User talk:Sulfurboy/Archive 2

02:57:43, 25 July 2015 review of submission by Oliver.D-56
Hello Sulfurboy,

I have tried to correct the page, based on your inputs. Thank you for the reviewing of it. Please, can you help with the editing of the info box? I've looked around Wikipedia to learn how to do it, but I didn't find it.

Best regards,

Oliver.D-56 (talk) 02:57, 25 July 2015 (UTC)
 * It seems the infobox is fixed now and the article is neat and sourced but I would still add more further sources you have to fully establish independent notability. SwisterTwister   talk  06:23, 26 July 2015 (UTC)

13:34:58, 26 July 2015 review of submission by Omeradam1993
{{SAFESUBST:Void|

Hello Sulfurboy, I don't understand why you have declined my request for "Maharan Frozenfar" Wikipedia page. I have added multiply sources about his career and his important rule in the Israeli Defence Forces. I have added various sources from: DefenseNews, Jerusalem Post, Reuters, Globes, Haaretz and more, and information taken from his offical website - All of these sources confirm that all the information is currect, and represet his notablity. Furthermore, Maharan already has a page in Wikipedia in Hebrew and in Persian, that consider the same content: https://he.wikipedia.org/wiki/%D7%9E%D7%94%D7%A8%D7%9F_%D7%A4%D7%A8%D7%95%D7%96%D7%A0%D7%A4%D7%A8 https://fa.wikipedia.org/wiki/%D9%85%D9%87%D8%B1%D8%A7%D9%86_%D9%81%D8%B1%D9%88%D8%B2%D8%A7%D9%86%D9%81%D8%B1

Please consider approve the request.

Thank you,

Omeradam1993 (talk) 13:34, 26 July 2015 (UTC)

08:25:43, 27 July 2015 review of submission by 89.145.233.90
Hi there, thanks for reviewing the article. To be honest I am a bit disappointed it didn't meet the criteria since I read all the rules and spent quite a bit of time on the life chat making sure it stands a chance of being published.

The first time I submitted, I was told that the references weren't strong enough, so I replaced them with independent media ones compared to blogger references. I though media such as 'The Telegraph' and the 'Independent' are fairly strong testimonials. I am really confused of why they are still not good.

In terms of the writing style, I used other, similar articles as a guide and I thought that the language is neutral. However I will review it again to make sure there isn't any promotional voice.

Please could you give me some more guidance on these points so I can edit them and resubmit the article. Your support is much appreciated.

Best, Dorotea

89.145.233.90 (talk) 08:25, 27 July 2015 (UTC)

08:27:47, 27 July 2015 review of submission by 89.145.233.90
Hi there, thanks for reviewing the article. To be honest I am a bit disappointed it didn't meet the criteria since I read all the rules and spent quite a bit of time on the life chat making sure it stands a chance of being published.

The first time I submitted, I was told that the references weren't strong enough, so I replaced them with independent media ones compared to blogger references. I though media such as 'The Telegraph' and the 'Independent' are fairly strong testimonials. I am really confused of why they are still not good.

In terms of the writing style, I used other, similar articles as a guide and I thought that the language is neutral. However I will review it again to make sure there isn't any promotional voice.

Please could you give me some more guidance on these points so I can edit them and resubmit the article. Your support is much appreciated.

Best, Dorotea

ps. I am referring to the article: Personal Oversea Development https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Draft:Personal_Overseas_Development#Pod_Volunteer

89.145.233.90 (talk) 08:27, 27 July 2015 (UTC)

14:48:47, 27 July 2015 review of submission by 50.246.212.53
50.246.212.53 (talk) 14:48, 27 July 2015 (UTC)

My submission was recently declined because it does not show the subjects notability. I was just curious what I could add to improve it because currently it includes articles from INC 500, Bloomberg, and Boulderopolis.

Thank you!

Road Recovery
Hello,

You posted on https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Draft:Road_Recovery that the comments about Gene Bowen need to be sourced and cited. All information about Gene Bowen was written by the man himself. How am I supposed to cite that?

Thank you

Roadrecovery (talk) 15:53, 22 July 2015 (UTC) That's fine just use the same source to cite each statement.Sulfurboy (talk) 20:46, 22 July 2015 (UTC)

How should I cite word of mouth? Roadrecovery (talk) 15:43, 27 July 2015 (UTC)

19:49:17, 27 July 2015 review of submission by Sharktrager442
Hi Sulfurboy - I'm fairly new to article writing here. Please can you let me know what areas need further work on the Ari Norman article. All information is correct, so wondered which areas still need citations. Many thanks SharkSharktrager442 (talk) 19:49, 27 July 2015 (UTC) Sharktrager442 (talk) 19:49, 27 July 2015 (UTC)
 * Any substantial claim needs a backing source the career and on are very much lacking. Sulfurboy (talk) 23:55, 27 July 2015 (UTC)

Draft:Capability_Maturity_Model_Cybersecurity
Dear Sulpurboy,

When an new article is submitted in draft, does it present for review automatically, or do I have to do something? Please see the below link for my new article, for review. Also, since I am sure there are many persons performing reviews for Wikipedia, I was wondering if there was a way to have you review this article, since you have previous experience specific to CMM, from your previous reviews of articles of this nature. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Draft:Capability_Maturity_Model_Cybersecurity CMM Cybersecurity

Thank you in advance, Sean Connors --Sean p connors (talk) 17:56, 27 July 2015 (UTC)
 * You don't have the formatted AfC box on the page. Reread the AfC guidelines to find it. And then yes you need to manually submit it. However I can tell you right now your article would fail. It reads more like a brochureSulfurboy (talk) 23:56, 27 July 2015 (UTC) and is highly advertismal.

