Talk:PlayOnline/GA1

GA Review

Article (edit | visual edit | history) · Article talk (edit | history) · Watch

Reviewer: Jaguar (talk · contribs) 13:13, 12 April 2016 (UTC)

Will do soon JAGUAR  13:13, 12 April 2016 (UTC)

Initial comments

• The lead needs to be expanded slightly to meet WP:LEADLENGTH. I would just recommending adding a bit on its reception
• "The termination date of service for Final Fantasy XI and Playonline" - PlayOnline
• "Square announced three Final Fantasy games," - needs italicisation
• "The service was first announced as costing 500 yen" - ¥500
• "and a 1000 yen monthly user fee" - ¥1000
• "PlayOnline opened on June 6, 2000 to both Japanese and English speaking players" - speaking players? How about just something like Japan and English-speaking countries or even Japan and Anglophone countries
• "The sites merchandise included pieces from" - site's
• "The browser was not a general purpose Internet tool, but only accessed Square content" - delink Square as it already has been linked
• "exclusively despite Microsofts initial wishes" - Microsoft's
• " for this reason. it was hoped that content would" - capital 'It'
• "retailing at 7,140 Yen and had a monthly subscription price of 1,344 Yen" - use the Yen symbols ¥7140 and ¥1344
• "and a sought 5 million dollar settlement" - $5 million
• No dead links
• No dab links

Pretty cool to think that an online service for the PS2 shut down last month! On hold until all are addressed. JAGUAR  13:22, 12 April 2016 (UTC)

Much better! Thanks for the speedy fixes. Promoted. JAGUAR  14:10, 12 April 2016 (UTC)