Talk:Asif Ali Zardari/GA1

GA Review
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Reviewer: Electronscope44 (talk) 14:08, 3 July 2011 (UTC)

I am going to use the GA review cheatsheet to determine if this article is a good article. Electronscope44 (talk) 14:08, 3 July 2011 (UTC)

I'll mark comments when I think it has satisfied a criterion, and mark ❌ that does not satisy. Electronscope44 (talk) 14:17, 3 July 2011 (UTC)


 * GA review (see here for what the criteria are, and here for what they are not)


 * It is reasonably well written.
 * This article is very well-written. However, it has an ugly error in the beginning. "is the 11th and current President of Pakistan since 2008". Remove 'since 2008'.
 * Done. Mni9791 (talk) 12:49, 4 July 2011 (UTC)
 * Electronscope44 (talk) 14:07, 4 July 2011 (UTC)


 * It is factually accurate and verifiable.
 * This article lists every detail down. However, the sources are written in MLA format instead of the standard wikipedia format that I have seen on most Wikipedia pages.


 * It is broad in its coverage.
 * It follows the neutral point of view policy.
 * It is stable.
 * This article has also just underwent major revisions in the lead apparently also. However, there are no apparent edit wars.
 * The article was protected till August 1, 2011 from IP vandalism which apparently occurs quite often.


 * It is illustrated by images, where possible and appropriate.
 * There is not enough pictures at all in the article. It is very poorly illustrated.Electronscope44 (talk) 14:35, 3 July 2011 (UTC)
 * I take this back. I looked into the Wikimedia Commons and there are very few Zardari pictures available. Not only that, but also I have noticed on the talk page that efforts have been already done to attain more pictures. I encourage you to continue looking for more pictures. Electronscope44 (talk) 16:27, 3 July 2011 (UTC)


 * Overall: Let me go through the remainder list on the cheatsheat first. Electronscope44 (talk)
 * The article nomination is on hold for three days to make sure the suggested improvements are done. Electronscope44 (talk) 16:27, 3 July 2011 (UTC)

Checklist
However in April, Zardari won a key victory against the judiciary over his corruption trials when Geneva Attorney General Daniel Zappelli expressed that Zardari can't be prosecuted under international laws because of Zardari's presidential immunity.
 * It has Template:Persondata.
 * The article does not have short choppy sentences or short choppy paragraphs.
 * The article has contractions such as don't, won't, haven't, wouldn't, couldn't, shouldn't.
 * Done. Mni9791 (talk) 12:51, 4 July 2011 (UTC)
 * Electronscope44 (talk) 14:07, 4 July 2011 (UTC)

"However, a month later he was again unexpectedly arrested for failing to show up for a hearing on a murder case in Islamabad. However, the ordinance was up against mounting public pressure and an uncompromising judiciary. However, Bilawal became Chairman of the PPP because Zardari favored Bilawal to represent Bhutto's legacy in part to avoid division within the party due to his own unpopularity However, the parliamentary elections were postponed six weeks to February 18 because of the turmoil after the assassination. However, by the end of April the agreement collapsed as the Pakistani military pursued an unpopular offensive in neighboring Dir province However in April, Zardari won a key victory against the judiciary over his corruption trials when Geneva Attorney General Daniel Zappelli expressed that Zardari can't be prosecuted under international laws because of Zardari's presidential immunity." Although I understand that this page has a lot of Howevers, I believe these lines enhance the well-written prose of this page. But I think the article should at least place some efforts into removing the Howevers.
 * It has consistent date styles. See Manual of Style (dates and numbers). The article follows the British style. (which also correctly associates with the British heritage of Pakistan.)
 * Watch qualifiers at the start of sentences such as However, In regards to...
 * Any galleries have introductions
 * Double check wikilinks that they lead to the appropriate spot
 * Every direct quote is directly cited
 * Make sure multiple footnotes are listed in order
 * Make sure the citation style is consistent. ❌ I have explained under the referencing section earlier.
 * watch for abbreviations, that they are either explained or eliminated. Especially i.e., etc., no., Inc., Corp.
 * make sure all title headings are correctly capitalized
 * The lead should adequately summarize the content of the article. (GA criteria)
 * There should not be anything in the lead not mentioned in the rest of the article. (GA criteria)
 * Wikilinks should only be made if they are relevant to the context. Common words do not need wikilinking.
 * A word only needs to be wikilinked once within each section.
 * External links only belong in the External links section.
 * It is recommended not to specify the size of images. The sizes should be what readers have specified in their user preferences.
 * Text should not be sandwiched between two adjacent images. (GA criteria) The AfPak War section pictures to be fixed. Also note that Left-aligned images should not be placed at the start of subsections.
 * Done. Mni9791 (talk) 13:05, 4 July 2011 (UTC)
 * Electronscope44 (talk) 14:07, 4 July 2011 (UTC)