Copyright issues
Dear Sulfurboy,

Thank you for your message about the page I've tried to create for Janus Pannonius Poetry Prize. I have some copyright issues, I fully understand why it is problematic; however, I would like to ask whether it is possible to leave the page and its contents as it is now if I have the written support of the Hungarian PEN Club that proves that I can use the booklet and its contents to create the site? I can attach the letter for you to read anytime you wish! The link: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Draft:Janus_Pannonius_Grand_Prize_for_Poetry Thank you again in advance, Franciska78 (talk)Franciska78
 * I cannot help you with that, you need to provide the sourcing and permission rights via the proper channel. I don't do CV material reviews. But yes, your draft is safe and won't be deleted before it can be reviewed. Thanks. Sulfurboy (talk) 00:09, 28 July 2015 (UTC)

13:48:31, 27 July 2015 review of submission by Hkb
Hkb (talk) 13:48, 27 July 2015 (UTC)

Thanks for your feedback. In terms of notability, Ros Schwartz has been awarded Legion d'honneur (from the French government) and various national prizes (UK), and I have put references to all of these. In terms of her contribution to the field, the best way to show this is by her publications and representation in important organisations.
 * Those things don't auto qualify someone for an article. Please review my comments that I already provided for what needs to be done. Sulfurboy (talk) 00:12, 28 July 2015 (UTC)

13:20:12, 27 July 2015 review of submission by TCVCJ
You have thoroughly convinced me that this proposed article should be a paragraph in the already published piece on SR16! However, I hesitate to edit the piece as much as it would need to include the paragraph. And I'm not exactly sure how to do the inclusion - must it be in the same form as an original article with the references included in the body? I would sincerely appreciate your help!TCVCJ (talk) 13:20, 27 July 2015 (UTC) TCVCJ (talk) 13:20, 27 July 2015 (UTC)
 * Feel free to edit away on your own. If something you do is in some way wrong it will eventually be caught by another editor. Good luck. Sulfurboy (talk) 00:13, 28 July 2015 (UTC)

10:50:49, 27 July 2015 review of submission by DSI EH
Dear reviewer,

I already added independant references to our wiki article. Can you please be more specific and tell me exactly which references should i edit/add.

Kind regards

DSI EH (talk) 10:50, 27 July 2015 (UTC) EH

DSI EH (talk) 10:50, 27 July 2015 (UTC)
 * We need to see substantial, independent coverage of the company itself. The articles listed just mention in in a routine or passing manner. Sulfurboy (talk) 00:14, 28 July 2015 (UTC)

Peter Dangerfield
I think I have made the required improvements for this article. Could you please review again. Thanks.Gomach (talk) 08:51, 26 July 2015 (UTC)
 * For maintence tags, you can remove them yourself if you feel the issue has been resolved. You don't need my permission. Sulfurboy (talk) 00:30, 28 July 2015 (UTC)

Fun School Discussion
Greetings, I should like an additional opinion based on the Fun School series at Articles for deletion/Fun School 6. You may wish to examine the articles what with the recent edits I made to establish notability. Any concrete suggestions you can give would be highly appreciated. Deltasim (talk) 08:50, 26 July 2015 (UTC)
 * From what I can tell, the best case scenario is to merge them into one, well put together article. Sulfurboy (talk) 00:31, 28 July 2015 (UTC)

00:42:21, 25 July 2015 review of submission by Milkeung
Thanks for your comments about the submission. We are revising the submission and deleted unnecessary sentences. It would be great if you can advise us further in this process.

Also, do Wikipedia usually accept submission about industry collaboration project, like this one? Such initiative is beneficial to industry participants.

Milkeung (talk) 00:42, 25 July 2015 (UTC) Who is we? Wikipedia accounts should not be shared in the manner you seem to be suggesting by what you said. Sulfurboy (talk) 00:32, 28 July 2015 (UTC)

I have unreviewed a page you curated
Hi, I'm Hippychickali. I wanted to let you know that I saw the page you reviewed, Miloš Milovanović, and have un-reviewed it again. If you have any questions, please ask them on my talk page. Thank you. Hippychick (talk) 22:17, 24 July 2015 (UTC)
 * What was the purpose in unreviewing it? Sulfurboy (talk) 00:37, 28 July 2015 (UTC)

FYI
A page you accepted at AFC, Kim Nam-joon, is currently up for deletion at AfD, in case you're interested. Articles for deletion/Kim Namjoon. Joseph2302 (talk) 23:01, 24 July 2015 (UTC)
 * Thanks for pointing this out. Sulfurboy (talk) 00:37, 28 July 2015 (UTC)

18:28, 26 July 2015 (UTC) Review of submission by Reaason
Thank you for reviewing my draft (twice) at

I'm trying to establish, whether I should keep working on it or not. Basically, I've read the notability criteria for musicians and ensembles and asked for advice at the Teahouse (my question) and I'm still not sure.

As far as I can see, the subject of my draft meets (at least) the criteria defined in sections 1, 2 and 11. Would you agree with this and is it enough in terms of notability?

