Wikipedia:Peer review/Star Trek: The Original Series/archive1

Star Trek: The Original Series
This peer review discussion has been closed. I have quick-checked the whole article as a sole reader. I have not substantially contributed this article either at all or very much if my name is in the history log. Nevertheless, this article should have a chance to be reviewed for a reputation that this article well deserves. Please give some credit to a bunch of substantial and significant contributors of this article; they deserve all the work they have done. --George Ho (talk) 08:06, 5 January 2012 (UTC)


 * Lead needs to be expanded to three to four paragraphs.
 * When doing conversions, please use standard abbreviations: for example, miles -> mi, kilometers squared -> km2, and pounds -> lb.
 * Headings generally should not repeat the title of the article.
 * Watch out for redundancies as well (i.e. "in order to", "all of").

Hope these comments help. Darth Sjones23 (talk - contributions) 01:41, 16 January 2012 (UTC)

UPDATE: There have been changes after your review, Sjones: http://en.wikipedia.org/w/index.php?title=Star_Trek%3A_The_Original_Series&action=historysubmit&diff=471619105&oldid=471446586. --George Ho (talk) 05:11, 16 January 2012 (UTC)

Another UPDATE: http://en.wikipedia.org/w/index.php?title=Star_Trek%3A_The_Original_Series&action=historysubmit&diff=471723258&oldid=471619105 --George Ho (talk) 22:47, 16 January 2012 (UTC)

Want another review; Another UPDATE: http://en.wikipedia.org/w/index.php?title=Star_Trek%3A_The_Original_Series&action=historysubmit&diff=472934280&oldid=472895461 --George Ho (talk) 06:06, 24 January 2012 (UTC)

Here's some more ideas on improving the article: I think these ideas would help further in improving the article. Darth Sjones23 (talk - contributions) 14:51, 24 January 2012 (UTC)
 * Shrink down the table of contents by merging subsections or a proper system of daughter pages per WP:WIAFA.
 * Avoid contractions (i.e. wasn't, doesn't) outside of quotations.
 * The article may need to go summary style, where appropriate series of subpages are used.
 * As mentioned in my above review, we need to use standard abbreviations when we are doing conversions per Manual of Style (numbers).

UPDATE: http://en.wikipedia.org/w/index.php?title=Star_Trek%3A_The_Original_Series&action=historysubmit&diff=473108898&oldid=473052932. Found the abbreviations you may have mentioned; are there any other I missed? --George Ho (talk) 20:41, 25 January 2012 (UTC)

Need more review; another UPDATE: http://en.wikipedia.org/w/index.php?title=Star_Trek%3A_The_Original_Series&action=historysubmit&diff=473561805&oldid=473108898. Is the addition of another parody necessary? --George Ho (talk) 02:02, 30 January 2012 (UTC)