User talk:Jeterfan252

Thoughts on your sandbox work
Hi, just replying to the questions you left on Buggie's talk page in case he can't get back to you right away! Looking through your sandbox work, I have a few suggestions and comments! Hope that helps! Sleuthwood (talk) 18:45, 15 March 2012 (UTC)
 * You will want to read your section in relation to the other sections-- just from a glance-through (and I don't know sports very well so maybe I'm just confused!), it seemed like you were suggesting that Division III schools offer scholarships, while the article that is already there suggests that Division III schools don't offer scholarships. Just remember that the article is the full entity, and that all subsections should work to create a cohesive whole.
 * You will probably want to retitle your sub-subsections as "Financial Comparison," etc., and your whole section to "Comparison of Division I and Division III Athletics."
 * While the "financially" section seems good and sufficiently supported by citations, the second section needs quite a bit of work. It's definitely not operating under "neutral point of view," and if you want to make such claims as you make, you need to both 1.) cite the source of that opinion/survey and 2.) offer opposing views, presuming they exist, and cite them, too.
 * Under the "Effects" section, you say the results are "surprising." You should change this language as it suggests that you are writing from a certain point of view.  After that, the cited bits are useful; just frame them without demonstrating your own view through your choice of words.