As for the sources, I think the ones used in the article are some of the most independent and reliable in the Finnish and Swedish context. Was the lack of sources in English(?) the/a primary reason for the rejection? Anything else that contributed to that decision?

Thank you, have a good day! :) Reaason (talk) 18:28, 26 July 2015 (UTC)
 * What sections are you talking about? Sulfurboy (talk) 00:24, 28 July 2015 (UTC)
 * I was referring to the numbered items under notability criteria for musicians and ensembles. Thanks. Reaason (talk) 10:35, 28 July 2015 (UTC)
 * I disagree on 1 and 11, but it does pass 2. I'll approve it. Thanks. Sulfurboy (talk) 13:41, 28 July 2015 (UTC)

03:43, 22 July 2015 review of Creative Mobile - Draft page by RadRacer20xx
Hi Sulfurboy - Thanks for looking at the article draft on Creative Mobile The article was not accepted due to This submission's references do not adequately show the subject's notability

I've made some edits and included more reference citations, can you review and make any further comments on how to improve the article for approval?

I believe everything should qualify for approval in comparison to articles for similar game studios: Halfbrick Studios, Kiloo, Backflip Studios,  Rovio Entertainment

Thanks! User:RadRacer20xx 13:27, 28 July 2015‎
 * Press releases need to be removed. They are not considered credible sources. Further we need to see independent, substantial coverage of the company itself, not just articles that mention it in pass or as a routine mention due to the games. Sulfurboy (talk) 13:47, 28 July 2015 (UTC)


 * Thanks for your quick reply, I've removed the press releases and have included more references from independant / international media coverage regarding the company specifically. If there are no further corrections needed I will proceed to resubmit. RadRacer20xx 11:21, 30 July 2015‎

07:56:01, 28 July 2015 review of submission by Rye Giggs
Hi, Sulfurboy.

Thanks for your kindly review of the article, please share me more information about what kind of the references do we need to provide to verify the information, or can you tell me more about which information do we need to add reference to verify.

Thanks in advance!

Rye Giggs (talk) 07:56, 28 July 2015 (UTC) Reviews by software review sites aren't really considered to show notability, as they are routine and done for any piece of software. We need to see independent coverage of the impact of the software and why it is notable and important enough to be in an encyclopedia. Sulfurboy (talk) 13:48, 28 July 2015 (UTC)

14:32:25, 28 July 2015 review of submission by CinaedThePict
CinaedThePict (talk) 14:32, 28 July 2015 (UTC)

Can you clarify what 'Please clarify between the references and sources so we can confirm this custom.' means? This isn't readily evident - I can assure you (as a Scot), it's a long established custom, and I'm very happy to link to additional video footage if needbe.
 * Meaning you should combine and format the reference and sources section. Sulfurboy (talk) 14:36, 28 July 2015 (UTC)

Declined- What exactly is wrong with my inline citations?
Hi Sulfurboy, Thank you for reviewing my page https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Draft:David_Richter. As the person aboved me has requested, do you mind specifically telling me what's wrong with my inline citations? I ask just so I know I am doing the write thing before I go through the process of adding and editing again. The facts (awards, education, ect.) are backed up by the citations I have, so when you get a chance please let me know the mistake I've made. Thanks, Keelsh01 (talk) 19:46, 24 July 2015 (UTC)
 * Looks like you fixed the citations. Good job. There is one more issues we have with PRs. Please see the page for mroe info. Sulfurboy (talk) 21:25, 24 July 2015 (UTC)
 * Thanks Sulfurboy, I fixed the sources that used press releases and added more reliable sources. Let me know how it looks now! Keelsh01 (talk) 13:14, 27 July 2015 (UTC)
 * Hi Sulfurboy, I have worked diligently to fix both citation problems. Can you please approve my article or direct me otherwise? Thanks, Keelsh01 (talk) 14:43, 28 July 2015 (UTC)
 * Done. Sulfurboy (talk) 14:46, 28 July 2015 (UTC)

Hi Sulfur Boy.thank you for reviewing but please help me in publishing my article. Drphanichalla

15:11:10, 28 July 2015 review of submission by Cary.tanaka
I am confused as to how our references are unacceptable, as they are all links with credible postings from third parties outside of the company. I would like to know what we can do to improve the page. Thanks. Cary.tanaka (talk) 15:11, 28 July 2015 (UTC)
 * As was already stated in a previous decline, you need to remove the press releases. Also the tone of the article needs to be neutral and formal which it is not. Reads more like a company's about page than an encyclopedic article. Sulfurboy (talk) 15:12, 28 July 2015 (UTC)

16:32:02, 28 July 2015 review of submission by 195.110.76.194
I don't understand why the notability or verification of this person has been declined, they are an elected politician with a number of controversial actions which have all bee linked, including the link to offical counil pages to verify: http://committees.westminster.gov.uk/mgUserInfo.aspx?UID=152

195.110.76.194 (talk) 16:32, 28 July 2015 (UTC)
 * Please reference WP:NPOL and WP:GNG Sulfurboy (talk) 16:34, 28 July 2015 (UTC)

Wrapping up second round of edits for RW3 Page
Afternoon Sulfurboy. I got some help from the Wiki community and made a good amount of edits on the RW3 Technologies page. Looking forward to your comments.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Draft:RW3_Technologies

Cheers,
 * I think it is borderline, so I am going to allow another editor to review it. The backlog isn't bad so it should only be a couple days. Sulfurboy (talk) 17:12, 28 July 2015 (UTC)

A kitten for you!
Thank you for publishing my article on the North Central RTD! Here's a kitten for you, because kittens are amazing. P.S. It looks like this is showing up on your talk page, and I can't figure out how to send it to your user page instead. I'm new to this. Sorry.

