the article's talk page and try to reach a consensus. Shalor (Wiki Ed) (talk) 17:48, 18 May 2020 (UTC)

Potential re-write
Hi! So all of the prior taken into account, let's try to re-write the material. Here's one section from your sandbox:


 * Lionsgate Entertainment acquired worldwide distribution rights to a film adaptation of The Hunger Games, produced by Nina Jacobson's Color Force production company. That’s why in this article on Audiobooks.com it explains the debuts people have on the Hunger Games regarding it being in the same category as bestselling novels. The books were made available as audiobooks right before the first movie came out.Collins adapted the novel for film herself, along with director Gary Ross. The cast included Jennifer Lawrence as Katniss, Josh Hutcherson as Peeta, and Liam Hemsworth as Gale. The first film began production in Spring 2011, and was released in March 2012.
 * When the film came out, not everyone had nice things to say. An article by Anita Singh explains that people made negative comments about the Hunger Games film..Some people enjoy watching the film “The Hunger Games” and add it to their list because it’s one of the most popular movies in the world, said Jason Guerrasio in 2016.In an article on USA Today, Bryan Alexander explained Jennifer Lawerence's take on the Hunger Games and the risk she took in her life. Jennifer explained that the Hunger Games took a hit on her life for the better.

Be careful about how things are phrased, as we don't want to sound like we're taking a side on things or like we're being too casual. I also need to note that the audiobooks already existed prior to the film's release, as they were released simultaneously or within a few months of the books. In the press release you have as a source, this was just an announcement that a streaming service had purchased the rights to offer the books to their clients. It's not really pertinent to the film adaptations per se.

Now in good news, we don't have to do a huge amount of legwork for this as far as source finding goes, since we can pull basic information (and sourcing!) from the main article on the film. As such, we can re-write the above as follows:


 * In 2009 Nina Jacobson's production company Color Force acquired worldwide distribution rights to The Hunger Games and entered into a co-production agreement with Lionsgate Entertainment. Collins adapted the novel for film herself, along with director Gary Ross. The cast included Jennifer Lawrence as Katniss, Josh Hutcherson as Peeta, and Liam Hemsworth as Gale. The first film began production in Spring 2011, and was released in March 2012.
 * The Hunger Games received mostly positive reviews from critics and earned a rating of 84% on Rotten Tomatoes, with the consensus "Thrilling and superbly acted, The Hunger Games captures the dramatic violence, raw emotion, and ambitious scope of its source novel." During its opening weekend the film was the focus of controversy surrounding issues of racism, sexism and unrealistic body image.

For this I added specific information about what people were criticizing. I also left out the part about how Lawrence felt about the films - that's something that would be a better fit for the specific film or character articles. This is meant to be only a general overview, so it's a wee bit too much specific information for what's meant to be a general section. Now using the changes I've made as a guide, you can summarize some of the information from the pages for the following two films and add them to the section. The content should basically give a brief overview of the following:


 * When was the film announced?
 * Any changes in the director and cast?
 * When did filming start and end? And where did it take place?
 * When did it release? What was the reception?
 * Any controversies surrounding the film's release?

Each bullet point can be about 1-2 sentences' worth of content, so this will leave you with something akin to what I had above. Shalor (Wiki Ed) (talk) 18:25, 18 May 2020 (UTC)