Wikipedia:Peer review/Boar/archive1

Boar
I have never before requested a peer review, so please bear (boar) with me, haha. I stumbled across this article and have been doing some minor cleanup. It seemse the sort of article that could quickly be polished to good or featured status. I am hoping for constructive criticism and guidance to improve this article. thanks. &mdash; Gaff ταλκ 19:29, 7 June 2007 (UTC)
 * This article needs to be more completely referenced and the internal jumps cleaned up. Also it could use sections on "Anatomy" and "Habitat".-- Birgitte  SB  15:09, 8 June 2007 (UTC)
 * I'll keep digging for references. Could you expand on what you mean by "internal jumps"?  I'll also work on the habitiat and anatomy.  Good ideas! &mdash; Gaff  ταλκ 18:01, 8 June 2007 (UTC)
 * Internal jumps are link to external websites within the main prose as opposed to in the references or external links sections.-- Birgitte SB  18:49, 8 June 2007 (UTC)

At the moment I'm afraid it's quite far from even GA status. It contains a good deal of information, however, and with some clean-up it could be a decent article. Here are my main objections:
 * It needs more references. The info on weight and on the size of the sounders need to be referenced, but these are only examples, it should be referenced throughout. Also, the references that are there need to be more uniform. Rather than links in the text to external sites, there should be footnotes. Especially web links such as the ones in the section about WWT are not good. The same goes for "See also medieval hunting". "See also" should be kept to its own section at the bottom.


 * Much of the information is in "bullet point" form; it should be written in more continuous prose. Detached 1-sentence paragraphs such as "Also, in Hindu mythology, the third avatar of the Lord Vishnu was Varaha, a boar", and "The wild boar was a symbol of Richard III of England" should be avoided. The sentence on the Grimsby coat of arms following directly upon the story of Shahrbaraz (without even punctuation!) is quite simply bizarre.


 * Pictures: at the moment there are probably too many, some of them could safely be moved to Commons.

Good luck! Lampman  Talk to me! 

By the way, there's an interesting anecdote about how John of Gaunt supposedly killed the last boar in England. You can find it here. Lampman  Talk to me! 
 * I agree that it has a long way to go to become even a good article. That's part of the fun, since ultimately this article should reach Featured (it did in German).  I know its going to take some doing and I am in no hurry.  Your comments are much appreciated.  &mdash; Gaff  ταλκ 08:32, 9 June 2007 (UTC)
 * I agree that it has a long way to go to become even a good article. That's part of the fun, since ultimately this article should reach Featured (it did in German).  I know its going to take some doing and I am in no hurry.  Your comments are much appreciated.  &mdash; Gaff  ταλκ 08:32, 9 June 2007 (UTC)