Imagine Dragonflies (talk) 17:11, 28 July 2015 (UTC) 
 * Haha, that's okay. I'll move it. Thank you! Sulfurboy (talk) 17:13, 28 July 2015 (UTC)

17:16:08, 28 July 2015 review of submission by Gautamrajeev
Hey, I wanted to know how many citations I need to get an article on Wikipedia. I sent 3 citations, two of them from India's leading national dailies- The Hindu and Deccan Herald. I haven't made any huge claims without citing. How much more is required? Gautamrajeev (talk) 17:16, 28 July 2015 (UTC) Gautamrajeev (talk) 17:16, 28 July 2015 (UTC)
 * Those two sources only mention the org in passing. It's not an actual profile article about it. The third source is a blog which is questionably reliable. We need to see substantial coverage from independent and reliable sources, however many or few sources that takes. Sulfurboy (talk) 17:19, 28 July 2015 (UTC)

17:28:44, 28 July 2015 review of submission by Ruffsl
Ruffsl (talk) 17:28, 28 July 2015 (UTC)

Just like to ask for some aid the revision for the draft Draf tGazebo_simulator.

My goal is to keep the article short and factual similar in style to existing example open source articles:


 * Bullet_(software)
 * Player_Project
 * Robot_Operating_System

If you have detailed specifics on this matter, or know of an editor knowledgeable in the subject, please do not hesitate to inform.

Thanks Ruffsl (talk) 17:28, 28 July 2015 (UTC)

A kitten for you!
Thank you for your very helpful comments to improve Amazingrace Coffeehouse. So far I have been able to add the InfoBox and extend links. Will tackle formatting next, if you can just specify for me which aspects you feel are not in the proper Wikipedia style.

VerySeldom (talk) 17:58, 28 July 2015 (UTC) 
 * I did some more cleanup. Looks good now. Now all that is left is to find a couple other articles to link to it. You would probably know better than me where to find some. Sulfurboy (talk) 18:20, 28 July 2015 (UTC)

Request on 19:01:53, 28 July 2015 for assistance on AfC submission by Lakshitha Chathuranga Wikramage
please, I have made my "Lakshitha Wikramage" article with every steps INCLUDING REFERENCE catogory also. I requested 3 times to accept my page. please accept it. I have done it taking my valuable time. please..!

Lakshitha Chathuranga Wikramage (talk) 19:01, 28 July 2015 (UTC)
 * You need to follow the linked policies to see what are acceptable sources. Sulfurboy (talk) 19:03, 28 July 2015 (UTC)

19:59:38, 28 July 2015 review of submission by Cleaver37
Cleaver37 (talk) 19:59, 28 July 2015 (UTC) Hi not sure how to reference my article. I am the founder of the club.... (Cleaver37 (talk) 19:59, 28 July 2015 (UTC))
 * Links to resources are given in the declined message on the draft page. Sulfurboy (talk) 20:01, 28 July 2015 (UTC)

Draft Question
Hi Sulfurboy,

When you need a break from new page patrol, can you please advise me on how to better improve my draft? I took your recommendation and created a sandbox draft for it: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/User:Sjane214/sandbox

If you have free time, can you please let me know how to better improve it? Sjane214 (talk) 19:09, 28 July 2015 (UTC)

To start, you need independent, reliable sources that show substantial coverage of the center. Also, remove the external links within the article and either add them to an exlinks section if they're directly relevant, or otherwise just scrap them. Sulfurboy (talk) 19:12, 28 July 2015 (UTC)

Thank you for the response Sulfurboy! I have created an External Links section and found sources. Here is the link to my draft: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Draft:The_Center_for_Healthcare_Innovation Once again, if you have time, can you please let me know if I fixed the link/reference/any other type of problem? I know you don't have to review this draft so thank you for the first response! Sjane214 (talk) 20:03, 28 July 2015 (UTC)

21:23:53, 28 July 2015 review of submission by Tim B Haigh
Hello there, would it be possible to give me some assistance with this ? Can you give me an example of where "The content of this submission includes material that does not meet Wikipedia's minimum standard for inline citations. " so that I can understand where I have gone wrong with my first article?

Many thanks for your help. Tim

Tim B Haigh (talk) 21:23, 28 July 2015 (UTC)
 * Hey Tim, with biographies of living people we have very strict standards when it comes to inline citations. Particularly, we would like to see a citation for each individual claim (usually at the end of a sentence or point) made about the person. Obviously, you can reuse sources as needed, we don't need a different source for each claim, but we do need to know where to look to confirm the claim being made. Good luck. Sulfurboy (talk) 21:27, 28 July 2015 (UTC)

Draft now has Exlinks section and sources
Thank you once again for the recommendations:) I have incorporated the exlinks section and added additional sources. Is there's anything else I can fix before I re-submit my draft so it can become an article once more?

