Talk:Badshahi Mosque/GA1

GA Review
The edit link for this section can be used to add comments to the review.''

Reviewer: Ugog Nizdast (talk · contribs) 10:06, 21 April 2015 (UTC)

Nominator: Royroydeb (talk · contribs) 17:24, 25 March 2015 (UTC)

GA review – see WP:WIAGA for criteria Just the writing part and general structure needs improvement. 10:24, 22 April 2015 (UTC)
 * 1) Is it reasonably well written?
 * A. Prose is "clear and concise", without copyvios, or spelling and grammar errors:
 * Issues addressed 10:46, 8 May 2015 (UTC)
 * B. MoS compliance for lead, layout, words to watch, fiction, and lists:
 * Issues addressed 10:46, 8 May 2015 (UTC)
 * 1) Is it factually accurate and verifiable?
 * A. Has an appropriate reference section:
 * B. Citations to reliable sources, where necessary:
 * C. No original research:
 * 1) Is it broad in its coverage?
 * A. Major aspects:
 * B. Focused (see summary style):
 * 1) Is it neutral?
 * Fair representation without bias:
 * aye
 * 1) Is it stable?
 * No edit wars, etc:
 * 1) Does it contain images to illustrate the topic?
 * A. Images are tagged with their copyright status, and valid fair use rationales are provided for non-free content:
 * B. Images are provided if possible and are relevant to the topic, and have suitable captions:
 * 1) Overall:
 * Pass or Fail:
 * All comments below have been addressed. Ugog Nizdast (talk) 10:46, 8 May 2015 (UTC)
 * 1) Does it contain images to illustrate the topic?
 * A. Images are tagged with their copyright status, and valid fair use rationales are provided for non-free content:
 * B. Images are provided if possible and are relevant to the topic, and have suitable captions:
 * 1) Overall:
 * Pass or Fail:
 * All comments below have been addressed. Ugog Nizdast (talk) 10:46, 8 May 2015 (UTC)
 * Pass or Fail:
 * All comments below have been addressed. Ugog Nizdast (talk) 10:46, 8 May 2015 (UTC)


 * Main
 * Split the History section in year-based subsections like: "1671-1848", "1849-1973", "1974-present" (might have made a mistake with the dates, correct accordingly) since Mughal-Sikh, British and Modern seem less ideal.
 * ✅ RRD13 দেবজ্যোতি (talk) 10:33, 24 April 2015 (UTC)


 * Could any more be mentioned about Aurangazeb? It's the only monument built by him right? and that too at the decline of the empire? Didn't it affect his empire financially too? what about the inspiration from the Jama Masjid and the floral stucco-decorated interior in the Features section?
 * Nothing is much pertinent about Aurangzeb, nothing is more present. He came to the throne in 1658 and that time the empire was not running out of money, which became in the later half of his reign when he was waging useless wars against Bijapur and Golconda. I've also added that similar one information. RRD13 দেবজ্যোতি (talk) 10:49, 24 April 2015 (UTC)


 * Lead: Could be expanded with the mention of its features, The Tomb of Muhammad Iqbal and about Aurangazeb (how and when he made it).
 * ✅ RRD13 দেবজ্যোতি (talk) 11:04, 24 April 2015 (UTC)


 * Entire article switches between Mosque/Fort->mosque/fort, it should be the latter. Visual editor has a good ctrl+F search and replace option.


