Talk:Johor

Not quite a peer review
Looking at other GA candidates in the assessment queue, this one caught my attention. Doing a GA review is well above my pay grade but maybe I can make some helpful notes? (But to my inexperienced eye, if this is not a GA, my own nomination has no hope!) I wouldn't pretend that these comments are a proper peer review but they may help avoid a fall at the first fence.--John Maynard Friedman (talk) 19:53, 17 April 2019 (UTC)

Protectorate

 * Although I am sure that people who live in the area would distinguish sea from land at a glance, it took me a minute or two. So I wonder if I might suggest a paler blue for the sea and grey instead of white for the irrelevant land? Also, bearing in mind how common red green colour blindness is, either the green or the red needs changing. Probably the green, given the colour used for Singapore. Also, I note that islands are coloured but not labelled. The 'Johor Labelled Map' is an example of good practice. ✅


 * The GA criteria don't like red links, so if Douglas Graham Campbell is not notable enough for an article, remove the wlink. --John Maynard Friedman (talk) 19:53, 17 April 2019 (UTC) ✅

Second world war

 * Should Battle of Singapore be in the list of relevant main articles? ✅


 * 'Abolishment'? I think you mean abolition. (I would write 'Following the abolition of the ...', to make clear it is following the abolition not of the enactment'). ✅


 * 'The Japanese also established the Endau Settlement ... despite many massacres of Chinese and Malay civilians ' It is not explained how these two facts are related, nor is it obvious. Was the Settlement supposed to be a consolation prize? or were the Japanese unrealistic to expect a productive settlement? --John Maynard Friedman (talk) 19:53, 17 April 2019 (UTC) ✅

Post war

 * "At the start of the war, the British had accepted ... " (since at this stage in the narrative the war is over). ✅


 * '... to establish a Communist state similar to the victories ...' How is a state similar to victories? Why not just put 'similar to the PRC'? ✅


 * 'its secretary-general, Lai Teck (who was also a double agent for the British), ' needs citation. The article on him is no help, just more uncited assertions. ✅


 * 'Fighting between the British/Malayan forces and Communist insurgents'. Insurgent is Loaded language. I doubt that 'Fighting between the British occupation forces and their Malayan collaborators against the People's Army' would be acceptable but the language is essentially the same. --John Maynard Friedman (talk) 19:53, 17 April 2019 (UTC) ✅

Conservation issues

 * the 'take' rate of indigenous hunters is asserted but not cited, ✅, sentence removed
 * this question may underline that I know nothing about Johor, but is there not an issue on tropical hardwoods? potentially medicinal plants? forest clearances for palm-oil plantations? --John Maynard Friedman (talk) 19:53, 17 April 2019 (UTC) ✅, section merged with biodiversity

Energy and water resources

 * Gallons? US or UK? What is that in cubic metres? ✅
 * does Singapore really supply the whole state with drinking water, or just to some settlements? --John Maynard Friedman (talk) 19:53, 17 April 2019 (UTC) ✅


 * ✅ for some. I will do the rest in the shortest time! Thanks for the suggestion for improvement! Molecule Extraction (talk) 07:52, 15 May 2019 (UTC)
 * Fully done. Most issues have been addressed. Molecule Extraction (talk) 03:57, 22 August 2019 (UTC)

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