Here's the link: https://en.wikipedia.org/w/index.php?title=Draft:The_Center_for_Healthcare_Innovation&redirect=no

Sjane214 (talk) 21:19, 28 July 2015 (UTC)
 * I still think it's borderline, but you're welcome to resubmit it and see what another editor thinks. Sulfurboy (talk) 21:28, 28 July 2015 (UTC)

20:20:45, 28 July 2015 review of submission by Aabbott
Hi Sulfurboy. I added the awards that Monica Brown has received and two additional sources to try to prove her notability. Before I put in further edits, could you point me in the right direction? Do you need quotes from and links to book reviews from industry periodicals (Kirkus/PW)? I don't want to keep barking up the wrong tree, but I do think that Brown is a notable author.

Aabbott (talk) 20:20, 28 July 2015 (UTC)
 * The problem is the primary nature of the sources. The first two are interviews which aren't wholly independent. The third one is completely primary as it is written by the subject. The fourth for some reason I am unable to see. We need to see INDEPENDENT, substantial and reliable coverage. Sulfurboy (talk) 21:31, 28 July 2015 (UTC)

22:25:37, 28 July 2015 review of submission by Valery De Smedt
Can you advice me on the page Eric Joris? It has correct references and sources. No abuse of copyright and correct information. Valery De Smedt (talk) 22:25, 28 July 2015 (UTC)
 * As stated in all three of the rejections, you need inline citations. Please stop resubmitting it without fixing it. Sulfurboy (talk) 22:35, 28 July 2015 (UTC)

Precision about the Régis Hauser page.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Régis_Hauser You asked me to improve the sources and to try to ass categories. I've done it. Is that right? (few information exist about him so the sources are few too). — Preceding unsigned comment added by HyperionMaxis (talk • contribs) 23:50, 28 July 2015 (UTC)
 * Done. Sulfurboy (talk) 23:52, 28 July 2015 (UTC)

Request on 02:31:07, 29 July 2015 for assistance on AfC submission by Cht0620
I am wondering if there is any other source of reference I can include besides press release? Because I guess it should be the most credible source? Kindly advise for that! Thanks!

Cht0620 (talk) 02:31, 29 July 2015 (UTC)
 * A press release by proxy is considered a primary source. We need to see credible, significant and reliable SECONDARY coverage. Sulfurboy (talk) 04:10, 29 July 2015 (UTC)

Request on 01:34:51, 29 July 2015 for assistance on AfC submission by 24.184.216.47
Hello Sulfurboy, thanks for your comments. I have been working on making the Wiki page for the book and used content from the book website. As I am the author I thought it would be Ok to use content from there. I have been working hard to make the page neutral, but didn't expect a copyright issue to occur. Do you suggest I change the language on the Wiki page slightly in order to ensure the system doesn't think there is a copyright issue?

I did try to source and link any word-for-word language whenever I used it from Amazon or the book website. — Preceding unsigned comment added by KJacobi1121 (talk • contribs) 01:45, 29 July 2015 (UTC)

Many thanks for your help through this process

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Draft:Going_with_the_Pitch

Ken wiki: KJacobi1121

24.184.216.47 (talk) 01:34, 29 July 2015 (UTC)
 * Everything should be written in your own words. If you are referencing your own words, as seems to be the case, you should go through the proper CV channels to ensure that the source can be used verbatim without issue. Further, wikipedia tries to avoid WP:COI, or conflicts of interest and encourage people to not write about things they are directly connected with for issues such as this. I would advise for full clarity to post on the talk page that you are the author. Sulfurboy (talk) 04:18, 29 July 2015 (UTC)

Request to review AFC submission Draft:Vanguard_Dutch_Marine
hi Graham, Bothering you again with an AFC (this being my second article if selected). Please have a look as and when feasible. Thanks in advance. Devopam (talk) 05:08, 28 July 2015 (UTC)
 * hi Graham, thought of sending you a reminder as your talk page is pretty overwhelmed with requests :). Devopam (talk) 09:34, 29 July 2015 (UTC)

Request on 09:17:39, 29 July 2015 for assistance on AfC submission by Charushr89
Hi, we want to create Wikipedia page for our company HeadHonchos.com (an online search engine portal). After much editing and submissions, we are not getting the final approval on the submitted work. I request you to please specify the areas where we can apply scope of change or improvement. Also, the references used are taken from the verified sources. We have used online sources in support to content/information in regard to HeadHonchos.com as a product/company. Need help so that we can improve on the areas asap. Thank you.

Charushr89 (talk) 09:17, 29 July 2015 (UTC)
 * Due to conflict of interest issues, we highly encourage people directly related with a company or a subject not write an article about it. Beyond that, the article has a long way to go. As you could find in the links provided to you, we need reliable, independent and substantial coverage. The sources provided in the article are basically press releases which is just regurgitated primary sources. Sulfurboy (talk) 12:54, 29 July 2015 (UTC)

