Wikipedia:Peer review/Cub Swanson/archive1

Cub Swanson
I've listed this article for peer review because: May fellow Wikipedians kindly give me feedback on whether the article provides a complete picture or does it leave you wanting for more info? Is it worth a GA status?
 * 1) The article has been expanded significantly
 * 2) New aspects of Swanson has been brought in, eg sponsorship, filmatography and sponsorship
 * 3) Cub Swanson is a rising star in the UFC featherweight division. Let us perfect his biography for all the MMA fans out there.

Thank you very much 张雨涵 (talk) 15:25, 5 August 2017 (UTC)

Comments From Eddie891

 * Per WP:LEDE, an article of that length should have a lead paragraph of about 3-4 paragraphs.
 * The article seems slightly excessively broken up. Sentences like " The adoptive family was religious." are much shorter than could be. You could probably consider merging sentences like "The adoptive family was religious. So Swanson spent most of his early life in church." into one sentence.
 * Per MOS:PARAGRAPHS, "The number of single-sentence paragraphs should be minimized, since they can inhibit the flow of the text; by the same token, paragraphs that exceed a certain length become hard to read. Short paragraphs and single sentences generally do not warrant their own subheading; in such circumstances, it may be preferable to use bullet points." It seems like you have a large number of single sentence- short paragraphs.

A good article, just needs some style workEddie891 Talk Work 00:30, 16 October 2017 (UTC)