 * The second part of this statement is confusing "In 1993, the Government of Pakistan recommended the inclusion of the Badshahi Mosque as a World Heritage Site in UNESCO's World Heritage List, where it has been included in Pakistan's Tentative List for possible nomination to the World Heritage List by UNESCO. what is it's present status? it's only in Pakistan's list for recommendation for UNESCO right? then mention just that.
 * ✅ RRD13 দেবজ্যোতি (talk) 11:14, 24 April 2015 (UTC)
 * I get it now. It needs rewording. Take a look at this; body: " Government of Pakistan included the Badshahi Mosque in the tentative list for UNESCO World Heritage Site." versus lead "In 1993, the Government of Pakistan recommended the inclusion of the mosque as a World Heritage Site in UNESCO's World Heritage List, where it has been included in Pakistan's Tentative List for possible nomination to the World Heritage List by UNESCO.". Both led to me getting confused. From the former statement, I get that the government added it to its list for recommendation to the UNESCO, right? The latter one should then be shortened like this. -Ugog Nizdast (talk) 11:14, 5 May 2015 (UTC)
 * It is in the tentative list, which is another kind of list maintained. It is not in the main one. ✅ RRD13 দেবজ্যোতি (talk) 17:31, 7 May 2015 (UTC)


 * "rebuilt them to form open arcades or dalans, which continue to this day " what is the relevance of this part?
 * The british rebuilt them, and they exsist till now, I mean they are not damaged. RRD13 দেবজ্যোতি (talk) 06:34, 2 May 2015 (UTC)
 * Then there's no need to add that they still exist (it is assumed so unless otherwise mentioned). -Ugog Nizdast (talk) 11:14, 5 May 2015 (UTC)
 * ✅ RRD13 দেবজ্যোতি (talk) 17:37, 7 May 2015 (UTC)


 * " It was not until 1852 that the British established the Badshahi Mosque Authority to oversee the restoration of the mosque so that it could be returned to Muslims as a place of worship. Although repairs were carried out, it was not until 1939 that extensive repairs began under the oversight of architect Nawab Zen Yar Jang Bahadur. the Mosque is now almost restored to its original 17th century condition" Isn't this part already mentioned in the above para? Reword the last part to just "remains almost fully restored", it sounds too informal.
 * ✅ RRD13 দেবজ্যোতি (talk) 08:17, 3 May 2015 (UTC)


 * "Sensing increasing Muslim resentment against the use of the Mosque as a military garrison, which was continuing since Sikh Rule, the British set up the Badshahi Mosque Authority in 1852 to oversee the restoration and return of the Mosque to Muslims as a place of religious worship.", ->just "return it as a place of worship" is fine, marked parts can be removed and entire statement reworded.
 * ✅RRD13 দেবজ্যোতি (talk) 09:17, 3 May 2015 (UTC)
 * Did some minor ce over that too. However, the two sentences "Because of increasing..." and "It was not until 1852..." are duplicates. -Ugog Nizdast (talk) 11:14, 5 May 2015 (UTC)
 * ✅ RRD13 দেবজ্যোতি (talk) 17:45, 7 May 2015 (UTC)


 * " Weapons were stored in the minarets during Sikh rule." already mentioned previously.
 * ✅RRD13 দেবজ্যোতি (talk) 09:17, 3 May 2015 (UTC)


 * " The mosque was constructed by the sixth Mughal emperor Aurangzeb who was not a patron of art and architecture, which the other Mughal rulers had patronised. "-> "unlike the previous rulers".
 * ✅ RRD13 দেবজ্যোতি (talk) 09:17, 3 May 2015 (UTC)


 * The following have WP:PEA words. Ideally they should not be stated in the encyclopaedia's voice and be attributed as to who said them (WP:ATTRIBUTEPOV): "the excellence of Mughal architecture" and "Epitomising the beauty, passion and grandeur of the Mughal era". -Ugog Nizdast (talk) 10:27, 22 April 2015 (UTC)
 * ✅ RRD13 দেবজ্যোতি (talk) 09:22, 3 May 2015 (UTC)
 * I've forgot to point out some more: Do the same for "but never regained its original architectural splendour" and "...and "balanced proportions and clarity"" unless you really need to quote them. -Ugog Nizdast (talk) 11:14, 5 May 2015 (UTC)

Images: All current images licenses look fine to me though I'm unsure about File:Maharajah Duleep Singh (1838-1893), entering his palace in Lahore, escorted by British troops.jpg which has only a UK PD license. A US license may be needed since the servers are in the US but given my lack of knowledge regarding this license thing, and also noting that it was uploaded way back in 2008, I think it's fine.