What exactly is the criteria for passage at AfC?
I have to say, this is a bit worrying; I've seen your name pop up in two rather disparate topic areas (reality television and American politics) because of AfCs you've marked as passing. The first was Big Brother 18 (U.S.), a future season of a current series that are routinely left as redirects until actual sources exist to say more than "it will air". I had to take it to AfD to enforce a redirect against serial revert-warring IPs and SPAs The second, today, is Alleged Clinton Controversies (also at AfD, where most of the input so far is to speedy delete because it is so egregiously policy-violating). I'm sorry, but, what the hell? You just allowed a POV-pushing single-purpose-account to jam a fringe conspiracy nut-loving, BLP coatrack mess into article-space. Did you even read it? Like the part where there is a sub-header titled "Alleged Enemies List", which deceptively links to a "main article" that is actually a low-grade partisan novel titled HRC: State Secrets and the Rebirth of Hillary Clinton? Tarc (talk) 01:39, 29 July 2015 (UTC)
 * First, I just want to say I completely appreciate your class and tact in your critique. You've named two articles that might have been bad calls out of 700 or so I've approved with little to no issue. WP:TOOSOON policy varies greatly between shows, some series like it done immediately on show announcement as soon as it can pass WP:CRYSTALBALL. The Clinton article obviously had issues, but my job is to make sure it passes the bare minimum guidelines set out for AfC approvals. One of the biggest community consensus amongst AfC editors is that it's not the worst thing in the world for an article to immediately go to AfD, we'd rather wrongly approve and it be corrected without missing a net, instead of scaring away editors who seem to be acting in good fiath. I advise you review AfC policy before trying to derail someone. Sulfurboy (talk) 04:16, 29 July 2015 (UTC)
 * I also feel this is troubling - is not alone, as you can see at the AfD, consensus is strongly against this article being approved. Not only that, but why would you move something like this with all that garbage on top to main space? Another editor  deleted this section immediately, as it had nothing to do with the Clintons. This doesn't make any sense; it is like you did not look at the article. The editor who created it has been around since 2006,  so I don't see that there was any chance of scaring anyone away by declining it. Nobody is trying to derail you here - we're just trying to figure out how this occurred.  —Мандичка YO 😜 12:09, 29 July 2015 (UTC)


 * If it was just the Big Brother thing, whatever, that's just a WP:TOOSOON tv show. But if you're letting egregious BLP violations into article-space, esp when they target a former president and a current candidate, then then you can expect to be challenged here.  If AfC is beacing run like a fly-by-night diploma mill, then it may be time for a reevaluation of the process and its participants. Tarc (talk) 12:25, 29 July 2015 (UTC)
 * Not to pile on but I also want to point out this article doesn't even have an introduction. Isn't there a basic AfC checklist? This article is now at the WP:BLP/N. Sulfurboy, Can you please respond as to what happened here in the AfC process?  —Мандичка YO 😜 13:40, 29 July 2015 (UTC)
 * Not having a lead section is not a reason to reject a AfC an easy guide for the process can be found here. My intent (and what I thought I had done) is when I removed the remaining afc comments was to move the first section into a lead. Not to defend my decision (as I see now it was an egregious error) but instead to explain it...1) It was incredibly biased before and edits were made, I think seeing such a large improvement tricked my mind into think it was acceptable 2) If it did have continuing issues it would be caught by other editors and sent to AfD (the system worked fwiw). 3) Edits would be made other editors to counter or defend accusations in time. I did believe there was worth for convenience of research to compile the controversies, but obviously there was a better way to go about it. Please feel free to either copy and paste this response where applicable or ping me where I need to respond. Thanks. Sulfurboy (talk) 13:55, 29 July 2015 (UTC)
 * OK, I can see how that would happen (seeing the huge improvement led your mind astray I think). If you were still arguing this article was good I'd be concerned, but I'm confident there are no problems. Thanks for explaining. —Мандичка YO 😜 14:08, 29 July 2015 (UTC)

13:58:42, 27 July 2015 review of submission by 195.169.108.143
Hello Sulfurboy, could you please elaborate why the included footnotes do not meet the minimal standard for inline citations. Please not that there is also a general publications list in the article, but the citations to support the claims made in the article are provided as footnotes in the References section. 195.169.108.143 (talk) 13:58, 27 July 2015 (UTC)
 * The biography section, which could be considered most contentious has no inline citations. Sulfurboy (talk) 00:11, 28 July 2015 (UTC)
 * Thanks. I've added a few inline citations to that section, please have a look if you have the chance. 195.169.108.143 (talk) 14:39, 29 July 2015 (UTC)
 * Approved. Sulfurboy (talk) 14:43, 29 July 2015 (UTC)

28 July review for Dimitris Paraskevas article
Hi Sulfurboy,

Thank you for reviewing draft article Draft:Dimitris Paraskevas. If possible, would you be able to elaborate on the reason for rejecting the submission? In my opinion the inline citation is adequate and proves the statements made. Could you please help me understand the problem? Specifically, can you please point out an example of an inadequate citation or a statement that needs to be footnoted? Thanks for your time and cooperation!Angelamarc (talk) 12:47, 29 July 2015 (UTC)
 * Second paragraph of early life section. Should be good after that. Sulfurboy (talk) 15:35, 29 July 2015 (UTC)

Draft Article
Hi, I have been working on this article for a while now and have had numerous comments regarding notability and references. If it wouldn't be a bother for you (and really only if it isn't), could you advise me on how I could get the article up to Wikipedia standard? With regards to notability, I have added all I can regarding his work etc. but can't reference anything other than the work on Emmerdale as all articles I can find on him now relate to the show as it's so popular and his most present work... I have been told I can't link to Wikipedia or the IMDb and when I referenced RottenTomatoes (which I believe to be independent and reliable), I was told it was only a mere name-drop and nothing else so was irrelevant though I only referenced the page to prove the role he played in the movie/series. Many thanks... Article -> https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Draft:Ryan_Hawley JoshDunn98 (talk) 15:33, 29 July 2015 (UTC)
 * If you can't find the proper sources then that is evidence that this person is simply not notable at this time. Sulfurboy (talk) 15:36, 29 July 2015 (UTC)

Request on 15:38:47, 29 July 2015 for assistance on AfC submission by 154.69.162.175
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Draft:Rockville_2069:_A_Rock_Musical

Based on your previous comment, the story and character breakdown were edited. Do you recommend that it is further condensed? Is there anything else in the article that should also be condensed?