 * All fair-use images need a fair use rationale. (GA criteria)
 * Images need succinct captions. (GA criteria)
 * An image caption should only end with a full-stop if it forms a complete sentence. (GA criteria)
 * Statements that are likely to be challenged and statistics need inline citations. (GA criteria)
 * Book references need the author, publishing date and page number. (GA criteria)
 * Book references preferably should include the publisher, city of publication and ISBN.❌ This is preferred but I am not going to stress it because this article even includes Google Books hyperlinks to the pages of the book.
 * Web references need the author, publisher, publishing date and access date. (GA criteria)
 * Blogs and personal websites are not reliable sources, unless written by the subject of the article or by an expert on the subject. (GA criteria)
 * Dead web references should not be removed, unless replaced.
 * Inline citations belong immediately after punctuation marks. (GA criteria)
 * Portal links belong in the "See also" section. This article does not have a see also section. But, like the Obama page, this article is so well-linked there is no need for a See Also section. So the portals belong in the External links section which this article does.
 * "Further info" links belong at the top of sections. (GA criteria) This article could one day become a featured article if it has adds more further info sections.
 * Lists should only be included if they can't be made into prose or their own article. (GA criteria)
 * Lists within prose should be avoided. (GA criteria)
 * En dashes are used for ranges, unspaced em dashes or spaced en dashes are used for punctuation.
 * Imperial measurements should be accompanied by the metric equivalent in brackets, and vice versa. If possible, use a conversion template, eg. 5 mi.
 * Whole numbers under 10 should be spelled out as words, except when in lists, tables or infoboxes.
 * Sentences should not start with a numeral. The sentence should be recast or the number should be spelled out.
 * Only the first word in a section heading needs a capital letter (except in proper nouns).
 * Short sections and paragraphs are discouraged. (GA criteria) Generally, alright. I understand this article has a lot of different aspects of Zardari to handle. But improve the Afpak War section and Reduction of Presidential powers section.
 * Done. Mni9791 (talk) 13:06, 4 July 2011 (UTC)
 * Electronscope44 (talk) 14:07, 4 July 2011 (UTC)


 * Ampersands should not be used (except when in a name, eg., Marks & Spencer)
 * "Past few years" has a different meaning to "last few years".
 * "within" has a different meaning to "in".
 * Initials in people's names need full-stops.
 * Hyphens shouldn't be placed after -ly words, eg. widely-used word (except if the ly- word could also describe the noun, e.g. friendly-looking man)
 * Most other two-word adjectives need hyphens.
 * "century" doesn't have a capital.
 * "While" should only be used when emphasizing that two events occur at the same time, or when emphasising contrast. It shouldn't be used as an additive link.
 * Using "with" as an additive link leads to wordy and awkward prose, e.g. "the town has ten councillors, with one being the district mayor" → "the town has ten councillors; one is the district mayor"
 * Beginning a sentence with "there", when "there" doesn't stand for anything, leads to wordy prose, e.g. There are ten houses in the village → The village has ten houses. The same applies to "it".
 * The words "current", "recent" & "to date" should be avoided as they become outdated. (GA criteria) The use of "current" is allowed in the first sentence because of the Obama page precedent.
 * Avoid using "not", eg. "songs previously not heard" → "songs previously unheard"
 * Avoid contractions, such as can’t, he's or they're.
 * Avoid Weasel Words, such as "it is believed that", "is widely regarded as", "some have claimed". (GA criteria)
 * Avoid Peacock Terms, such as "beautiful", "important" and "obvious". (GA criteria)
 * Avoid informal words, such as "carry out", "pub", "though", "tremendous" and "bigger".
 * Avoid phrases with redundant words, such as "is located in", "the two are both", "they brought along", "they have plans to", "they were all part of", "the last ones to form", "both the towns", "outside of the town", "all of the towns", "received some donations", "still exists today", "it also includes others", "many different towns", "near to the town", "available records show", "to help limit the chance", "Christian church", "in order to", "first began", "joined together", "future plans" and "in the year 2007".
 * Avoid using the words "circa", "utilize", "whilst", "upon", "commence", "the majority of", "lack", "whereas", "generate", "due to the fact that" and "prior to".