I've looked through again on what I said in the last review at Talk:Jama Masjid, Delhi/GA1 regarding not allowing Image galleries. I've made a mistake, it's not even part of the GA criteria and it says galleries are justifiable in some exceptions. I think this is one of them, and adding galleries to both these architecture articles seems to be a good idea. It will reduce images being crammed near the text and will supplement in the explanation of the building's architecture. So, if you want to, choose a good variety of different images from the Commons showing each view of the entire mosque. Also, you can further reduce the cramming of images in the text. -Ugog Nizdast (talk) 09:57, 24 April 2015 (UTC)
 * The other images present are nothing but the mosque in sunlight, sunset etc which is of least pertinence in an encyclopedia. RRD13 দেবজ্যোতি (talk) 09:22, 3 May 2015 (UTC)
 * ,Hi I am on a wikibreak till 29th, so I hope you can keep this review on till then and excuse me. RRD13 দেবজ্যোতি (talk) 05:50, 26 April 2015 (UTC)
 * Of course, time is rarely an issue. If there's any change in your break if you're delayed further, tell me. -Ugog Nizdast (talk) 06:48, 26 April 2015 (UTC)
 * , Hi I have addressed all the issues. RRD13 দেবজ্যোতি (talk) 09:22, 3 May 2015 (UTC)

Some more...this should be it.
 * Eveything in the lead can be trimmed and merged into one para. "The courtyard which...can be accommodated inside the mosque. " Shorten it to how it's done in the body, Intro statement too long, split it into two, and "It is located in Lahore," is already mentioned.
 * ✅ RRD13 দেবজ্যোতি (talk) 19:20, 5 May 2015 (UTC)


 * For better context, reword it to "one of the 13 Roshnai gates",
 * ✅ RRD13 দেবজ্যোতি (talk) 07:38, 6 May 2015 (UTC)


 * Image:Tomb of Muhammad Iqbal can be removed since it's only relevant to its own page and we need place here. Optionally, the stubby Location section can be merged with the features.
 * ✅ - The location has an a separate identity. RRD13 দেবজ্যোতি (talk) 07:38, 6 May 2015 (UTC)


 * Do the relics consist of both of their hairs? what's the original wording? If both, then the current wording is fine just hope my grammar is right.
 * It is said that the contain the hairs of the two, like the one in Hazratbal Shrine. RRD13 দেবজ্যোতি (talk) 08:12, 6 May 2015 (UTC)


 * Reword these quotations, they can be explained in regular prose. "...stairway "that leads sthrough a great vaulted entrance" which is constructed..." "red sandstone "with an open, marble-covered canopy"." and ""is dominated by a central arched niche"". Shouldn't quote unless you really need to, paraphrase the rest of the time.
 * ✅ RRD13 দেবজ্যোতি (talk) 08:12, 6 May 2015 (UTC)


 * One minor thing about the captions. It's redundant to mention the article subject in them unless it's not obvious, thus "Layout of the mosque" can be changed to just "Layout". Do the same for the rest of them. -Ugog Nizdast (talk) 11:14, 5 May 2015 (UTC)
 * ✅ RRD13 দেবজ্যোতি (talk) 08:12, 6 May 2015 (UTC)


 * , I have worked on the pending stuffs. RRD13 দেবজ্যোতি (talk) 17:45, 7 May 2015 (UTC)


 * There's just one minor thing left, these two sentences: "Because of increasing Muslim resentment...re-establish it as a place of religious worship." and "It was not until... place of worship." are duplicates. That shouldn't keep this waiting so I pass this. Good luck with your other noms. -Ugog Nizdast (talk) 10:46, 8 May 2015 (UTC)