Your kind assistance would be appreciated.

154.69.162.175 (talk) 15:38, 29 July 2015 (UTC)
 * Like I stated before the article looks (and still does) like a playbill. I would almost cut out the character descriptions and act and scene descriptions entirely. You would only see something like that on the most famous of plays or Broadway musicals and even then not usually or done as a separate page. This play is not notable enough for that at this time. The article should focus on a brief summary of the play, reviews and why it is particularly notable. Sulfurboy (talk) 16:18, 29 July 2015 (UTC)

Serianna
Hello Sulfurboy, my name is Metalworker14. I was asked to create the article that I really knew nothing about. I've never heard of or listened to Serianna. I was just asked by The Cross Bearer to do and decided to help him out with it. --Metalworker14 (Yo) 16:22, 29 July 2015 (UTC)

You may be doing this already
One thing that helped me a very great deal when I was starting out in the AFC project was watching, then contributing to the AFC Helpdesk. I found that there were areas I expected to be clear to the editor I reviewed that were obviously not, judging by their reaction and cries for help. I'm still learning

I am cordially inviting you to come and join in there. And you may be there already. Your reviewing skills will improve and improve as you play there. Fiddle  Faddle  16:32, 29 July 2015 (UTC)
 * Just bookmarked it, I'll have to keep an eye on it. Especially since we've gotten the backlog down. Thanks! Sulfurboy (talk) 16:36, 29 July 2015 (UTC)


 * It's a great place to see other folk answering questions that we all thought were too obvious to even be asked! We learn patience and humility, and even sometimes put those into practice! It's a great place to learn and learn from other reviewers and from the editors we review. Fiddle   Faddle  16:43, 29 July 2015 (UTC)

New album page for Gaelic Storm's album "Matching Sweaters"
RE: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Matching_Sweaters

You mentioned that this article needs additional citations for verification. I have added another from the band's webpage... not sure what else is needed (I am kind of a rookie). I built the page based on the others before it and I thought I had everything that was needed.

If something else is needed it would be great if you could direct me as to what that might be.

Thanks! — Preceding unsigned comment added by Theflash95 (talk • contribs) 17:26, 29 July 2015 (UTC)
 * The tag wasn't meant to be a knock on you. The page is fine as it is, it doesn't have any worry for AfD or such. But on album pages like this, when I only see primary sources, I like to add the tag in hopes that someone will find secondary sources to add, such as a critique of the album or a discussion about it. Sulfurboy (talk) 17:33, 29 July 2015 (UTC)

16:56:55, 29 July 2015 review of submission by HayMerchant
I have a question about your review of this page: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Draft:Thom_Serafin

These are your reasons for rejection: External links should be removed from the article and either added to an exlink section or scraped. Other accomplishments should be made into a prose form and reduced to what is most relevant. Article should be formal and neutral, with all puffery removed.

I've fixed the first two, and I hope I've addressed the third, about puffery & neutrality. But, as a total noob, I'm not sure I've done an adequate job. For example, I (among other edits) replaced "kickstarting his career" with "beginning his career," removed information about some awards that he has won, and removed the name of another Hart spokesman as it's not relevant. Is that the sort of thing you're talking about or did I miss the mark?

HayMerchant (talk) 16:56, 29 July 2015 (UTC)
 * Yeah all those things are great. The next thing you can do to help your chances is try to track down some sources that deal with Serafin directly, such as articles about him primarily or profiling him. It seems the majority if not all the sources only really mention him in passing. Sulfurboy (talk) 17:05, 29 July 2015 (UTC)

Hi Sulfurboy, I currently have four sources that are more or less profiles of him, do you suggest that I rewrite the article to rely more on these?

Also, thank you for the quick attention.

HayMerchant (talk) 17:51, 29 July 2015 (UTC)

17:55:16, 29 July 2015 review of submission by Elizabethwood4
I'm wondering what needs to be changed in the Christian Lopez Band wikipedia draft. I'm not sure if I need to change the subject material or just worry about finding other sources. The sources I have used, I feel are reliable, but please let me know what I need to specifically work on. Thank you!

Elizabethwood4 (talk) 17:55, 29 July 2015 (UTC)
 * The article currently fails WP:NBANDSulfurboy (talk) 19:19, 29 July 2015 (UTC)

question about AfC decline, Draft:Michael_Elliott
Hello Sulfurboy, thanks for taking a look at Draft:Michael_Elliott. I'm quite surprised you declined as WP:FAILN, however.


 * Yes, I read the FAQ. :-)   You claim the draft suffers from a failure to meet WP:42, WP:V, and WP:N plus for good measure WP:BIO.  I've read them, and they obviously don't apply.
 * new talkpage section, check
 * not asking you to do the work, check, WP:CHOICE
 * link to page, Draft:Michael_Elliott

Are you seriously suggesting that this fails WP:42, specifically The Guardian 2007 and 2010, Huffington Post 2010, New York Post 2011, Politico 2011, independent.co.uk 2015, and NPR 2015.

There are plenty of sources, with a range of many years, and considerable depth in terms of word-count / specificity / etc. I thought this was WP:SNOW for speedy-accept. Which refs do you dispute? 75.108.94.227 (talk) 20:15, 29 July 2015 (UTC)
 * You're welcome to resubmit and see what another editor thinks. But to me the first five are just routine coverage of a promotion. Would see this coverage of any person, doesn't make them automatically notable. Six is decent, but the only one out of the seven that's acceptable and it's not even incorporated into the article (neither are any of the seven for that matter). The last is a primary interview which can be used but doesn't help establish notability. Sulfurboy (talk) 20:21, 29 July 2015 (UTC)
 * Apparently we are inherently going to disagree. Podunk Local Newspaper story about the promotion of the local Deputy Constable to their new job title of Assistant Sheriff, is routine coverage.  Major national and international newspapers report *important* promotions.  This guy was the #2 editor at TIME Magazine for five years, and his promotions started being real-world-notable when he achieved that status.  I mean, you can argue that we have a presidential election every four years, yawwwwwn, who cares what the next president's name is gonna be... same old routine political coverage must not be REALLY notable right?   ....but that's NOT what WP:RS actually means.  I'll resubmit, talk to you later.  75.108.94.227 (talk) 20:27, 29 July 2015 (UTC)

Request on 20:30:27, 29 July 2015 for assistance on AfC submission by InstaSD
I need assistance as I believe the sources that I cited are reliable published sources and I do not have other sources to reference and I would really like to publish this article. I have read over Wikipedia:Identifying reliable sources and I don't see why these sources do not work. I have gone ahead and added more sources to the article. Please let me know your help is truly appreciated.

InstaSD (talk) 20:30, 29 July 2015 (UTC)
 * Hi, the issue was with the fourth source which seems to be corrected. I would recommend though before resubmitting that you take out the promotional tone in the article and replace it with a neutral, formal tone. For example: "Instabuggy.com provides shoppers with an online portal to order groceries...", instead say "Instabuggy.com is an company that provides online groceries". The article should just be giving facts not giving an outlet for the company to speak. You also had issues with the headers, but I went ahead and fixed that for you. Sulfurboy (talk) 20:34, 29 July 2015 (UTC)

I wonder if you will consider another thought
I have found that it is better use of my time to try very hard to review the same draft once only. This does, of course, increase the backlog if few other reviewers are active, but it provides a better experience for the new editor. One can also argue that further eyes provide a better review. I moved to, mostly offering comments rather than reviews when I'd reviewed a draft previously. Fiddle  Faddle  19:30, 29 July 2015 (UTC)
 * I might do that more often. Although, I do like it when I establish a rapport with an editor who is making an effort to fix things. And also to prevent backlog it's easy to just reject articles of people who haven't made any effort. Sulfurboy (talk) 19:45, 29 July 2015 (UTC)
 * I try to work with the rapport folk and help them with drafting, simply because I will not re-review the draft. The second class, I find they react better to a different reviewer declining for much the same reason. I know what you mean, of course. Fiddle   Faddle  20:57, 29 July 2015 (UTC)

Erathna Mini Hydro Power Project
Hello. I saw your COI tag on this article. Please see Denawaka Ganga Mini Hydro Power Project. I believe their may be a COI too. I am concerned about the images as well. One is a Google image which is certainly copyrighted. The schematics are suspicious as well. It seems this author was heavily involved in the project and may be using their company or firm's information for the articles. I asked the author on their talk but no response.--NortyNort (Holla) 21:14, 29 July 2015 (UTC)
 * Thank you for pointing this out. I will look into it. Sulfurboy (talk) 21:16, 29 July 2015 (UTC)

Request on 21:55:15, 29 July 2015 for assistance on AfC submission by Dreafea
Hi! Just trying to get feedback on what didn't work within the article. Does any of it work? We're trying to build a historical perspective on what the hotel has been within the community as centuries have passed. Can you please provide some feedback and perhaps some advice?

Dreafea (talk) 21:55, 29 July 2015 (UTC)

Serianna
I recommended it to him to create their profile, and I addressed concerns with my edits to show GNG.The Cross Bearer (talk) 02:47, 30 July 2015 (UTC)

Request edit to a footnote you created
Hi again Re 1st Australian Civil Affairs Unit General Peter Gration Peter Gration, one of our Unit's former commanding officers, has suggested some changes to our article. I have made the edits to the main body but do not know how to edit one of the footnotes you created for us. Would you please either (a) tell me how to do it, or (b) make the edits for us. If the latter, the requested edits are to Footnote 3. Firstly, delete "construction" between "engineer" and "squadrons". Secondly, replace "within" with "throughout" before "1 ATF". Thanks again for all your help with this project. Don Limn (aka 1acau)1acau (talk) 00:11, 30 July 2015 (UTC)
 * I wasn't the one that helped you with that, but I'd be able to help now. Can you just write for me word for word what it should say? Sulfurboy (talk) 09:33, 30 July 2015 (UTC)